Stan Loona - or else!

KPOPALYPSE PRESENTS AN INTERACTIVE HALLOWEEN STORY: STAN LOONA - OR ELSE! You are at home, sitting in front of your computer, reading some posts on your favourite k-pop online community about various k-pop groups. A discussion thread is called "Stan Loona - or else!". You've never liked Loona, but piqued by mild curiosity and a hefty dose of boredom, you open the thread, and see the following. STAN LOONA - OR ELSE! ALL INDIVIDUALS WHO READ THIS THREAD MUST STAN LOONA REPLY TO THIS THREAD WITH "I STAN LOONA" OR FACE CONSEQUENCES YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES + + The thread is posted by an account that you don't recognise, who only has one post to their name, this one. You figure that it's probably a troll account, Loona fans sure are annoying like that. What do you do next? [[Report the thread to the moderators->Report]] [[Ignore the thread for the next five minutes->Nothing]] [[Reply "I Stan Loona"->Stan]] [[Leave a bitchy comment->Bitchy]]

You send a report to the moderators for inappropriate behaviour, asking them to remove the thread. The moderators act swiftly - almost as soon as you finish typing out the report, the thread is gone. You bless the virtues of a tightly-moderated k-pop forum that cares about its membership. [[Resume browsing the k-pop forum->Resume]]

You decide to ignore the thread and not feed the troll. The next time you navigate to the forum homepage, you notice that the thread has vanished. "Mods must have removed it... just as well", you think to yourself. [[Resume browsing the k-pop forum->Resume]]

While you're not a Loona fan, you've always been inclined to superstition, and so you figure that it's better safe than sorry - you type in "I Stan Loona." However, when you hit "post", the forum generates an error message. NO SUCH THREAD EXISTS You navigate back to the forum homepage and see that the thread has been completely removed. "Moderators must have got rid of it... just as well", you think to yourself. [[Resume browsing the k-pop forum->Resume]]

You resume browsing your favourite k-pop forum. There are lots of posts today. Which article do you read next? [[BTS breaks new records in the US, "Love Yourself" triple platinum->BTS]] [[CL prepares for sixth American single, collaboration with Kanye West->CL]] [[Check out these hot behind the scenes pictures of WJSN->WJSN]] [[What's the thing that annoys you the most about k-pop fandoms? Mine is...->ANNOY]] [[Siwon from Super Junior has lost his dog, Bugsy->BUGSY]] [[Is it just me or is the answer to any question starting with "is it just me..." always "no"?->ISITJUSTME]] [[T-ara's Jiyeon attends Seoul Fashion week, first time since 2015->JIYEON]] [[Loona on hiatus to prepare for Halloween comeback->LOONA]] [[Thief breaks into YG Entertainment film set, steals Blackpink "Ddu-du Ddu-du" props->YG]]

Fuck this loser, don't they have anything better to do? Time to put this troll back under their bridge. You leave a comment: "Loona are overhyped shit. Maybe someone would like your crappy flop group if you fans weren't so fucking annoying. Go eat Elon Musk's dick." However, when you hit "post", the forum generates an error message. NO SUCH THREAD EXISTS You navigate back to the forum homepage and see that the thread has been completely removed. "Moderators must have got rid of it... just as well", you think to yourself. [[Resume browsing the k-pop forum->Resume]]

You read the thread post about BTS, you've always liked them. The thread poster copy-pastes content from a recent news article and talks about BTS's advancement and commercial success in the United States. As a k-pop fan you can't help but feel a little proud of their accomplishments. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You click the thread about CL's latest attempt at American advancement. Kanye West has always seemed a bit unhinged to you, but there's no denying that he has star power and cultural relevance, maybe his promotional power will be enough to finally get CL over the line into American super-stardom. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You click the thread about the girls of WJSN. The thread is just a pictorial with no text, but a few pictures of each of the WJSN girls hanging around on the set of their latest music video. They all look good and it's hard to pick a favourite. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread about annoying k-pop fans. The thread author writes at length about how he really hates fandoms like BTS and Loona who spam-promote their faves endlessly in irrelevant places. The thread looks unfinished, as the last statement is cut off mid-sentence, perhaps the poster accidentally posted it earlier than intended and will edit it later. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread post about Siwon's dog. The thread poster has just copy-pasted a news article. Apparently Bugsy went missing last night, and nobody knows his whereabouts, but the police are involved because on the night of the disappearance evidence of a break-in was found - thieves had cut through a window mesh to gain access to Siwon's house. Aside from Bugsy being missing, nothing was stolen. You've always liked Siwon, and you hope that he finds his dog soon and that the perpetrator is brought to justice. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread about "is it just me or...". The thread author answers his thread question with a single word - "yes". What a stupid thread, the author is clearly just taking the piss. A few comments on the thread scold the author for wasting their time. Oh well, it killed a few seconds of boredom. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread about Jiyeon attending Seoul Fashion Week. It's a copy-paste of a news article, but the thread poster had added some extra bonus pictures of Jiyeon from both 2015 and more recently. She looks great and doesn't seem to age, which you suspect is probably at least partially due to plastic surgery, but certainly lots of beauty products and gym time in any case. You think about how much it would cost in both time and money annually for someone to maintain a face and body like Jiyeon's. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread about Loona's hiatus. It's a copy-paste of a press release article from a Loona fansite. Apparently they are having a break as a full group. There are plans for Loona 1/3, Vivi and Odd Eye Circle to all release mini-comebacks, but no plans for the full group or the yyxy subunit at this time. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You read the thread about the break-in at YG Entertainment. It's a copy-paste of a news article. Thieves broke into the film set studio and stole some of the iconic items from Blackpink's "Ddu-du Ddu-du" video: Jennie's huge hat, Lisa's samurai sword, Jisoo's swinging chandelier. The thieves then hotwired the mirror-encrusted tank and escaped. While they were there they also trained Lisa's parrot to say "stan Loona". Some people do the craziest things. All of a sudden you hear a knock at the front door of your house. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just some annoying salesman. However you do feel oddly paranoid about answering it for some reason. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it.->Answer]] [[Ignore the front door.->NoAnswer1]]

