So You Want to Be a Godmother

{(set: $Union to 0) (set: $Rebel to 0) (set: $Wicked to 0) } You stand in front of a rather non-descript office building. It resembles all the other buildings in the surrounding corporate park, perfectly mundane and ordinary. You pull the [[flyer]] from your pocket. You're at the right place. Somehow, you expected the Fairy Godmothers' Union to be more...you know...magical. [[Go inside->inside]]. [[Never mind. This was a silly idea.->Nevermind]]

In bold, sparkly-pink letters, the flyer reads: So You Want to Be a Fairy Godmother! The Fairy Godmothers' Union is always looking for a few good souls to help Mundanes and Folk alike find their Happily Ever Afters. If you are: - Compassionate - Loyal - Obedient - Creative - Kind We want to hear from you! Simply stop by your local FGU headquarters to find out if you have what it takes to make dreams come true. 3971 Opportunity Boulevard. Inside the Belleville Office Park No magic? No problem!

The inside of this supposed Fairy Godmother headquarters doesn't do much to inspire your confidence. It's as functional as the exterior - barely decorated, with little to draw the eye. A large [[reception desk]] stands in the center, currently unoccopied. A small waiting area contains a trio of uncomfortable-looking chairs. You can see a door leading off to the right behind the desk. The corridor leading deeper into the building looks dark and foreboding. [[Sit and wait.->waiting]] [[Explore.->exploring]]

Nope, nope, and nope. This was a terrible idea. Who would want to be a godmother, anyway? Ridiculous. Seriously, these people have to be crazy. Like Arkham Asylum nuts. You are heading back to the mundane world of humans and physics and easy expectations, never to leave it again. ...Unless you change your mind. After all, the Fairy Godmothers' Union isn't going anywhere, right? ------ Thanks for playing! If you want more information about the book series, in which Tessa the down-on-her-luck geek reluctantly becomes a fairy godmother, stop by the author's [Facebook page]<FB| (click: ?FB)[(open-url: "https://www.facebook.com/earthgirly")]! Have a sparkly day! ~EarthGirly (writing as Grace McGuiness)

The receptionist's desk is shaped like a long 'u.' It looks absolutely ordinary, from the computer on one side to the stack of multicolored stickie notes next to the phone. On closer inspection, however, you see that the surface of the polished wood swirls at random, as if reflecting clouds from some other world. A pen in the non-descript pen-holder glows faintly orange. And it looks like there's a fish living inside the computer keyboard. A coffee mug printed with the words, "Duster of the Year!" steams with freshly brewed coffee. At least, you think it's coffee...

Yep. The chair is just as uncomfortable as it looked. The high, straight back makes you sit with ridiculously good posture and the seat is made of some wood harder than rock. A short coffee table in front of you contains a variety of [[magazines]] and nothing else. [Stay here. The receptionist should be back soon.]<Stay1| (click: ?Stay1)[(set: $Union to $Union + 2)(goto: "stay")] [[Try a different chair.->chair2]]

You sneak around the receptionist's desk to investigate the door off to the right. Jackpot! Behind the door is some sort of break room, filled practically to bursting with bubbling tea machines, cases and cases of donuts, creampuffs, and chocolate-slathered croissants, and dainty finger sandwiches. Your stomach growls. Without meaning to, you reach for... [A pink-frosted donut with star sprinkles.]<donut| (click: ?donut)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 2)(goto: "caught")] [A chocolate croissant.]<croissant| (click: ?croissant)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 2)(goto: "caught")] [A finger sandwich.]<sammich| (click: ?sammich)[(set: $Union to $Union + 2)(goto: "caught")]

Buried beneath the usual waiting room fare, you find copies of: Witchwatcher Monthly Spells, Potions, and Pastries, Oh My! and [The Happy Haberdasher - Spring Collection]<getHH| (click: ?getHH)[(display:"HH")]

You try the second chair. It practically collapses under your weight, its woven seat sagging almost to the floor. Once you stop panicking that you've destroyed your potential employer's chair, you realize the softness of the backing is kind of enveloping you like a mama bird's wing. You feel a little dopey with your knees practically to your chest, but man - that's soft! [Go back to the first chair.]<goback1| (click: ?goback1)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(goto: "stay")] [[Try the third chair.->chair3]] [So COMFY! You never want to get up.]<stay2| (click: ?stay2)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 3)(goto: "stay")]

The third chair has the functional appeal (and dignity) of the first combined with the cozy stuffing of the second. It's clearly designed with ergonomics in mind, and the way it supports your lower back is totally worth ignoring its vile puke-green color. Maybe... [Stay here.]<stay3| (click: ?stay3)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "stay")] [Go back to the soft chair. Mmmm, cozy...]<goback2| (click: ?goback2)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 3)(goto: "stay")] [At least the first chair wasn't ugly.]<goback3| (click: ?goback3)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "stay")]

