Off-Campus Big Mac

You're in line for lunch at Springlawn High. The food sucks and you've gotta pay extra for anything halfway decent. Unfortunately you're low on cash. You missed breakfast and have been starving for hours. You're a Freshman. This also sucks. Your classmates tease you because of a growing list of things that you have no control over. You've learned to wear a hoodie whenever possible. You've only been a Freshman at Springlawn High for three months and everything's already terrible forever. [[It all sucks.]]

Past the lunch line and by the vending machines you see Matt, your best friend since forever. He does not suck. He's waving at you to come over. Maybe he's got something going on to make today cool but... You don't have your food yet, and there's some edible stuff still in those trays. If you leave now, it'll probably all be gone and you'll have to eat wilted salad or ice cold ham sandwiches... again. Do you... [[Go see what's up with Matt.]] [[Need food. Matt can wait.]]

Matt's been your friend since you really could tell what a friend was. He's almost always had your back, but that hasn't stopped him from bailing when things got out of hand. Problem is that he's usually the one that made things get out of hand in the first place.

You approach Matt who rolls his eyes at you. (if: (history:) contains "Need food. Matt can wait") [He sticks his tongue out at the mac and cheese. "Really man?" You shrug.] "We've gotta hurry." He says, gesturing out the hallway. "What's going on?" You ask. [["Senior privilege." Matt replies, grinning.]]

Whatever Matt's got going on can wait, you gotta eat something before you pass out. You point at some questionable mac and cheese at the same time as a cute girl in a year above you. You gurgle something that sounds like your name before she's gotten the food and vanished. You slump and get your own plate of browned macaroni before heading over to Matt. [[What's he got to say?->Go see what's up with Matt.]]

Senior privilege is the name everyone at Springlawn gives the sacred honor of being able to leave campus for lunch. "Uh. Two things." You say. "First, we're not seniors. And second-" [["We don't even have a car."]] [["This is great. Food crimes!"]]

"That won't even be a problem." He says, tugging on you. "We've got wheels and a driver. Now we just need your butt in a seat. Come on!" He dashes off and (if: (history:) contains "Need food. Matt can wait")[you just have enough time to toss your tray into the garbage where it belongs before] [[you run after him.]]

"Food crimes!! Eff the man and their cold mac and cheese of oppression!" He dashes off and (if: (history:) contains "Need food. Matt can wait")[you just have enough time to toss your tray into the garbage where it belongs before] [[you run after him.]]

You dash through the nearly empty hallway and out into the school's parking lot. Right in front by the door is a beat up old sedan. An older kid is leaning against it, talking to someone inside the car. The one leaning against the car is pretty tough looking. He's wearing a military jacket and has tight, dark, curly hair. As you approach the car you notice that he's shorter than you are, but not by much. He's... [[Dreamy.->Get in the car.]] [[Trying too hard.->Get in the car.]]

You smile up at him and turn to Matt to introduce you, but he's gone over to the other side of the car to talk to the girl in the driver's seat. You look back at the older kid nervously. "You're Matt's friend eh?" He says, breaking the silence. "Uh... Yeah." You say lamely. "Name's Pete." The boy says, nodding slowly. "You seem cool. But this is a sacred journey we're going on man. Are you cool enough?" [["Uh..."]]

"Oh no, no that wasn't the deal." The girl inside the car says. Matt peaks at you from the window winsomely. You know that look. You mentally prepare yourself for disaster. The girl glares at you. She's got some blonde streaks in her dark hair and definitely looks familiar. Then you remember and your face pales. You... [[Kinda dated in elementary school.]] [[Spilled food on her earlier this week.]] [[Pulled a nasty prank on her last year.]]