You'd better do the right thing and get that door. You go downstairs to the front door and open it in a carefree manner. The screen door is still closed. Through the screen, you're greeted by Loona's Chuu. She is brandishing a samurai sword. She smiles and waves at you, with that weird smile that she always has, and then with one quick thrust she stabs the sword straight through the screen door mesh and into your ribcage. You look down in agony as you see the blade entering your lungs. You notice that the sword's blade has a pink and black handle and the word "BLACKPINK" written across it. You look back up at Chuu, who is still smiling at you. As you gradually bleed to death, she admonishes you in a mocking tone - "maybe if you'd stanned Loona, this wouldn't have happened!" THE END + + --------------- (death #1 - "Heejin")

You decide not to answer the door. You're not expecting visitors, so it's probably just a door-to-door salesman or the Jehovah's Witnesses again. Surely it wouldn't be anyone else. Looking back at your computer and the k-pop forum, you notice that you have received a new private message. [[Read the private message->Read]] [[Ignore the private message->Do not read]]

You open the message. It's from the same user who posted the threatening message about Loona before: ANSWER THE DOOR - NOW + + Your heart skips a beat, and your mind starts racing. How do they know that there's a knock at the door? How do they know where you live? How do they know YOU? Something is definitely wrong. You consider your next step carefully. [[Go downstairs to the front door and answer it - cautiously ->Answer2]] [[Ignore the front door and forget about it->Do not read]]

You decide that you're not going to waste your time with this. You resume browsing the k-pop forum. The knocks become louder and louder, and eventually turn into forceful banging. All of a sudden you hear a loud crash, which sounds like your door being kicked in. You jump up in your computer chair, startled. Opening the door to your bedroom, you walk out into the hallway. Suddenly you're on the floor looking upward. Above you is Loona's Chuu. In one hand, she is brandishing a samurai sword, covered in blood. The sword is pink and black, and has the word "BLACKPINK" written across the blade. In the other hand Chuu is holding onto someone by the waist, someone dressed exactly like you, who is slumped against her. Chuu smiles at you, that crazy smile she always has. "Chuu is here!" she exclaims, seemingly very pleased with herself. You look at the person that she's clinging onto, dressed exactly like you, and notice that they have no head. "That's odd..." you think to yourself, as you gradually lose consciousness. THE END + + ------------------------------ (death #2 - "Hyunjin")

You'd better get that door - and be careful about it! You go downstairs to the front door and open it in a cautious manner. The screen door is still closed. Through the screen, you're greeted by Loona's Chuu. She is brandishing a samurai sword. She smiles and waves at you, with that weird smile that she always has, and then with one quick thrust she stabs the sword straight through the screen door mesh. Expecting danger, you flinch back and the blade just misses piercing your torso, flexing in mid-air. Chuu pulls the blade out of the hole she just made in your screen door, and back towards herself. She smiles at you. "Chuu is happy to be here!" she says merrily as she skips around in a little circle. You notice that the sword has a black and pink handle, with the word BLACKPINK written across the blade. Chuu then starts slamming her boot into the door. "Chuu is coming to visit! Trick or treat! Do you have some pie?" she exclaims, while kicking, periodically flashing you an aegyo grin in between kicks. Clearly she is insane, but how best to handle this? What do you say to Chuu? [[Why are you being like this? (attempt reason) ->whypie]] [[There is no pie, good bye! (attempt confrontation) ->nopie]] [[Yes there is pie, please come in! (attempt appeasement) ->pie]]

You ask Chuu "why are you being like this?". She looks at you and grins even wider. "Chuu is being like this because she wants your pie! Do you have pie for Chuu or don't you?" [[There is no pie, go away! (attempt confrontation)->nopie]] [[Yes there is pie, please come in! (attempt appeasement) ->pie]]

