Jack and the Bean Stalk

All you see is darkness . . . [[do nothing]] [[open your eyes]]

"JACK! Get yer lazy arse out ah bed and come help me with somethin" [[Get out of bed and help]]

Your nap has left you groggy and disoriented, but the room around is just as plain and boring as you remember it. "JACK! Get yer lazy arse out ah bed and come help me with somethin" [[Get out of bed and help]]

You get out of bed and walk to the kitchen. Mother is adding a log to the furnace as you enter. [["What is it Mother?"]] [["How can I help?"]]

"Don't ye take that tone with me, Boy. Ol' Bessie has all but dried up. Without her milk, we can't afford to feed her anymore. I need ye to take her down to the market and sell her so we can afford enough seed to plant a fine crop this season." [["Do I have to?"]] [["Okay Mother."]]

"Sorry for waking ye Jack, it's just that Ol' Bessie has all but dried up. Without her milk, we can't afford to feed her anymore. I need ye to take her down to the market and sell her so we can afford enough seed to plant a fine crop this season." [["Do I have to?"]] [["Okay Mother."]]

"Only if ye want to eat this year, ye lazy sack of bones. Now git, and don't make me tell ye twice" [["Okay Mother."]]

You leave the house and walk over to Ol' Bessie's pen. She snorts and lets out long and deep "Mooooo." [["Yeah, me too girl"]] [[Say nothing]]

The walk to town is long, but good company quickens time's passing. [[Enter the marketplace]]

The walk to town is long, and you are exhausted by the time you arrive. [[Enter the marketplace]]

People stand about in every direction, but you spot the farmer you are looking for. Pete always buys cows once they've gone dry. You begin to walk towards him when you hear a voice behind you. "Jack! I think you may want to hear my offer first." [[Ignore the voice]] [[Turn around]]

You continue walking and start up a trade with Pete. He offers less seed than you were hoping for, but it should be enough for this season. [[Return home]]

You see the voice belongs to an old, funny looking man who happens to be missing his pants. [["How do you know my name?"]] [["Who are you?"]]

Mother scolds you for not bargaining for more seed. Double chores for three weeks! . . . GAME OVER [[Try Again?]]

Try NOT choosing that next time, okay? [[Start]]

"I know many things. I know you don't want to sell Ol' Bessie for some boring bag of seed. What you need, are these" The old man produces what appears to be 3 beans. [["Are those beans?"]] [["Where were you keeping those?"]]

"Oh, Jack, my name isn't important here. This is //your// story. What //is// important, are these" The old man produces what appears to be 3 beans. [["Are those beans?"]] [["Where were you keeping those?"]]

"//Magic// beans, my boy. I'm willing to offer all three for Ol' Bessie here. Whattya say?" [[Yes]] [[No->Ignore the voice]]

The old man brushes your question aside. "These are //Magic// beans, my boy. I'm willing to offer all three for Ol' Bessie here. Whattya say?" [[Yes]] [[No->Ignore the voice]]

The old man's eyes twinkle as he smiles. "You've made the right choice, Jack." He takes Ol' Bessie and turns to leave, but stops and turns back. "Oh, I almost forgot. Don't plant those indoors, makes quite a mess." [[Return home->Checkpoint]]

-CHECKPOINT- Mother is waiting for you when you return. "Took ye long enough. No Bessie with ye, where's the seed?" [["So...I have these beans"]] [["Someone hit me over the head and took them, I swear!"]]

"Beans? Ye traded Ol' Bessie for three measley beans?!?" Mother grabs the beans from you and throws them out into the yard. "How have I raised such a fool? Get to bed at once!" [[Go to bed]]

"Ye lie to me another time an I'll be hittin ye over the head, Boy. What's that ye got in yer pocket?" You produce the beans. "Beans?!? You've traded Ol' Bessie for BEANS!!" You feel the thump to your head before you see her move, and your vision begins to fade. [[Sleep]]

You wake up the following day, yet a darkness is cast on you from the sky as if you were in the shade. [[Get up and investigate]] [[Must still be night, go back to bed]]

A giant beanstalk has sprouted out of the yard. Your eyes follow it upwards to the point where it breaches the clouds. [[Climb]]

You sleep uneasily for another hour, until you wake to the sound of Mother screetching. "JACK! What have ye done, foolish boy!!" [[Get up and investigate]]

You arrive at the top of the stalk. A giant castle sits atop the clouds. Its entry door is almost ten times your height. [[Knock]]

When you wake, your pockets are empty, and a bump has risen on the back of your head. Without seed, cow, or beans, food will be scarce this season. . . . GAME OVER [[Try Again?->Checkpoint]]

As you approach the door, you realize the gap between the door and the doorframe is wide enough to slip through. [[Slide through]] [[Knock anyway]]

You slide past the door. The interior of the castle is just as large as the outside. A deep rumbling can be heard in the distance, and grows steadily louder. "FEE-FI-FO-FUM!! I SMELL THE BLOOD OF AN ENGLISHMAN!!" [[Hide Under a Giant Chair]]

A giant man answers the door. "WELL HELLO THERE LITTLE FELLA. YOU KNOW, NOT MANY OF YOUR KIND USUALLY HAVE THE DECENCY TO KNOCK. WAIT RIGHT HERE." The giant closes the door. [[Wait]]

"SNEAKY LITTLE RODENTS SLIDE INTO MY HOME UNINVITED?!? I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DISRESPECT ME!" A giant head appears, its eyes fixated on you. In one quick motion, his fist clamps around your body. . . . GAME OVER [[Try Again?->Checkpoint]]

The giant returns carrying a sack full of gleaming golden treasure. "HERE. THIS IS WHAT PEOPLE ARE USUALLY AFTER. I'D RATHER HAVE IT IN THE HANDS OF SOMEONE LIKE YOU." [[Return home->End]]

You return home with the sack of golden treasures. Mother will no longer have to worry about paying for seed. . . . YOU WIN!!