You blush and try as best you can to fall through the asphalt. It's Jenine. You haven't spoken in years and you had forgotten how embarrassing it was but seeing her again is bringing it all back. [["H-hey." You say to the car's tires.->Jenine Response]]

You close your eyes, hoping that this is a dream. It's Jenine. She's scary, older, and you tripped while passing her. That gross lunch food? Yeah, you spilled it all over her. Those daggers she's looking at you with are pretty familiar at this point. [["H-hey." You say, trying to look nonchalant.->Jenine Response]]

Well, not just her. But she got the worst of it. You may have replaced the table's ketchup with ghost pepper hot sauce. You thought it would be funny and it kinda was but... She was all red and crying and well... it wasn't pretty. You never got caught exactly, but Matt definitely brags about the dumbest things to the wrong people so... [["H-hey." You say, trying to look nonchalant.->Jenine Response]]

"Nope." Jenine says, placing her hands firmly on the steering wheel. "No dice, Matt. I said I'd take you, not Mr. (if: (history:) contains "Kinda dated in elementary school.")["Dry-lips."](if: (history:) contains "Spilled food on her earlier this week.")[Butts for brains."](if: (history:) contains "Pulled a nasty prank on her last year.")["..." She shakes her head. "No, no way." She says through clenched teeth.] "Come on Jen, we're here for something beautiful. Don't let the past cloud it." She looks resolved. You're going to have to say something to convince her. "Also we don't have much time..." Matt adds, already in the car. You... [[Appeal to her good nature.]] [[Appeal to her stomach!]] [[Try to flirt your way out...]]

"I know sucked." You say, "But are you really going to hold that against me? You're better than that." She sighs and looks away. "I can't be mad at you when you're so pathetic. Get in." [[Better than nothing!->Inside the car]]

"Aren't you hungry though?" You ask, shrugging. "Wherever we're going's gonna be pretty good right? We wanna get there like, ASAP, don't we?" Matt catches on and and adds "You know, I heard somewhere that if you drive too long on an empty stomach you could die or something." Jenine rolls her eyes, "Oh my god." She unlocks the car. "You're lucky I missed breakfast." [["Get in."->Inside the car]]

You take a deep breath and try out a look you saw on TV. "Can't I... do anything to convince you?" You grin in what you think is a dashing way and lean against the car. Everyone starts laughing at you and Jenine unlocks the car. "Okay okay." She says, "Just don't ever do that again." [[You groan and get in. ->Inside the car]]

"So, where we headed?" You ask. Jenine turns on the radio and hits the gas. Alt rock plays as you and Matt both lift off the back seat as you careen over the speed-bump and into the street. "McDonalds!" Pete yells. [[You've never felt more alive.]]

You've never felt more sick. Jen's driving has been... questionable. You're barely hold on in the back seat between her stops and starts. "H-hey Jen?" You manage to ease between the nausea. "Sup?" "How long have you had your license?" Everyone else turns to look at you, eyes wide in warning. "Oh, like a month or something? I dunno. My dad says I'm a natural." "Oh..." You look at Matt who's turning more green by the second. Do you... [[Grin and bear it...]] [[Open a window!]]

You can do this. Just don't think about the rocking of the car and the heat from the window and... Oh jeez. Matt manages to dive out of the way. [[Here it comes.->Vomit]]

You open the window as subtlely as you can, listening to Pete chat with Jenine about some book they had to have read for today. "Why do we even need to read Frankenstein anyway? We all know how it goes. Guy thinks he's god and makes something awful." "Heck yeah, dude." Luckily they don't notice you breathing through your nose. The nausea dies down. [[Matt isn't so lucky.->Vomit]]

"Oh god! Not again!" Jenine shouts, pulling over to the side of the road with a lurch. Thankfully, because she wasn't looking in the back and doesn't know who to blame, both of you get away with just cleaning duty. "That escalated quickly." Matt says, grimacing. "Yeah." You reply. "Still hungry?" He asks miserably. [["Always."->Still hungry?]] [["I'd eat out of spite at this point."->Still hungry?]]

"Heck yeah man." Matt says, "Don't let the small stuff get you down." "Down? At this point I'll be happy if I eat something before I die." You say, wiping off the last of the foulness from Jenine's backseat. "May be sooner than you think, dude." Pete chimes in. "You two did kind of just muck up Jen's car." You laugh, but stop when you see that Pete isn't. You finish cleaning and everyone shoves themselves back into the car. [[Jenine drives more slowly and you start to breathe again.]]