You say "there is no pie - good bye!" Chuu stops. "Oh, guess I'll be going then. I'm so sorry to bother!" Chuu stops kicking in your door, does a small bow in your direction and walks away. You watch Chuu as she leaves. Once she gets about twenty feet away, Chuu yells out "These non-Loona-fans have NO PIE! It's time for the TRICK!" - not at you, but in the opposite direction, away from your house and down the road. You think to yourself - being stabbed wasn't threatening enough to count as a Halloween trick? You feel a sense of impending dread. What do you do? [[Panic->panic]] [[Panic a lot->panic]] [[Take defensive measures->panic]] [[Pray to the deity of your choice->panic]]

You say "yes there is pie, come in!" You open the door for Chuu. Chuu quickly runs in and leaps on top of you, stabbing you multiple times in the stomach and chest with the samurai sword. "Thank you! You're so nice! Why don't you stan Loona more? Where is the pie?" she asks, while continually stabbing. You try to point in the general direction of the kitchen but your physical predicament makes it a little difficult to do this effectively and you just end up waving your left arm around and spurting blood everywhere. Chuu nevertheless seems to understand - she stops stabbing you, gets up and walks toward the kitchen, returning in a few seconds with an apple pie from the refrigerator that you don't even remember putting in there. She sits down at your dining table and eats the apple pie with both hands, while watching you slowly bleed out. "You know, I've heard that statistically, people who stan Loona get stabbed less, and they also get to eat pie more. It's not too late to change sides - people who stan Loona heal faster", says Chuu. You try to say something in reply but you just end up coughing a clump of blood instead and passing out. THE END + + ---------------------------------------- (death #3 - "Haseul")

Before you can do anything at all, you hear a loud rumbling sound, as a silver reflective object moves up the road. It's a large tank, encrusted in reflective mirrors. The tank rolls up to Chuu and parks next to her. The top of the tank opens and Olivia Hye pokes up her head. She looks at Chuu. The tank's engine is still running. Chuu yells over the din: "They don't stan Loona! No pie either!" Chuu then screams some other stuff at Olivia Hye that you can't quite hear due to the tank noise. Olivia Hye ducks back down into the tank and closes the hatch, then there is a mechanical whirr as the tank's cannon barrel starts rotating in the direction of your house. There's no way you can defend against something like this. What do you do? [[Run->run]] [[Stand your ground->stand]]

Fuck this shit, you're outta here. You quickly open the front screen door and bolt outside, running down the street as fast as possible. You hear more mechanical whirring and then a loud bang as Olivia Hye's tank fires a shell at you, which misses and knocks down a small brick fence a few metres away from you. You can hear the tank behind you as you run, surely it can move faster than you. You know that you can't run forever and will need to think of something. You turn a corner in the street and continue running. The tank hasn't rounded the corner yet, you can see two options. On the left side of the street there's a small pedestrian tunnel protected by bollards which leads to a railway station - running to it would give away your position but the tank probably can't fit through there easily. On the right side closer to you there's a couple parked cars that you could hide between. You've probably got time to make it to these cars and hide before the tank rounds the corner fully, but will they guess your hiding spot? [[Run for the tunnel->tunnel]] [[Hide between the cars->cars]]

You stay by your doorway, determined to stand your ground. The tank barrel rotates until it points at you and then stops. Olivia Hye opens up the lid of the tank and pops her head up, she then looks at you. She says nothing, but her quizzical facial expression clearly reads "do you really want to die this much?". Meanwhile, Chuu is skipping in random circles, grinning as usual, ignoring you but perhaps anticipating the coming violence. [[Continue to stand your ground->stand2]] [[Run like a motherfucker->run]]

You look Olivia Hye dead in the eye, and give a slight nod. Looking slightly unbelieving, Olivia nods back to you and drops down into the tank body again. Gears clank and whirr as she adjusts her aim slightly so the tank barrel is perfectly aligned with your face. You smile, thinking about how cool "destroyed by an explosive shell fired from a glitter-tank driven by Olivia Hye" will look on your obituary. THE END + + ------------------- (death #4 - "Yeojin")

You make a break for the railway station's pedestrian tunnel. The tank rounds the corner much quicker than expected, seemingly slightly out of control. You hear a mechanical whirr telegraphing another shot, but right before the shell is fired, the tank runs right over the two cars on the other side of the street, crushing them completely and causing the tank suspension to bounce to the point where the shot misses completely, blowing a hole in the road behind you instead. You escape down the tunnel. After a couple twists and turns in the tunnel you end up at the railway station. You look behind you - neither Olivia Hye nor Chuu appeared to have followed you... or if they have, they're still a decent way behind you. The train station is very crowded - two trains have just arrived at the station from two platforms in opposite directions. This makes it easy to slip through the crowds for now without drawing attention to yourself, however in a while the crowds will dissipate. You think that you should probably catch a train and put as much distance between yourself and these Loona girls as possible, but you don't have much time to decide which one. You look around for a platform sign to show what destination the trains are going to, but you can't see any. You need to get on board a train, and fast. Which one? [[Take the modern-looking electric silver train with red stripes->silver]] [[Take the older-looking yellow diesel train->yellow]]

