Good neighbours

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/eltpics/7006357086/in/photolist-bF8pS7-gaMTt2-bU5me4-aFeNV5-aeYymM-bU4QX4-bFa9NS-bF9H6J-bF9jJw-aFeR6L-af2o7W-aomwgj-aeYz6x-d8PQzd-aD657w-bU4SPV-bF9Fyf-cfhxZG-aHs2he-e8wkUV-dKyVFg-cyi3Wq-bF823C-bU3n74-bF7Utm-bU5Xnr-cfhzw5-aFewzN-aFewkA-cfhBu7-aCZ1CE-bFb87j-bU5XCr-dsmkak-aeYosF-bF9vAL-af2ur1-bF9qef-aHpJWZ-bU3mwc-bFbs2W-cfhDFo-awhAyz-bU66bV-bU5Y8a-bU4ie4-aFb24k-dv88p6-ai7g6t-aGPG4v" title="outdoor coffee"><img src="https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7071/7006357086_95d92b66af_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="outdoor coffee"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> (set: $tidy to 0) One of our greatest needs is to feel that we belong. In a world where we move often perhaps for a better job or in some cases because we are forced to, then we may not have that full feeling of belonging. What can we do about this if we are the ones who have moved or the ones who have stayed but suddenly find ourselves with new neighbours or work colleagues? This simulation will take you through some possibilities. If you want some background information first then you can look at the [[Cultural Adaptations Grid ->adaptations grid]] which shows the 5 stages of adaptation and the feelings and reactions associated with the process. The first step is to decide whether you are the new neighbour or the established neighbour. If you are the established neighbour you may be asking yourself, why should I be the good neighbour when I have lived here for years? Isn't it up to the newcomers to adapt and make the first move? The newcomers may be offended by what I say and how I say it. Why should I put myself through the stress of meeting new people who may be very different from me? Try different paths through the game. See how you do and at the end we will come back to these questions. <h3>Decide now whether you are the new neighbour or the established neighbour. </h3> I am a [[new neighbour]] (I just moved here). I am an [[established neighbour]] (I have lived/worked here for many years).

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/cambodia4kidsorg/3737216640/in/photolist-6GfdiE-oKqwPb-a34Mwm-tWMmFe-5CF44i-5HZrQ9-8R9Ni3-bknm9H-9EiPH2-6J8tHM-7NiNmf-crED89-hQyNZ4-hdRoAQ-bcPF5z-e9Udve-e9ZSQL-e9UdjF-c6U9w9-bknnAF-qRLbcL-jBksNo-nY9oBJ-m54q33-3ddXbr-e9ZTb7-bkno9a-qjWS6B-4oBhjx-EzXqA-beuGtp-JTaQZ-3nJamt-5x4YKo-cCznfQ-wDsdC-9pza9e-bW4aBj-yGN5CT-5ydgsv-5gsLdQ-3XFaE-g7GGK6-oCTCUZ-5s5FCA-4dULo8-8mErXv-qTo84j-oUrGyJ-aXX2AF" title="Moving Day"><img src="https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2558/3737216640_3e1111785e_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="Moving Day"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> So you just arrived! It's exciting but it is also stressful. You are not that good at the language yet. You are curious about something you saw in the neighbour's window. You don't know if you should ask about it. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptaion</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the first stage of cultural adaptation: the contact or honeymoon stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are intriguing, perceptions screened <h4>Emotions</h4>Excitment, stimulation, euphoria, discovery <h4>Behaviours</h4>Curiosity, assured, high energy, laughter <h4>Interpretations</h4>Person insulated by own culture. Observations confirm identity Listen to Haytham from Syria talking about his first impressions of Canada, 22 years ago. <iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/92ljyxZ4EWc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> <h3> What will you do?</h3> What is the most important thing just now? 1. It would be great if the neighbours would [[introduce themselves]]. 2. I will go round and [[introduce myself]] to the neighbours now. 3. Oh dear, I don't even know if I am welcome here, so I just think I'll concentrate on getting things (if: $tidy is 0)[ [[tidy]] ] (if: $tidy is 1)[ [[tidy]] ] (if: $tidy is 2)[ tidy. But the house is now tidy and you need to think about doing something else! ] (if: $tidy > 2)[ tidy. But the house is now tidy and you need to think about doing something else! ]

