You never wanted to be a [[Princess]] that needed to be saved. You wanted to be a [[doctor]], an [[engineer]] or the [[hero]] . Or better yet, the one saving not being saved. You daydreamed of swords and shields, not ivory towers rising impossibly into the sky. Princesses belonged in fairy tales. Your life is decidedly not a story for a book. It's too dark, too raw for fairy dust, glitter wings and hope. You gave up on that as a little girl.Your other fantasy was being a doctor. Was being the operative word. You saw how hard some doctors worked, the devastation of losing a life no matter that they did. They had no power like you thought, and they could fail just like anyone else.My other career choice was going to be an engineer. Because I like to build things, take them apart and see how they are made. I've always been that way, mom hated it because I rarely was able to put things back together and make them work. Sometimes I wish I still wanted to be a [[doctor]] but that dream died young, just like being a [[Princess]]. There's always a chance to be the [[hero]] I guess. But brown girls like me never get to do that. We're always on the sidelines, or getting killed early in the game, <i>if we even exist.</i>I want to be the hero, I want to save the girl or maybe the guy and save the day dammit. I want to be carried on shoulders, given a parade and cheered on. Why can't I have that? I'm not one for castles, I can't build worth a damn and the idea of being a doctor frightens me. What do I do with myself then?