You run to the parked cars, squeeze yourself snugly in between them, and peer out to take a stealthy look at your pursuers. The tank comes barrelling around the corner much faster than expected, but not too fast for you to see that Olivia Hye's tank driving skills are fairly reckless. You're certain that she doesn't see you hidden there, but due to her wanton trajectory she's actually going to run right over the top of both cars anyway, and you in the process. The last thing you see before the tank turns your body into a bony non-Loona-stanning pulp is Chuu skipping along the footpath, smiling all the while. THE END + + -------------------- (death #5 - "ViVi")

You board the modern-looking silver train with red stripes. It is exceptionally crowded, but is gradually emptying out. An announcement says "this train terminates here". The train generates a low electric hum. There's still a lot of people around and there's easily enough time to change to another train. Do you want to stay on this train? [[Stay put->silver2]] [[Change trains->yellow]]

You board the older yellow train. It is fairly empty, the few who are here look like tourists. An announcement says "this train: Namseong, Isu, Naebang, Banpo, Hakdong, then express t***--**###--###**#*nd". The train then makes a slow hissing noise. While there aren't many people in this train, on the platform it is still very crowded and you might be able to change trains unseen. Do you want to stay on this train? [[Stay put->yellow2]] [[Change trains->silver]]

You decide to stay on the silver train, even though it isn't going anywhere. After a few minutes the crowds all empty out, and then a transport worker comes moving through the carriages to clean the seats and look for lost property. No doubt she is going to tell you to leave the train once she gets to your seat. You could wait for her to demand that you exit the carriage thus buying the maximum possible amount of time, or you could just leave now. [[Get off now before the transport worker reaches your seat->chuutrain]] [[Wait for the transport worker to reach your seat, buying time->time]]

You decide to stay on the yellow diesel train. The train makes more hissing noises and then the engine makes an odd belching sound and stops completely. Another announcement is played through the train sound system: "Attention: please note that due t***&*^--*--##-#**-ot be stoppi-*###-etwee-#*---####--##-#&*on----###-#*#-nd. Thank you." A couple near you hear this and sigh, then leave the train immediately, the other few passengers all stay on. You look outside, the crowds have thinned out. It might be too late to change to the electric train or maybe just to make a run for it without being seen by Chuu if she is still following you, but you could risk it. The other option is to stay put and hope that this train gets its shit together and successfully goes somewhere. [[Leave the train and switch to the other train->chuutrain]] [[Leave the train and make a run for it->chuutrain]] [[Stay on the train and hope for the best->yellow3]]

You stay in your seat. Eventually after a few minutes, the transport worker reaches your seat. She takes one look at you and reaches for something on her belt, then you feel a sharp electric shock which makes you convulse in your seat. The transport worker has fired a taser at you! "You don't stan Loona hard enough, stay right there!" she says. Wincing in pain you look up at her and notice her identification badge: "GO WON - TESLA ELECTRIC". Your heart jumps in your chest - you've been found. You rush to get up, but it's too late - Chuu has boarded the train and is running towards you, Blackpink's samurai sword at the ready. Go Won delivers another shock through the taser and you double over in pain again. There's no escaping this time. THE END + + ------------------------- (death #6 - "Kim Lip")

You leave the train quickly - but not quickly enough. Chuu and Olivia Hye are both waiting for you, and grab you as soon as you leave, pushing you down to the tiled floor of the train platform. Olivia then holds you down while Chuu raises her Blackpink samurai sword above her head, smiling gleefully. "Don't worry! People who stan Loona die with at least 30% less pain!" THE END x x ----------------------------- (death #7 - Jinsoul)

You decide to wait on the train. You don't have to wait too long. After a few seconds, the train makes some more belching noises, and then with an abrupt shudder starts progressing down the track very slowly. You breathe a sigh of relief. In your relative safety, you become curious - you wonder if Chuu and Olivia Hye did actually follow you all the way to the train station and try to find you? A quick peek out the window before the train fully departs the station will tell you this, and if you don't see them you can start breathing a lot easier. However if they did follow you, they'll no doubt be watching the train leave, and peeking back at the platform will reveal to them both which train you got on, if they see you. [[Peek out the train window->peek]] [[Don't peek out the train window->nopeek]]

You quickly peek out the train window. Chuu is right in front of you, on the other side of the glass, running alongside the train! She bangs her Blackpink sword against the window in the direction of your face, but the glass is surprisingly strong and doesn't break. Eventually the train picks up more speed and clears the platform. Once the train's speed is sufficient to outpace Chuu, she stops chasing your train carriage and starts running back the other way just as quickly, grabbing Olivia Hye's hand as she goes. Since Chuu knows that you're on this train and is still presumably on the hunt, there's no way you're going to be getting out before the end of the line. You figure that she could probably get to the next stop faster than your rickety carriage if she hitched a ride in Olivia's tank. [[Stay on the train as long as possible->stay]]