The window is open, music is blaring, and Jenine isn't speaking to you. You and Matt try several times to fill the silence, but Jenine just keeps turning the music up. It's obvious she's mad, but you're not really sure what to do. "So..." You trail off, trying to think of something to say. What do you say to fill the silence? [["What music's that?"->Ask about band]] [["Why McDonalds?"->Ask about McDonalds]] [["How do you two know each other?"->Ask about Pete]]

"It's stupid, we-" Jenine starts to say before Pete interrupts her. "It's glorious." He says wistfully. "We are students of the mind and are bound by the walls of our establishment. The golden arches are our gates to freedom!" Matt and you look at each other, unsure whether to laugh or not. "Don't cut me off." Jen says firmly. "Oop, sorry dude." Pete says, "Got excited." [["So why?" You prompt her.]]

"Cage The Elephant." Jenine says proudly. "You like em?" She looks at your reflection in the rear view mirror, daring you to disagree. [["Not my style."->Not my style]] [["Now I do!"]]

You watch her face in the rear-view mirror. She's scrunching up in thought. "Well," She says, closing her eyes for far longer than you're comfortable with. "I mean Pete's not wrong, but like. For me, having this car and being able to get crappy food while everyone else is getting what their folks or the school wants them to have..." She trails off. You think you get it though. "It tastes like freedom." She finishes, blushing. What do you say? [["God that's corny."->Response to prompt]] [["That's beautiful!"->Response to prompt]]

"Heh, yeah. I guess so." Jen says. [[The rest of the trip passes by in pleasant silence.->The local McDonalds.]]

"Your loss." She shrugs and continues jamming, although she does turn the music down. You and Matt talk about nothing for the rest of the ride. Eventually, on the horizon, you see it... [[The local McDonalds.]]

"Heck yeah!" She says, turning the music up to max. You all start to jam. You could get used to this sort of thing. The rest of the ride passes in peaceful silence. Eventually, on the horizon, you see it... [[The local McDonalds.]]

It's beautiful. Jen nearly rams into the parking stop but you don't even care. You can smell it already. Fast food burgers. For lunch. In high school. Jenine and Pete are already exiting the car and stretching. "What're ya gonna get?" Matt asks you. You're going to order... [["Kids meal for the memes."->kids meal]] [["Just a double cheeseburger and fries"]] [["Big Mac combo meal!"]]

"...Pete?" She asks, looking at him. He shrugs. "It just kind of happened I guess?" "I moved here a couple months ago." Pete explains, "Jen helped me find my way." "What do you mean?" You ask, latching onto the subject. "She like, helped me get to know folks. Made me feel like I belonged. Sucks moving to a new school, dude, really messes you up." He nods thoughtfully, "Jen helped. Just sort of ran into her though, wasn't a planned thing." "You're embarrassing me, man." Jen says. [["How did you and Matt meet then?" Pete asks you.]]

Uh... You look at each other. "It just kind of happened." "See?" He says. "Friendship's just a total accident. Lame, right?" "I guess." You say, wary of seeming like you care too much. "It's kind of cool though." Pete continues. "Like the universe just happens and we're along for the ride. Get that nihilistic buzz just thinking about it." "Uh... right." You say, trying not to laugh. Matt pipes up, staring out the window. "There it is!" [[The local McDonalds.]]

"For real?" Matt says, "That's pretty risky man. What about Jen and Pete?" "They'll think it's funny." You say confidently. "If you're sure..." Matt says. "Oh I'm sure." You say. "Prime material, and the toys are cool." "For sure." Matt says, grinning. [[You exit the car together.]]

"Keeping it lowkey, I like it." Matt says. "Look dude," You say, "All I want is some dang food for my face. The more we wait the more's going on that order." "Alright alright." He says, "Let's go then before you eat the dang car." "Gross dude." "Heck yeah." [[You exit the car together.]]

