Rabid Dog

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A rabid dog approaches. You carry a small revolver in your pocket. What do you do?: [[a) Throw down your weapon. Hopefully the dog accepts your surrender.|surrender]] [[b) Ignore the dog. You are busy. You've got places to be, and so does this dog. After all, a little rabies never hurt anybody.|ignore]] [[c) Pull out your revolver, aim it at the dog and squint like Clint Eastwood looking into the sun. |aim]]

Hahaha! You're still here! You didn't think I'd make it that easy to quit did you? [[a) Of course not! I knew this would be a trap!|END1]] [[b) I did! Wow all these increasingly meta subversions of my expectation are super clever and hilarious and not at all annoying and played out!|meta]]

Hmm... Well you see, the point of this game is to subvert your expectations. So if you were expecting the last passage then I guess that means one of two things... a) This game was designed poorly! I would like to stop playing now. [[b) I suck at this game. If I was better at having my expectations subverted there wouldn't be a problem.|good day]] Go ahead. Be honest. I can take it.

Correct! Well, I guess you need some more practice. Back to the beginning with you! [[a) But I was trying to qui-|start]]

You throw down your gun at the dog's feet. The dog picks up your gun and shoots you in the face. Why did you think this would work? [[a) Try again. I may be dumb, but I'm not a quitter!|start]] [[b) Quit, because I am dumb and have no appreciation of the arts.|quit]]

Way to de-escalate the situation. Live and let live, am I right? After all, the dog has places to be. Unfortunately, you trip on the curb and die. Try to make smarter choices next time. [[a) I may be dumb, but I'm not a quitter!|start]] [[b) I am in fact a quitter and have no appreciation of the arts.|quit]]

You draw your weapon and aim it at the dog. It continues to advance. What do you do?: [[a) Yell "NOT TODAY MOTHER FUCKER!" and open fire!|shoot]] [[b) Fire all six shots wildly into the air to try and signal for help|help]]

Actually, they are. Looks like you haven't been paying attention. Better start over! [[a) Ok! I shall do this willingly!|start]] [[b) Ok! I shall do this unwillingly!|start]]

"NOT TODAY MOTHER FUCKER!!!" *BANG!* Tears stream down your face and your voice cracks, but your aim is true. Chihuahua brain splatters across the street. An old lady, her leash now connected to about half a chihuahua screams and faints. Good job tough guy, you killed a 6 pound dog. It probably didn't even have rabies. Way to de-escalate. Jerk. [[a) Take me back to the beginning! Maybe there's an ending where I get to kill the old lady too!|start]]

You fire all six shots into the air. Help arrives, but it is more dogs, and they're hear to help the first dog. And they're all wearing matching leather jackets. And one of them has a switchblade... Nope, it's just a switchblade comb. You're still dead though. [[a) Try again. I may be dumb, but I'm not a quitter!|start]] [[b) Quit, because I am dumb and have no appreciation of the arts.|quit]]