You don't dare look out the window, there's a good chance that Chuu is right there on the other side of the glass. You keep your head down and try to calm yourself. After a few minutes the train plays an announcement: "this train: Namseong, Isu, Naebang, Banpo, Hakdong, then express t***--**###--###**#*nd". The train starts slowing down, it's going to stop at the Namseong station. Getting out is probably a good idea - unless Chuu is waiting at the next station. She'd have to get there pretty fast to beat the train, but then she does have access to a tank, so who knows what she's capable of - assuming she even knows you're on it. On the other hand, you have no idea where the end of the line for this train is and how far away you'll end up if you stay put, maybe the destination is even worse. Without the knowledge that looking back at the platform would have provided, it's difficult to assess exactly how paranoid you're being. [[Get out of the train at the Namseong station->namseong]] [[Stay on the train as long as possible->stay]]

You stay on the train. The train stops about half a dozen times at different inner-city stations, and you don't look out of the windows at any time during these stops. The train then spends a long time travelling without stopping at all. It seems you've boarded an express line - just as well, it'll put some distance between you and those crazy Loona girls. With no end to the journey in sight, fear eventually gives way to boredom. You wonder if you should read some k-pop news articles on your phone? There might also be something about your predicament on there. Surely the chaos hasn't escaped the attention of Korea's k-pop news departments which are always very quick to respond to any incidents no matter how trivial, let alone something like what you're experiencing right now. [[Read some k-pop news articles->news]] [[Don't read some k-pop news articles, just wait->yongma]] [[Fuck that - why aren't you CALLING THE POLICE, you moron?->police]]

The train pulls up at Namseong station, and you get out. The platform is fairly empty, and you start looking for an exit, when you begin to hear a rumbling sound. All of a sudden, people around you start running, as the Blackpink bling-tank crushes a couple cars in the parking lot next to the platform. Chuu is riding on top of the tank, smiling with glee, as she looks over at you standing on the platform and swings her tank-mounted machine gun in your direction. You try to make a run for it but Chuu's bullets are a lot faster than your feet. THE END x x ----------------------- (death #8 - "Choerry")

You look up some k-pop news articles. Which one do you read? [[Hyuna starts up "Trouble Maker" online dating service for idols only->Hyuna]] [["Taller Than You - No, Really" - Mamamoo/Gfriend diss battle heats up->Gfriend]] [[Skull arrested on drug charges, released on 5kg bail->Skull]] [[Slayer's Kerry King seen cowering in corner during Twice show "the fans are too hardcore"->Slayer]] [[Authorities find Blackpink's glitter tank abandoned in shopping mall after brazen theft, trail of destruction->Tank]] [[New NCT album comes with pocket guide "12 reasons to not stan BTS instead"->NCT]] [["Finally we scared off that crazy Canadian cunt" - Apink discuss their "I'm So Sick" concept change->Apink]] [[Studies show 76.3% of statistics on k-pop news sites are fabricated->Stats]]

After what feels like a few hours but was perhaps less, the train gradually slows down. An announcement plays over the train sound system "This is the last stop, now stoppi-*#-#&*on----###-#*#-nd", as the train gradually rolls up to the train platform. Nobody else on the train, and looking through the window you can see that the platform is deserted. You depart the train and walk through the platform area to the road outside, trying to get your bearings and figure out where you are and what to do next. On the left is a large, deserted amusement park, you can see through the gates that there are a few people inside, you could ask them where you are. Across the street is a park and picnic area. You see a young lady playing frisbee with a dog by the picnic tables, maybe you can get directions from her. [[Approach the young lady with the dog->Yves]] [[Approach the amusement park->park]]

You call the emergency number on your phone. "Hello, what is your emergency?" a girl answers. "Help me... you've got to help me, I'm being chased by Chuu wielding a samurai sword and Olivia Hye in a tank, and they've already tried to kill me, I'm on a train and I don't know where I am! But you need to send the police!" There's silence. Then the girl speaks. "This isn't funny. This is the tenth call I've had just like this today. I'm terminating this call. You kids need to get a life!" The girl on the emergency services line then hangs up in your ear. You sigh. You guess that it's logical enough that she wouldn't take your call - if you were her, you wouldn't believe you, either. You look at your phone. Maybe at least you can look at some k-pop news sites or something. [[Read some k-pop news articles->news]] [[Don't read some k-pop news articles, just wait->yongma]]

HYUNA STARTS UP "TROUBLE MAKER" ONLINE DATING SERVICE FOR IDOLS ONLY *** Hyuna held a press conference earlier today where she disclosed her latest post-Cube business venture - her new idol dating app "Trouble Maker". A dating service "by idols, for idols", users of the service once verified as idols with an active career at an agency that forbids dating, can hook up with other like-minded idols, aided by the app's intelligent profiling which sorts through candidates on the criteria of compatibility, ease of sneaking under the agency's radar and likelihood of future career prospects should the affair become public knowledge. Hyuna revealed that early prototypes of the app had generated much interest among members of high-profile k-pop groups, but declined to say which ones. When asked how E'Dawn would rate using the app's profiling system, Hyuna declined to comment. [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