Just as you get settled into your chosen chair, a woman clears her voice. The [[receptionist]] has returned. "May I help you?" she asks, her long nose scrunched as if she smells something foul. [[welcome<-"I found this flyer..."]] [["Never mind. I'm in the wrong place."->Nevermind]]

Her eyes brighten. "Of course! We were worried no one would find those. Looks like someone owes me a glass of bubbly." She glides across the room, one hand upturned in welcome. "Please follow me." [[Follow her.->following]] [["On second thought, I think I'm good."->Nevermind]]

Tall and thin, she looks like Draco Malfoy's mom...if she were a librarian with thoroughly boring hair. Sharp nose; small, disapproving mouth; and green eyes that crackle with lightning. Whatever she is, she isn't human. Or happy.

The receptionist leads the way into that dark and foreboding hallway. You enter the shadows, aware of your quickening heartbeat. You're either going to become a fairy godmother...or get eaten by an ogre. [[Bring it!->still following]] [[Take a deep breath but continue, unperturbed.->still following]] [[Nope, nevermind. It's time to run!->Nevermind]]

Three steps later, the lighting snaps on. Stretching out ahead of you is a hallway bathed in golden light. The tulip lamps spaced evenly along the corridor drip what looks an awful lot like pixie dust. Beneath your shoes, the stone floor gives way to vibrant green grass. Flowers in vivid hues brush at your pant leg as you follow the receptionist into a forest...hallway? You blink several times, but the scene never changes. Yep. The hall is made of trees and stones and [[natural wonders]]. "If you'll be so kind as to wait in here, your orientation specialist will be with you momentarily." She opens a door marked with a golden number 1 and gestures for you to enter. [Sneak by her to see more of the hallway.]<sneak| (click: ?sneak)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "sneak")] [Enter the room with no fuss.]<fussless| (click: ?fussless)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "test room")] [[Turn on your heel and hasten back the way you came; this is crazy!->Nevermind]]

You're pretty sure the end of the hall is shimmering with a tiny waterfall that springs from the ceiling. A ceiling that looks like a puffy white cloud. As you squint at it, a tiny rainbow arcs across the end of the hallway.

That magical hallway is too much to resist! You do your best to dart past the receptionist... ..and smack straight into an invisible barrier. It bounces you back, leaving you to fight to keep your balance on the uneven floor. The receptionist steadies you with a warm hand and a soft laugh. "You don't really think we'd give strangers off the street the freedom to roam our halls unimpeded, do you? In you go." With a snap of her fingers, some unseen force whisks you into Room 1 whether you want to go or not. [[It was worth a shot.->test room]] [[Oops...->test room]]

The room is sparse, like reception. The walls are almost blindingly white and seem to merge into the floor and ceiling without sharp angles. One corner holds a potted plant that's seen better days. Its mate in another corner has already given up the ghost (either that, or someone forgot to plant anything in it - what kind of operation are they running here?). A round table takes up most of the room, surrounded by [twelve chairs]<12chairs|. (click:?12chairs)[(display:"twelve chairs")] In the center of the table sits a [small cauldron]<desCauldron|. (click:?desCauldron)[(display:"small cauldron")] [[Sit in any chair.->Peony]] [[Choose chair 1.->Peony]] [Use chair 2.]<wrongchair| (click: ?wrongchair)[(set: $Union to $Union - 2)(goto: "Peony")] [[Seat yourself in chair 3.->Peony]] [[Flop down in chair 7.->Peony]]

(text-colour:"brown")[*Each chair is identical except for the number etched into its back. They look well-made, even if the wood doesn't look particularly inviting.*]

(text-colour:"silver")[*Pewter. Heavy. About the size of your average pumpkin. It's empty.*]

Your butt is just starting to fall asleep in the chair when a ruckus erupts in the hallway outside. Before you have a chance to investigate, the door bursts open with a blast of golden light and a young woman topples into the room. She skids to a halt, kicks a silver cauldron off her foot, and smooths her pink suit skirt. A frog croaks and hops out of the cauldron as the door closes itself behind her. The young woman spies you and beams. "Sorry about that, butterscotch. My name is Peony. I got here as fast as I could. We were having a little..." She taps a perfectly manicured nail to berry-pink lips and finishes with, "Never mind. You're here because you want to become a godmother, yes? How fantastic!" [[Peony2<-"I found this flyer..."]] [[godfather<-"Well, I did, but..."]]