<h2>Moving in</h2> <a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/cambodia4kidsorg/3737216640" title="Moving Day"><img src="https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2558/3737216640_3e1111785e_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="Moving Day"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Someone new just moved in next door. The house has been empty for a couple of months so you are curious. You saw a couple of strange items being carried in and you weren't sure they were speaking your language as they worked together to get their possessions in. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptaion</h3>Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the first stage of cultural adaptation: the contact or honeymoon stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are intriguing, perceptions screened <h4>Emotions</h4>Excitment, stimulation, euphoria, discovery <h4>Behaviours</h4>Curiosity, assured, high energy, laughter <h4>Interpretations</h4>Person insulated by own culture. Observations confirm identity <h3>What do you do?</h3> [[Nothing]] I have my family and friends nearby and you never know who might have moved in. And besides, I'm so busy. I work full-time. We are renovating the house and I'm worried about a couple of elderly members of the family so I am visiting them more often than usual. [[Smile]]! They will probably be too busy to want to be interrupted by me! Anyway I am a bit shy. I am happy to respond if the other person makes the first move but what if we don't even speak the same language? I'll [[go round]], see if they need anything and introduce myself. It's so stressful moving house and I'm sure they will welcome a friendly face. I can always make it quick and arrange a longer visit in the future.

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/spjwebster/3617811672" title="Lonely observer"><img src="https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3568/3617811672_e842b8d1c3_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="Lonely observer"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> You saw some strange things going into the house. It makes you wonder. And they seem to dress differently. Perhaps they don't speak your language? Perhaps they are not interested in meeting locals like you? <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. [[Let us know when you are ready to meet your new neighbour ->established neighbour]]

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/16210667@N02/14844763557" title="The waiting room !"><img src="https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5567/14844763557_ee0d4cecf3_n.jpg" width="320" height="270" alt="The waiting room !"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Well done that you are all set to be friendly when your neighbours come round. That is a very postive mindset. But what if they haven't been round after a couple of days? Does that mean they don't want to meet you? And over the first weekend, the neighbours to the left had a very noisy celebration until very late at night. It kept you awake and since you work on the Sunday that meant you had a terrible day at work. Is it going to be like that every weekend? How will they react if you say something? <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. <h3>What will you do now?</h3> Perhaps you had better think of [[introducing yourself->introduce myself]]? Or will you wait a little longer to see if they [[come round ->introduce themselves]]? Maybe you had better just keep [[tidying ->tidy]] the house.

<a title="By Tobias Wolter (Own work) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html), CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/) or CC BY-SA 2.5-2.0-1.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.5-2.0-1.0)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AHandshake_(Workshop_Cologne_'06).jpeg"><img width="256" alt="Handshake (Workshop Cologne '06)" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/a/a3/Handshake_%28Workshop_Cologne_%2706%29.jpeg/256px-Handshake_%28Workshop_Cologne_%2706%29.jpeg"/></a> Wow! Congratulations! Yes, it may be a bit scary to meet your new neighbours but doing this as soon as possible can only help you settle here more quickly. Over the first weekend, the neighbours to the left had a very noisy celebration until very late at night. It kept you awake and since you work on the Sunday that meant you had a terrible day at work. Is it going to be like that every weekend? How will they react if you say something? Anyway you have decided to introduce yourself. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. <h3> What do you do?</h3> Perhaps this is a great new opportunity for you. Listen to Laurentia from Romania talk about the opportunities available in Canada. <iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/MHjCBb0Scpw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> Go and [[visit->door2]] the neighbours on the left who had the noisy party. Go and [[visit->door3]] the neighbours on the right with the curious object in the window.