"TALLER THAN YOU - NO, REALLY" - MAMAMOO/GFRIEND DISS BATTLE HEATS UP *** After photos were releases showing Mamamoo and Gfriend standing next to each other, Gfriend released the track "Taller Than You, No Really", a scathing response to Mamamoo's "1cm (Taller Than You)", featuring lyrics like "our shortest member is taller than your tallest member/stick your face in a blender/if I see a defender say Moonbyul is tall I'll end her". Mamamoo then hit back with "Tall Poppiez", rebuking Gfriend for their attitude, with lines like "Did you get lonely without Han Seo Hee/we set the charts on fire, now would you blow me". Gfriend is currently penning a response, said to be titled "Pardon Your Blackface". [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

SKULL ARRESTED ON DRUG CHARGES, RELEASED ON 5kg BAIL *** Early this morning Skull was arrested at his home in a drug sting operation that also saw 23 other drug suspects arrested and charged. In a court appearance later today, Skull was released on bail, after the bail amount of 5kg of marijuana and 300g of magic mushrooms was met by the defendant. "The bail amount was decided upon in order to limit the supply of drugs in the community" said the judge, adding "besides I was really hungry, court sessions take a long time and they just refilled the snack machine". Skull indicated that he would plead "probably not guilty" to the charges. [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

SLAYER'S KERRY KING SEEN COWERING IN CORNER DURING TWICE SHOW "THE FANS ARE TOO HARDCORE" *** During Twice's "BDZ" comeback in Japan, fans spotted a short bald man with tribal tattoos curled up in the foetal position and crying during the event. The man was later identified as Slayer's Kerry King. When asked later about the appearance, a spokesperson for Slayer stated "Kerry doesn't get out much, but when he does, he likes to mix it up in the pit with fans of other groups and show them that Slayer is the best. However he wasn't prepared for the enthusiasm of Twice's fanbase. Cutting your favourite band's logo into your arm is one thing, but the sheer volume levels from Twice's 'pterodactyl girls' meant that Kerry had to protect his ears, his most precious investment, from the incessant screaming." The Slayer spokesperson went on to say that Twice was "just noise" with "no coherent musicianship, just shock value" and "who can even understand the words, only crazy people listen to that". [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

AUTHORITIES FIND BLACKPINK'S GLITTER TANK ABANDONED IN SHOPPING MALL AFTER BRAZEN THEFT, TRAIL OF DESTRUCTION *** After a brazen theft where several items of value were stolen from Blackpink's "Ddu Du Ddu Du" set, Seoul police have now found the infamous Blackpink "bling tank", which had been abandoned in a shopping mall after suspected "young hoons" led police on a high-speed chase through the city, wrecking cars and firing munitions randomly, before escaping on foot. No casualties are known at this stage, but the drivers, allegedly two young females, are believed to have caused upwards of 3 billion won in damages to cars, roads and infrastructure. The city mayor promised to enact new bylaws to crack down on "reckless hooliganism". Space X CEO Elon Musk offered to build Seoul a mecha to assist in controlling future instances, promising "it will be operational in 90 days - or it's free". Seoul's mayor has yet to reply to Elon's offer. [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

NEW NCT ALBUM COMES WITH POCKET GUIDE "12 REASONS TO NOT STAN BTS INSTEAD" *** At the MNet 2018 music industry conference, an SM Entertainment spokesperson outlined their new strategy for NCT's advancement in the United States. "We're going to include a pocket guide inside the next new NCT album outlining a dozen good reasons why BTS aren't all that great and why fans should restrict their irrational masticating and gum-flapping stupidity to groups carrying the SM brand. It includes advice on how to peer pressure their friends, how to post divisive hate-articles online that rival fandoms won't be able to resist sharing, and the best insults to use if other people disagree with their music taste. We really want as much money as possible from dumb young people as we can get before they grow up and their music taste matures, and with this new business model I think that we can milk those suckers dry and increase our revenues to shareholders by 150% this coming quarter." Reception to the plan was positive with many industry insiders praising SM's forward-thinking business model. [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

"FINALLY WE SCARED OFF THAT CRAZY CANADIAN CUNT" - APINK DISCUSS THEIR "I'M SO SICK" CONCEPT CHANGE *** In an interview for their fan cafe, Apink discussed their concept change for the song "I'm So Sick". "That fucking piece of shit making fake bomb threats wouldn't leave us alone, so we came up with a more adult concept where we look sullen and stare at the camera looking pissed off, we haven't heard from that creep since", said Namjoo. "I think we got the look of the video just right. Some people really just use up air that others could breathe, if only we realised that this was the answer sooner" replied Eunji in a frustrated tone. "Crazy Canadian cunt", added Hayoung, "I can't believe how persistent he was" shaking her head in disbelief. "I'd like to kick that cunt down some stairs one day", sighed Chorong. Apink then posted a reward on their fancafe of 8 million won for any severed limbs mailed to Apink's agency by fans that could be positively identified via DNA testing as belonging to "that fucking cuntosaur". [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