"Perfect!" Peony takes the flyer from you and drops it into the empty cauldron on the table. A little curl of golden smoke escapes. "In order to determine your aptitude for being a true fairy godmother, the Union has created a test. It's a simple thing designed to show us what's in your heart. Twelve questions. Multiple-choice. Painless, I promise." She beams at you. "Shall we get started?" [["Let's do this."->test1]] [["Uh...no...?"->test1]]

Her shining blue eyes open even wider, making her look like a china doll come to life. "Please don't let my terribly ungraceful entrance change your mind. We really are the very best of professionals, I promise. And the magic..." She pulls out a wand that looks like it belongs at a four-year-old's birthday party. But a cascade of pink sparkles falls from it as she waves it in an arc overhead, so it's clearly real. "Say you'll stay. Please?" She practically glows with earnestness. [["Okay. I'll stay."->Peony2]] [["I'm not going to be a godmother."->godfather2]]

With a whirl of her wand, Peony magics a glowing scroll out of thin air. It drips sparkles as she unfurls it and begins to read with an overlying sweet lilt. "'Welcome to the Fairy Godmothers' Union entrance exam! To become a fairy godmother is no small undertaking. A godmother must be charming, poised, confident, and, above all, compassionate. She must be able to make difficult decisions that affect the lives of her goddaughters with no regard for herself. Godmothers are, therefore, selfless and understanding. If you believe you are in the right place, simply answer the following questions to the best of your ability.'" Peony looks at you over the top of the scroll. "Ready?" [["Yes."->Q1]] [["On second thought, this isn't for me after all."->Nevermind]]

"Is this because of the frog? Because he totally deserved it, and don't you let him convince you otherwise." She glares at the door. Somehow, you doubt the frog is intimidated. "And I know this hasn't gone exactly perfectly, but this is my first test and if I lose you before you even get to answer a single question, why, I'll just break down and cry my poor little eyes out. Please stay." [["Okay, but I want to be a godfather."->godfather3]] [["Fine, but let's get on with it already."->test1]] [["I'm out of here, you cotton candy freak."->Nevermind]]

Peony gasps and shakes her head so vigorously, you worry it might pop off. "Shhhhhh! We don't say things like that here. I mean, nobody says that. Not unless they want...and why would you want that? You wouldn't. So silly!" She lets out a fearful little laugh, glancing at the white walls around you. Her fear passes as suddenly as it arrived. She gives you a long, squinting once-over. "Wait. Are you saying that because you're male?" [["Obviously."->godfather4]] [["Do I look like a dude to you??"->Peony4]]

Peony laughs a twinkly sort of laugh and swats your shoulder. "Silly! A male godmother isn't a godfather! There's only one godfather. You had me worried there for a minute. Glad that minute is over." She mimes wiping her brow and gives you an adorable little grin. "Now, let's on to the test, shall we?" [["Sure."->test1]] [["Nobody said anything about a test..."->test1]]

Peony's hands fly to her mouth in horror. "Oh, I'm so so so so SO sorry! It's very difficult to keep up with Mundane fashions sometimes. Boys can grow their hair long, girls can wear those long sportsing blouse...things." Her earnestness returns, her bright blue eyes as round as full moons. "I tell you what. If you forgive me, I'll give you the correct answer to the test. What do you say?" ["Isn't that cheating?"]<nocheating| (click: ?nocheating)[(set: $Union to $Union + 2)(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "nocheating")] ["I forgive you. What's my answer?"]<cheating| (click: ?cheating)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 3)(goto: "cheating")]

"You're very right and that's very wrong. But the order of 'wrongness' is also explicit." She looks at the ceiling as she recites, "'First is evil. Second is vile. Third is sneaky. Fourth is..." She sighs. "I can never remember the rest. There are so many ways to be wrong." Her berry-pink lips form a small pout. "Anyway, offending someone is worse than a tiny little cheat on a test. Trust me." ["If you say so. What's the answer?"]<cheating2| (click: ?cheating2)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(set: $Wicked to $Wicked +2)(goto: "cheating")] ["I don't cheat, no matter what."]<nocheating2| (click: ?nocheating2)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "nocheating2")]

"The first question asks about the Rule of Timeliness, which says, 'No goddaughter-specific spell shall last longer than twelve hours, for her safety. Time needs must be conserved.' So it's the answer that's twelve hours or less but still adheres to the other rules, including the Rule of Numbers." She looks at your expression and sighs. "7. The answer is 7pm." [["Right. Thanks."->test1]] [["You could've just said that in the first place."->test1]]

"Good for you." She gives you a solid sort of nod with a glint in her eye that suggests you were already being tested. "Now, just relax. This test will be painless. It's designed to show the Union what's in your heart of hearts and your brain...of...brains." She wrinkles her nose but goes on. "Answer as you believe you would answer were you already a fairy godmother. Ready?" [["Absolutely!"->test1]] [["I guess so..."->test1]]