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/wikidave/6775312856" title="53/365+1 Mopping"><img src="https://farm8.staticflickr.com/7047/6775312856_1f38ed139e_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="53/365+1 Mopping"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> (set: $tidy to $tidy +1) You have been here $tidy times. Although you do need to tidy up and clean after the move, it might make you feel better to get to know your neighbours a little. Often we fear what we do not know, so the sooner you get to know them, the better! <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. <h3> What will you do?</h3>So what now? You may like to hear a first impression of her new country by a Romanian immigrant to Canada (below). <iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/a8DmjWVLCtI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> 1. It would be great if the neighbours would [[introduce themselves]]. 2. I will go round and [[introduce myself]] to the neighbours now. 3. Go back to your [[tidying->new neighbour]].

<a title="By Palagiri (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AHouse-door_handle001.JPG"><img width="256" alt="House-door handle001" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/2/26/House-door_handle001.JPG/256px-House-door_handle001.JPG"/></a> You knock on the door of your new neighbour. A man opens the door. You can see a young girl behind him. He looks confused. You are beginning to wonder if this was a good idea. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the third stage of cultural adaptation: Reintegration, irritation and hostility <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are rejected <h4>Emotions</h4>Anger, rage, nervousness, anxiety, frustration, <h4>Behaviours</h4>Rebellion, hostility, suspicion, rejection, exclusion, opinionated <h4>Interpretations</h4>Rejection of new culture causes pre-occupation with likes and dislikes, negative behaviours, a form of self-assertion and growing self-esteem. <h3>What do you say?</h3> Hello, I live next door and noticed that you had just moved in. 1. Is everything OK? Do you need any [[help]]? 2. I thought maybe you might be hungry so I brought a [[chicken salad]]. 3. Can I introduce myself, my [[name]] is ....

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/ramtenvej/23362379392/in/dateposted-public/" title="Cultural adaptation stages"><img src="https://farm1.staticflickr.com/610/23362379392_c8c9b61bc4_b.jpg" width="784" height="883" alt="Cultural adaptation stages"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Start the game [[again ->Good neighbours]]? Source: Training for the cross-cultural mind: a handbook for cross-cultural trainers and consultants 1st ed. by Pierre Casse. 1980

<img scr="https://pixabay.com/photo-563349/" alt="Date" height="326" width="245"> <a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/pieterouwerkerk/698594611" title="Calendar: Month View"><img src="https://farm2.staticflickr.com/1392/698594611_084f102690_q.jpg" width="150" height="150" alt="Calendar: Month View"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Did you know that a smile truly is an international language and can break many barriers? We talked to several immigrants about what made the deepest impression on them in the first days and smiles came out top! <h3>Home country - Malaysia</h3>"I would have felt most welcome if neighbours smiled and said 'Hello' to me and my family. This can sometimes take a very long time." <h3>Home country - Iran</h3>1. "I feel welcome when people smile, offer help and are friendly to me." 2. "When someone approached me while shopping and asked where I was from and said 'welcome', and treating me in a kind manner." 3. "People being kind and supportive to me helped me overcome my fears that I would not be accepted by the community, and the fear of the unknown." <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. <h3> What will you do now?</h3> Will you introduce yourself? [[ Are you ready?->door]] [[Not yet->established neighbour]]

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/avlxyz/2589205355/in/gallery-46479389@N02-72157624986738832/" title="Dessert Bar 2 - Il Barocco, Palazzo Versace"><img src="https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2271/2589205355_c60e2242f7_n.jpg" width="320" height="240" alt="Dessert Bar 2 - Il Barocco, Palazzo Versace"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> So here you are at number 65. What will you do? Will you complain about the noise last Saturday? <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the third stage of cultural adaptation: Reintegration, irritation and hostility <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are rejected <h4>Emotions</h4>Anger, rage, nervousness, anxiety, frustration, <h4>Behaviours</h4>Rebellion, hostility, suspicion, rejection, exclusion, opinionated <h4>Interpretations</h4>Rejection of new culture causes pre-occupation with likes and dislikes, negative behaviours, a form of self-assertion and growing self-esteem. <h3> What will you do?</h3> 1. Hi my [[name ->name2]]name is .... We just moved in next door and I'd like to introduce myself. 2. Hi my name is .... We just moved in next door and we were wondering if you would accept a piece of [[cake]]. It is traditional in our country. 3. Hi my name is ... We just moved in next door and we were concerned about the [[noise]] last Saturday.