STUDIES SHOW 76.3% OF STATISTICS ON K-POP NEWS SITES ARE FABRICATED *** A professor at Hongdae University revealed some startling facts about k-pop news sites at a press gallery. "76.3% of statistics on these sites are false", he said "and so are many of the quotes. You think that I'm telling the truth but I probably didn't even say this. Maybe there isn't even a Hongdae University, I didn't check, I'm just some guy you're reading about in an article. Hongdae sounds Korean, right? I think I read that word in an article somewhere." [[Read another article->news]] [[Finish reading articles->yongma]]

You cross the street and walk up to the picnic tables. You are about to say something to the lady, when her dog starts barking at you, and she turns to look at you. It's Yves from Loona! She looks at your face and her eyes instantly narrow. "Go, Bugsy! Kill!" she yells, talking to her dog and pointing at you. You try to react but Bugsy leaps at you at incredible speed and tackles you to the ground, biting you repeatedly in the leg before you can even think of a response to this new dangerous situation. "Good boy, Bugsy!" says Yves, encouraging the dog as it repeatedly mauls your shins. You can feel the toxins from Bugsy's infected gums entering your veins and spreading through your body. You know that you're not long for this world. THE END x x --------------------------------- (death #9 - "Yves")

You approach the amusement park. A sign says "Welcome to Yongma Land". You walk through the gate. The park is full of disused, run-down playground equipment. There's a few people milling about, they all seem like tourists. You consider asking one of them for directions when you hear a barking sound and turn around. It's a small dog running up to you, how cute! Everyone around you screams and starts running away, then you realise that the dog is familiar, it's Bugsy, the dog of Super Junior's Siwon! Bugsy grabs onto the leg of one of the tourists and starts chowing down, she collapses and you can practically see the tourist's flesh go gangrenous before your eyes. This deranged killer is surely going to try and infect you next, it's time to get out of here! Perhaps bolting across the road to the picnic area will give you a clear path to get away from Bugsy, but can you keep up enough speed? On the other hand, you might be able to lose Bugsy inside the twists and turns of the amusement park - but you might lose yourself too. [[Head outside Yongma Land, towards the picnic park->picnic]] [[Head deeper into Yongma Land->deeper]]

You sprint as fast as you can across the street over to the picnic area, past the picnic tables where a young girl is standing, and through a wide field of grass. The young girl looks vaguely familiar but you don't get a chance to get a good look at her, you start thinking about who she is and wasn't she the girl with the dog before when an object gets caught in between your legs and you fall face first onto the grass. Looking at your feet, you can see it's the girl's frisbee, which she must have thrown at you. Looking in the direction you came, you can see her walking towards, you, and Bugsy is moving towards you much faster. Suddenly you recognise her. It's Yves from Loona! She looks at your face and her eyes instantly narrow. "Go, Bugsy! Kill!" she yells, talking to her dog and pointing at you. You attempt to get up and continue running but Bugsy is much more agile than you, the dog leaps at you at incredible speed and tackles you back to the ground, biting you repeatedly in the leg before you can even think of a response to this new dangerous situation. "Good boy, Bugsy!" says Yves, encouraging the dog as it repeatedly mauls your shins. You can feel the toxins from Bugsy's infected gums entering your veins and spreading through your body. You know that you're not long for this world. THE END x x --------------------------- (death #10 - "Chuu")

You run as fast as you can through the maze-like amusement park, past many dilapidated structures and broken down buildings. You try to make your path as random as possible, but Bugsy clearly has your scent and is not giving up. However while fast, Bugsy is also clumsy around corners, and the turns are making sure that Bugsy can't pick up quite enough speed to catch you. Eventually you come to a fork, with Bugsy still hot on your tail. On your left, you see a maze of hedges, full of even more twists and turns that might help you finally lose Bugsy. On your right, an oddly familiar-looking roundabout is spinning - perhaps if you get on it, the machine-turning mechanisms will scare away Bugsy completely. [[Go left to the hedge maze->hedge]] [[Go right to the roundabout->roundabout]]

You run to the maze of hedges and start working through the many twists inside. You hear the girl yell "we've got him now - go Bugsy!" All of a sudden you feel a pain shooting up your leg - Bugsy has climbed right through the hedges and taken a bite into your shin. To your horror, you look down and realise that Bugsy can track you by scent and can squeeze in the gaps between the hedges and the ground, disregarding the "maze" effects of the hedges completely. As you wince in pain, you look around and see that the girl has followed you, it's Yves from Loona! You should've known. She smiles as she watches Bugsy knaw at your limb. You slowly collapse and feel Bugsy's fast-acting toxins spread throughout your body, shutting down your vital organs. THE END x x -------------------------- (death #11 - "Go Won")

