You've achieved relative success in the career you dreamed you'd have ever since you were a little girl.\n\nBack then, you didn't realize that any sense of accomplishment you had about your work would get undermined daily by hundreds of complete strangers.\n\nYou don't want to seem ungrateful. After all, many of them already resent you ... and they even tell you so. You don't want people to think the worst of you. You don't want your loved ones to be concerned. You don't want to seem like a quitter.\n\nBut ...\n\n\n\nHow do you feel?

You tell a joke.<<silently>><<set $Followers = $Followers + 100>>\n<<set $AngryMen = $AngryMen + 52>>\n<<set $FunnyMen = $FunnyMen + 37>>\n<<set $InspiredFemmes = $InspiredFemmes + 10>>\n<<set $WhiteKnights = $WhiteKnights + 50>><<endsilently>>\n\nYou now have <<print $Followers>> followers.\n\nYour mentions column contains <<print $AngryMen>> pedantic corrections, <<print $FunnyMen>> dudes repeating your joke back to you, <<print $InspiredFemmes>> favorites, and <<print $WhiteKnights>> retweets.\n\n<<if $Followers gte 9000>>Today, your follower count exceeded 9000. You're officially [[Super Saiyan]].<<endif>>\n\n<<if $Followers lte 9000>>[[Gotta post more.|POST]]<<endif>>

<<set $Followers = $Followers + 100>><<if $Followers lte 9000>>Your work could use more traction. More pageviews, more visibility -- more money for you. Social media is a valuable networking tool. It'll help you get your work out there.<<endif>>\n\n<<if $Followers gte 3000>>You're starting to feel overwhelmed. You tell your friends, privately, that you might quit public life entirely, even though you now have what you originally believed would be your dream job. You remember this, from time to time, and your own stubbornness keeps you going.<<endif>>\n<<if $Followers gte 9000>>Oh, hey ... your follower count just exceeded 9000. You're officially [[Super Saiyan]].<<endif>>\n\n<<if $Followers lte 9000>>[[Gotta post more.|POST]]<<endif>>

You completed a project.<<silently>><<set $Followers = $Followers + 100>>\n<<set $AngryMen = $AngryMen + 10>>\n<<set $FunnyMen = $FunnyMen + 10>>\n<<set $InspiredFemmes = $InspiredFemmes + 1>>\n<<set $WhiteKnights = $WhiteKnights + 50>><<endsilently>>\n\n[[Better go link to it somewhere on the internet ... |PROJECT]]\n\n[[Ugh, but do I have to?|BURNOUT]]

You link to a recently completed project.<<silently>><<set $Followers = $Followers + 501>>\n<<set $AngryMen = $AngryMen + 52>>\n<<set $FunnyMen = $FunnyMen + 37>>\n<<set $InspiredFemmes = $InspiredFemmes + 10>>\n<<set $WhiteKnights = $WhiteKnights + 50>>\n<<set $Stalkers = $Stalkers + 1>><<endsilently>>\n\nYou now have <<print $Followers>> followers.\n\nYour mentions column contains <<print $AngryMen>> dudes who seem resentful of your success, <<print $FunnyMen>> retweets, <<print $InspiredFemmes>> kind responses, <<print $WhiteKnights>> misguided flirtations from complete strangers, and <<print $Stalkers>> threats of violence and/or rape.\n\n<<if $Followers gte 300>>You feel overwhelmed.<<endif>>\n<<if $AngryMen gte 300>>A lot of men seem very angry about your success. You get notifications from men telling you that they are actively trying to demoralize you and convince you to quit. Your friends tell you not to take it too seriously, but they can't hide the concern in their eyes.<<endif>>\n<<if $Stalkers gte 5>>You've been getting a lot of scary emails. You've started a secret file folder to document them. You aren't sure when you should go to the police.<<endif>>\n\n<<if $Followers gte 9000>>Oh, hey ... your follower count just exceeded 9000. You're officially [[Super Saiyan]].<<endif>>\n\n<<if $Followers lte 9000>>[[Gotta post more.|POST]]<<endif>>

You don't use social media much. You could stand to use it more. You have 150 followers.<<silently>><<set $Followers = 150>>\n<<set $AngryMen = 0>>\n<<set $FunnyMen = 0>>\n<<set $InspiredFemmes = 0>>\n<<set $WhiteKnights = 0>>\n<<set $Stalkers = 0>><<endsilently>>\n\n[[Start talking.|POST]]

Maddy Myers

Over 9000

[[Ugh, do I have to?|BURNOUT]]\n\n[[Okay. I'll tell a joke.|JOKE]]\n\n[[I'll link to a completed project.|PROJECT]]\n\n[[I don't have time for this. I have work to do.|WORK]]

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