<a title="By Anders Lagerås (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AJulstj%C3%A4rna.jpg"><img width="512" alt="Julstjärna" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/09/Julstj%C3%A4rna.jpg/512px-Julstj%C3%A4rna.jpg"/></a> You knock on the door. You have a freshly baked cake with you. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the third stage of cultural adaptation: Reintegration, irritation and hostility <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are rejected <h4>Emotions</h4>Anger, rage, nervousness, anxiety, frustration, <h4>Behaviours</h4>Rebellion, hostility, suspicion, rejection, exclusion, opinionated <h4>Interpretations</h4>Rejection of new culture causes pre-occupation with likes and dislikes, negative behaviours, a form of self-assertion and growing self-esteem. <h3> What do you say?</h3> Hello, we are the new neighbours at number 67. I thought we should just introduce ourselves. We brought a [[cake for you]]. It was one of our favourites back home. Hello, we are the new neighbours at number 67. I thought we should just introduce ourselves. Your window looks very pretty at night with the [[star]]. Hello, we are the new neighbours at number 67. I thought we should just introduce ourselves. We were wondering if you had been kept awake on Saturday night with that [[party]] at number 65?

<a title="By User:Kultigin (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ABaklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG"><img width="512" alt="Baklava - Turkish special, 80-ply" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/8f/Baklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG/512px-Baklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG"/></a> Your neighbour smiles and asks you what the cake is called. You tell them it is Baklava. They invite you in for coffee and to taste the cake. They tell you a bit about the neighbourhood and you are able to ask a couple of questions about practical things such as where the cheapest fuel is. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> When you get home you find a leaflet in the latest batch of post. [[Read it ->Leaflet]] Throw away the [[leaflet ->Good neighbours]] .

<p><a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:PaperStar.jpg#/media/File:PaperStar.jpg"><img alt="PaperStar.jpg" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/50/PaperStar.jpg" height="145" width="182"></a><br>"<a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:PaperStar.jpg#/media/File:PaperStar.jpg">PaperStar</a>" by <a href="//commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Jonathunder" title="User:Jonathunder">Jonathunder</a> - <span class="int-own-work" lang="da">Eget arbejde</span>. Licensed under <a title="Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0">CC BY-SA 3.0</a> via <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/">Wikimedia Commons</a>.</p> The neighbour says: "Oh that's right, you're not from this country are you? You will see a lot of these stars at this time of year. They are traditional for Christmas, to help light up the darkness. In fact, our 8 year old has been busy making them at school so we have plenty more than we can use. Would you like one?" You are not used to life in a country with such short days in winter. So it makes sense to you that people should like additional light at this time. You accept this small gift. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> You say thank you and return home. You find a leaflet in the latest batch of post. [[Read it ->Leaflet]] Throw away the leaflet and stay home where you feel [[safe ->Good neighbours]] .

<h3>A frosty start</h3> <p><a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Face_of_SpooSpa.jpg#/media/File:Face_of_SpooSpa.jpg"><img alt="Face of SpooSpa.jpg" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/69/Face_of_SpooSpa.jpg" height="480" width="360"></a><br>"<a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Face_of_SpooSpa.jpg#/media/File:Face_of_SpooSpa.jpg">Face of SpooSpa</a>". Licensed under <a title="Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0">CC BY-SA 2.0</a> via <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/">Commons</a>.</p> The neighbour looks at you and says: "Oh did we keep you awake? I'm so sorry. It was a big event for them. The women's mother was finally given permission to come to this country and this was the welcome party for her. We were so happy to be part of such a joyful moment in their lives." Oh dear! You had not expected this. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you say?</h3> 1. Well some of us have to work on [[Sundays ->Leaflet]], so I hope this doesn't happen regularly! 2. How [[wonderful ->Leaflet]] for them! 3. You will have to tell me more about [[life here ->Leaflet]]. Why don't you come over for a meal? Shall we decide a date?