"Heck yeah!" Matt says approvingly. "Livin' large, I like it. You going for a shake too?" "Of course." You say, feigning offense. "You aren't? It's the best part." "It is." Matt agrees. "Okay, you've convinced me." "Big Mac!" You yell. "Big Mac!!" Matt choruses. [[You exit the car together.]]

The smell of the deep-fryer almost overwhelms your empty stomach as you enter the restaurant. Thankfully there isn't much of a line and Jenine and Pete are already waiting for their food. Matt goes next and orders the same thing you were gonna. Finally, it's time. You approach the counter. The girl at the register is cute. [[You place your order.]]

[[You reach for your wallet.]]

[[Crap.]]

Uh... you look around desperately. "What's up?" Matt says, coming to your rescue. The register girl looks at you, starting to get annoyed. You make frantic motions, trying to get across that you... "Didn't bring cash with you today?!" He moans, holding his head in his hands. "I know... but you can lend me some, right?" You ask, hopefully. "Dude I would if I could, but I've only got some change leftover." He jingles his pockets. "Wish my folks would let me on their card..." Jenine and Pete notice the hold up. They walk over and Jen doesn't look happy. [[This sucks.]]

(if: (history:) contains "Ask about McDonalds")[You explain the situation, biting your lip and trying to keep it cool. "Oh boy." Jen says, shaking her head. "Pete, do you have anything else?" "Nah dude, sorry." Pete says, sighing. "Only brought enough cash for the burger." You look at Jen hopefully. She bites her lip, thinking. It feels like she's deciding whether or not to let you live. "Eh, it's charity for a good cause." She says, smiling. "Freedom food, am I right?" "For sure." You answer. She hands you a rumpled ten dollar bill and you rush on over to the girl at the counter. [[She rings you up.->Get your food]]] (if: (history:) contains "Ask about band")[You explain the situation, biting your lip and trying to keep it cool. "Oh boy." Jen says, shaking her head. "Pete, do you have anything else?" "Nah dude, sorry." Pete says, sighing. "Only brought enough cash for the burger." You look at Jen hopefully. She bites her lip, thinking. It feels like she's deciding whether or not to let you live. "Why the heck not." She says, shrugging. "Least you helped me out with the mess in my car." (if: (history:) contains "Not my style")[She shakes her head. "Even if your taste in music sucks."] She hands you a rumpled ten dollar bill and you rush on over to the girl at the counter. [[She rings you up.->Get your food]]] (if: (history:) contains "Ask about Pete")[You explain the situation, biting your lip and trying to keep it cool. "Oh, dude." Pete says, "Why didn't you say so? We're all in this together, share what you can. This is our spiritual journey, dude." He reaches into his pockets and pulls out a rumpled ten dollar bill. "Here man." He says nobly, handing you the bill while Jen laughs. "May your burger be juicy and your bun toasty." "Heck yeah. Thanks man." You say, smiling and rushing over to the counter. [[You hand the girl at the counter the bill and she rolls her eyes and rings you up.->Get your food]]]

You all sit together in the car that now forever will smell like McDonalds, munching like there's no tomorrow. You share fries and lament the lack of ketchup packets. (if: (history:) contains "kids meal")[You and Matt make your little robots fight. It is very cool.] "You know." Jenine says suddenly, "I'm still mad at you." Matt and Pete look at you awkwardly. How do you respond? [["Eh."->Second To Last]] [["It's cool, I don't like me either."->Second To Last]] [["Don't care, burger good."->Second To Last]]

THE END. For more stories like this, please visit www.robertrappoport.com

Jenine stares at you and starts laughing, tossing fries at you. "You're such an ass." She says, grinning. "Can't argue with the truth." Matt says. Pete nods sagely. [[You shrug.]]

By the time you've finished your meals and tossed the paper bags, you, Pete, Jenine, and Matt are all talking like you've known each other for years. You don't even notice that you're late for class. But... "Whatever." You all agree. Jenine pulls out of the parking lot without remembering to disengage the emergency break. After a lurch and a deep breath, she gets the car in gear and, laughing, you all ride off back onto the road. [[Hopefully you can keep your lunch down.]]

The Off-Campus Big Mac By Robert Rappoport [[Begin]]