You run to the roundabout and jump onto one of its many horse saddles. Bugsy however is not as afraid of the mechanism as you hoped, and jumps right up with you, yapping at your feet as they dangle down from the seat precariously. With nowhere to go but up, you climb up the roundabout poles and onto the roof. You peer down at Bugsy who jumps back off the roundabout and starts yapping at you from the ground. The girl who the dog was playing with has now caught up to you, it's Loona's Yves! Of course, it had to be, you think to yourself. "You're in quite a predicament - maybe you should've stanned Loona more!" she shouts up at you, while laughing. You can't run any more, as it would take time to descend from the roundabout and there's nowhere for you to go that Bugsy can't get to first. You also have no way of realistically fighting that rabid dog. You see only two options - you could wait on the roof of the roundabout and hope for a miracle. The other option is to try and reason with Yves, perhaps if you tell her that you do in fact stan Loona she will restrain Bugsy and allow you to live. [[Stay put and hope for a rescue->JYP]] [[Tell Yves that you stan Loona->stanloona]]

You decide to try and reason with Yves. "I tried to stan Loona but the thread went away and I couldn't! It's not my fault!" you say. Yves thinks for a while, and then leashes Bugsy to a nearby pole. She then gets a laptop out of her bag and presents it to you. "I know you're not a Loona stan, we've been watching you for months. It's your kind that we need to get rid of to ensure Loona domination, and I can wait as long as it takes for you to come down from there. However I'm not unreasonable - if you come down and type that you stan Loona into this forum, I'll let you live." Yves smiles at you, cheekily. She seems difficult to trust - but then, what other options do you have? [[Come down and type "I stan Loona" into the laptop->stanloona2]] [[Decline the offer and stay where you are->JYP]]

"Okay, I'll come down", you say. Yves grins. You gradually descend the ladder and drop down to the ground. Yves holds out the laptop in front of your face. It's not an Internet forum. It's a video of you from a few months ago, which has been taken with your own webcam. In the video, you're typing on an Internet forum and reading the post aloud to yourself as you type it: *** Loona's fans are so annoying. They're always trying to make people stan Loona at the most inappropriate times. Why don't they realise that nobody likes their shitty flop group? They only exist because some asshole at Blockberry who probably sells AK47s to African kids had some spare cash. Cancel and dismiss this flop group. Yves shuts the laptop and smiles at you. "I lied, sorry!" she giggles, unleashing Bugsy. You don't know whether to try to attack Yves or just run, but it doesn't matter anyway, as Bugsy is biting into your legs before you can even react. You can feel the toxins within Bugsy's infected gums entering your bloodstream and shutting down your vital organs, one by one. THE END x x ---------------------------- (death #12 - "Olivia Hye")

"I'm not going anywhere, fuck you!" you shout back at Yves. Yves sits down on the ground with crossed legs. "That's fine - I can wait. Have fun not stanning Loona up there!" she spits back, sarcastically. Yves then gets out her phone and starts playing with it, keeping one wary eye on you and the other eye on whatever she's doing on her device. You take a good long look at your surroundings, the first time you've had a chance to really do this in a while. It's quite a good view from on top of the roundabout. You can see far into the distance, the tops of tress, tall buildings, and a surprising amount of helicopters in the direction of the city. After a while you notice that one particular helicopter is heading right in your direction. As it gets closer you start waving your arms, hoping to catch the pilot's attention. Yves notices you do this, initially puzzled by what you're doing, but eventually her face turns into one of fear. All of a sudden she collapses on the ground. You look up at the helicopter, there's a man pointing a rifle - did he shoot Yves? You look back at her, she's still breathing, and you notice a small dart lodged into her shoulder. The helicopter comes to a stop and hovers right above you, and the man climbs down. It's Super Junior's Siwon! "Bitch stole my fucking dog!" he says, unleashing Bugsy and giving him a hug. Bugsy responds by biting into Siwon's leg, but Siwon doesn't seem to mind, perhaps he's already immune to the effects of his dog's infected gums. "Climb up the ladder", says Siwon "the rest of those girls will still be after you, the pilot will take you somewhere safe". You climb up and enter the passenger seat of the helicopter. The pilot is JYP, he smiles at you and pulls up the rope ladder, then takes off back in the direction of the city. "Why are you here?" you ask. "I know it seems odd that I'd work with someone from SM, but us big agencies have to work together a little to stay on top of our game. We can't just let some crooked arms dealers take over so we have to band together." "No, that's not what I meant - what I mean is, why did you help me?" you ask him. He smiles at you and replies "some agencies try to get fans by brute force, but I prefer a different way. Anyone who has survived the cult of Loona is potentially a fan of Twice, and worth looking out for. You do like Twice, don't you?" You think carefully before you answer. THE END --------------------------------------- Congratulations - you didn't die (yet!) Thanks for reading, and have a sp00ky Halloween! - KPOPALYPSE