<h3> Giving a helping hand</h3> The man smiles and tells you his name. He shakes your hand and gestures inside. You see that he and his daughter have been trying to move a large piece of furniture. <a title="Ewlyahoocom at the English language Wikipedia [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AChifforobe.jpg"><img width="512" alt="Chifforobe" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/1/13/Chifforobe.jpg/512px-Chifforobe.jpg"/></a> You offer to help them get it into place. You comment on the piece and he tells you about its history in his family. Then you exchange telephone numbers. He tells you that you and your family must come round for a meal soon when they have settled in. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> 1. You say a warm [[goodbye]] 2. Before leaving you suggest that they make a definite date for the [[meal]]. 3. You suggest they join the local [[community society]] where they can meet other locals and perhaps sign up to some of their events.

<a title="By The House Cafe (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ATheHouseCafeDietChickenSalad.jpg"><img width="512" alt="TheHouseCafeDietChickenSalad" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/6b/TheHouseCafeDietChickenSalad.jpg/512px-TheHouseCafeDietChickenSalad.jpg"/></a> The man smiles and says thank you. He explains that they had been so busy with the move that they had not had any time to go shopping or start preparing food. He tells you his name and introduces you to the rest of the family. You find out that they do not eat pork so chicken was a very good choice. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> 1. You say a warm [[goodbye]] 2. You suggest they join the local [[community society]] where they can meet other locals and perhaps sign up to some of their events.

<a title="By National Cancer Institute [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AFamily_eating_meal.jpg"><img width="512" alt="Family eating meal" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/f/fa/Family_eating_meal.jpg/512px-Family_eating_meal.jpg"/></a> The man then tells you his name and introduces his family to you. You find out about the meaning of the names. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> 1. You say a warm [[goodbye]] 2. You suggest they join the local [[community society]] where they can meet other locals and perhaps sign up to some of their events.

<a title="By User:Kultigin (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ABaklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG"><img width="512" alt="Baklava - Turkish special, 80-ply" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/8f/Baklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG/512px-Baklava_-_Turkish_special%2C_80-ply.JPEG"/></a> You introduce yourself and your neighbour introduces themself too as well as their family. They tell you that their elderly mother, the grandmother of the children, has just arrived from her country and that they held a party in her honour last Saturday. "We hope that it did not keep you awake!" You also have some elderly parents that you are worried about back home. And if they were close by, they could help looking after the children while you were at work. You offer the cake that you have brought. They invite you in for tea (there is also coffee!). <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> When you get home you find a leaflet about being a good neighbour in the latest batch of post. [[Read it ->Leaflet]] Go home where you feel [[safe ->Good neighbours]] .

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/philips_newscenter/14966990551" title="Philips noise cancelling headphones NC1"><img src="https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5559/14966990551_9ca1e461ba_n.jpg" width="320" height="251" alt="Philips noise cancelling headphones NC1"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> You introduce yourself and your neighbour introduces themself too as well as their family. They tell you that their elderly mother, the grandmother of the children, has just arrived from her country and that they held a party in her honour last Saturday. "We hope that it did not keep you awake!" You also have some elderly parents that you are worried about back home. And if they were close by, they could help looking after the children while you were at work. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> You ask them how [[often]] they have parties. You say you are thinking of having a big celebration soon in honour your daughter's coming of age and wondering if there are any local [[rules]] about noise and so on. When you get home you find a leaflet about being a good neighbour in the latest batch of post. [[Read it ->Leaflet]] Put the leaflet in the bin and have a cup of good strong [[coffee ->Good neighbours]].

<a title="By Eric Ward [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons" href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3AFamily_Portrait.jpg"><img width="512" alt="Family Portrait" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/df/Family_Portrait.jpg/512px-Family_Portrait.jpg"/></a> You introduce yourself and your neighbour introduces themself too as well as their family. They tell you that their elderly mother, the grandmother of the children, has just arrived from her country and that they held a party in her honour last Saturday. "We hope that it did not keep you awake!" You also have some elderly parents that you are worried about back home. And if they were close by, they could help looking after the children while you were at work. The "noisy" neighbours talk about a leaflet they picked up recently at the youth club which they think may help their newly arrived mother. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fourth stage of cultural adaptation: Autonomy, adjustment and integration <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are legitimised <h4>Emotions</h4>Self-assured, relaxed, warmth, empathy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Assured, controlled, independent, "old-hand", confident <h4>Interpretations</h4>Socially and linguistically capable of negotiating most new situations. Assured of ability to survive new experiences. <h3>What will you do now?</h3> They offer you a copy of the leaflet 1. Ask them how often they hold parties. 2. You read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]] 3. You say goodbye and go home where you feel [[safe ->Good neighbours]].

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/mo6/761325654" title="Elise says Hi!"><img src="https://farm2.staticflickr.com/1116/761325654_52eb1d83c8_m.jpg" width="163" height="240" alt="Elise says Hi!"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> When you get home you find the local community society has sent you a leaflet about being a good neighbour and asks you if you know of any good places to put them. You wonder if you could do more to make your new neighbours feel welcome. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fifth and final stage of cultural adaptation: Independence/Biculturality <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are valued and significant <h4>Emotions</h4>rust, humour, love <h4>Behaviours</h4>Expressive, creative, actualising. Full range of previous emotions. <h4>Interpretations</h4>Social psychological and cultural differences are accepted and enjoyed. Capable of choice and responsibility. Able to create meaning for situations. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> Read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]] Throw away the leaflet and turn on the [[TV ->Good neighbours]] .

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/garryknight/4120256780" title="Street Party Table"><img src="https://farm3.staticflickr.com/2490/4120256780_cc0ea849a5_n.jpg" width="320" height="213" alt="Street Party Table"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> When you get home you find two leaflets in the post. The local community society sends you a leaflet about being a good neighbour and asks you if you know of any good places to put them. There is also news of a community meal being organised in a few weeks time. Perhaps this is an event your family would like to attend or maybe even help with? And it might be an idea to invite the new neighbours too! But before then you need to find out if they have any specific dietary requirements when they come over and eat with your family. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fifth and final stage of cultural adaptation: Independence/Biculturality <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are valued and significant <h4>Emotions</h4>rust, humour, love <h4>Behaviours</h4>Expressive, creative, actualising. Full range of previous emotions. <h4>Interpretations</h4>Social psychological and cultural differences are accepted and enjoyed. Capable of choice and responsibility. Able to create meaning for situations. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> Read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]]. Sign up to the community [[meal ->Leaflet]].

<p><a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Community_Circle_at_OUR_Ecovillage.jpg#/media/File:Community_Circle_at_OUR_Ecovillage.jpg"><img alt="Community Circle at OUR Ecovillage.jpg" src="https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e6/Community_Circle_at_OUR_Ecovillage.jpg"></a><br>"<a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Community_Circle_at_OUR_Ecovillage.jpg#/media/File:Community_Circle_at_OUR_Ecovillage.jpg">Community Circle at OUR Ecovillage</a>" by <a href="//en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CQ" class="extiw" title="en:User:CQ">CQ</a> at <a class="external text" href="http://en.wikipedia.org">en.wikipedia</a> - Transferred from <a class="external text" href="http://en.wikipedia.org">en.wikipedia</a> to Commons by <a href="//commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Sunray" title="User:Sunray">User:Sunray</a> using <a rel="nofollow" class="external text" href="http://tools.wikimedia.de/~magnus/commonshelper.php">CommonsHelper</a>.. Licensed under <a title="Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.5" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.5">CC BY-SA 2.5</a> via <a href="https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/">Commons</a>.</p> The local community society sends you a leaflet about being a good neighbour and asks you if you know of any good places to put them. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fifth and final stage of cultural adaptation: Independence/Biculturality <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are valued and significant <h4>Emotions</h4>rust, humour, love <h4>Behaviours</h4>Expressive, creative, actualising. Full range of previous emotions. <h4>Interpretations</h4>Social psychological and cultural differences are accepted and enjoyed. Capable of choice and responsibility. Able to create meaning for situations. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> Throw away the [[leaflet ->Good neighbours]] Read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]]

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/ramtenvej/23517887072/in/dateposted-public/" title="Leaflet GN"><img src="https://farm1.staticflickr.com/764/23517887072_14905d4aa5_n.jpg" width="320" height="227" alt="Leaflet GN"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Well done for reaching the end of the game successfully! So what about those questions you had at the beginning? * Why should I be the good neighbour when I have lived here for years? * Isn't it up to the newcomers to adapt and make the first move? * The newcomers may be offended by what I say and how I say it. * Why should I put myself through the stress of meeting new people who may be very different from me? Perhaps you have different questions now? Perhaps you have different answers compared to when you started the game? Best of all, you may have communicated with somebody new in your neighbourhood and discovered that they really appreciate the contact. Remember that our starting point is that we all feel the need to belong and this is what this game has been about. <h4>Story</h4>One of the contributors to this game walks her dog every day through her local area and had noticed an older woman that was often around. On one particular evening, the woman, who was elderly seemed upset. Instead of just smiling and nodding and going on her way as she would usually do, our contributor stopped and asked the woman if she was OK and did she need any help. The elderly woman seemed very grateful for the concern. And as our contributor said: "I would never have thought of doing that unless I had been working on this project!" ----------------------------- You might like to print the leaflet out and leave copies in a local community space. Or act on one of the suggestions today! See the whole cultural [[adaptations grid]] Learn more about culturally responsive teaching at <a href="http://www.absolutely-intercultural.com/?page_id=3140">Absolutely Intercultural</a>. Or start the [[game ->Good neighbours]] again!

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/jow/3025768639" title="Angry Face"><img src="https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3244/3025768639_41968b5f80_m.jpg" width="240" height="180" alt="Angry Face"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> Your "noisy" neighbours do not look too happy. They tell you it was a special occasion and unlikely to happen again soon. Perhaps you are back at Stage 2 of the acculturation process? <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the second stage of cultural adaptation: the disintegration or disorientation stage? <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences are impactful, differences can't be screened out <h4>Emotions</h4>Confusion, disorientation, apathy, isolation, inadequacy <h4>Behaviours</h4>Depression, withdrawal <h4>Interpretations</h4>Differences begin to intrude. Loss of self-esteem. Loss of cultural support ties. Misreads new culture cues. <h3> What do you do now?</h3> 1. You tell them you are planning a celebration in a few week's time for your daughter's coming of age. You hope that it will not disturb them. Perhaps you can try another [[approach ->door2]]? 2. When you get home you find the local community society has sent you a leaflet about being a good neighbour. a) Read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]] b) Throw away the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]]

<a data-flickr-embed="true" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/securityguard/3575140798" title="China Traffic Police"><img src="https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3416/3575140798_03da4a2f11_m.jpg" width="240" height="179" alt="China Traffic Police"></a><script async src="//embedr.flickr.com/assets/client-code.js" charset="utf-8"></script> "Oh we hadn't thought of that. That there could be rules." say your "noisy" neighbours. "We should look it up." You ask if they could share what they find out. <h3> Stages of Cultural Adaptation</h3> Perhaps you recognise some of your reactions from the fifth and final stage of cultural adaptation: Independence/Biculturality <h4>Perceptions</h4>Differences and similarities are valued and significant <h4>Emotions</h4>rust, humour, love <h4>Behaviours</h4>Expressive, creative, actualising. Full range of previous emotions. <h4>Interpretations</h4>Social psychological and cultural differences are accepted and enjoyed. Capable of choice and responsibility. Able to create meaning for situations. <h3> What do you do now?</h3>When you get home you find the local community society has sent you a leaflet about being a good neighbour. 1. Read the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]] 2. Throw away the [[leaflet ->Leaflet]]