A woman clears her throat behind you. You turn and find the [[receptionist]] staring at you with pursed lips, her arms crossed over a slate-colored blazer. Her round-toed pump taps at the floor expectantly. "By all means," she says, "help yourself." [Apologize.]<apology| (click: ?apology)[(set: $Union to $Union + 2)(goto: "caught2")] [Stuff the rest of your snack in your mouth and smile sheepishly.]<yummy| (click: ?yummy)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 2)(goto: "caught2")] ["Don't mind if I do." Take a bubbly tea, too.]<bubbly| (click: ?bubbly)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 2)(goto: "caught2")]

The receptionist sighs. "I suppose there's nothing to be done about it now. This way." She whips around and takes you [[back to reception->following]].

Peony wiggles with excitement and gives a little cheer. "Question One. Your goddaughter is attending a ball from 8pm to midnight this evening, where she will meet her handsome prince. It's currently 8 o'clock in the morning. When do you cast your beautifying spell?" [A) At 7pm, with enough time to get to the ball.]<Q1u| (click: ?Q1u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(goto: "Q2")] [[B) At 12pm, to get the most out of the spell.->Q2]] [C) At 8pm, so she can sneak into the castle as a servant and gather information first.]<Q1w| (click: ?Q1w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q2")]

The cauldron in front of you flashes, but it's only there for a second. Peony nods, avoiding eye contact. "Ooookay. Question Two. Your goddaughter is in danger! She's about to be attacked by a pack of wolves. Oh dear!" Peony looks distressed. "Unfortunately, there's a throng of mundane villagers who will see any magic you do. Most of them carry torches, but one of them wields an axe. What do you do?" [A) Turn the wolf into a coat right then and there. How dare he attack your goddaughter!]<Q2w| (click: ?Q2w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q3")] [B) Stand at the back of the throng and zap the wolf with a bunny-transformation spell, letting the villagers wonder which of them cast it.]<Q2r| (click: ?Q2r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q3")] [C) Inspire the woodsman to save your goddaughter. He's strong and handsome, and may just be her happily ever after!]<Q2u| (click: ?Q2u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q3")]

The cauldron flares again, a little brighter but still too fast to really see. "That's quick thinking," Peony says with a smile. "Question Three. Your goddaughter needs to escape her captor's manor with no one noticing. What do you do? [A) Use her old clothes from home to disguise her so she can sneak away, undetected.]<Q3u| (click: ?Q3u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q4")] [B) Transform the mouse she's befriended into a mighty steed to help her run away as fast as possible.]<Q3r| (click: ?Q3r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q4")] [C) Blast a hole in the wall. Let her captor know who he's dealing with.]<Q3w| (click: ?Q3w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 2)(goto: "Q4w")]

Peony blinks at you over the top of the glowing scroll. "I...suppose that would work. It totally gets her out of the manor, right?" She gives a little laugh. "So, um. Question Four. Your goddaughter has her happily ever after. Hooray! She's so grateful that she offers you the remaining golden straw that helped her win her prince. Do you... [A) Accept the straw, but turn it into something that benefits the princess or her family.]<Q4r| (click: ?Q4r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q5r")] [B) Reject the straw. Demand her firstborn, instead. After all, you earned it!]<Q4w| (click: ?Q4w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q5w")] [C) Politely decline her gift.]<Q4u| (click: ?Q4u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q5")]

"That one's pretty easy, right?" Peony asks as the cauldron sparks again, this time with a discernable sunny color. "Question Four. Your goddaughter has her happily ever after. Hooray!" Peony cheers. "She's so grateful that she offers you the remaining golden straw that helped her win her prince. Do you... [A) Accept the straw, but turn it into something that benefits the princess or her family.]<Q4r| (click: ?Q4r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q5r")] [B) Reject the straw. Demand her firstborn, instead. After all, you earned it!]<Q4w| (click: ?Q4w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q5w")] [C) Politely decline her gift.]<Q4u| (click: ?Q4u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q5")]

Peony smiles as the cauldron glows a little brighter. "That sure is nice of you. Still looking out for your goddaughter, even when you don't have to. I've always wondered what they're supposed to do with golden straw after their trials are over. Turn it into jewelry? I'm sure they'd think of something, though. Mundanes are so clever." A puff of grey smoke erupts from the cauldron, causing her to jump. "Um, anyway... Question Five! You are meeting a potential new goddaughter to determine if she's a good fit for your assistance. How do you arrive? [A) Cloaked in darkness, from the tip of your pointy hat to the toes of your pointy boots.]<Q5w| (click: ?Q5w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q6w")] [B) Perfectly poised and polished, with nary a hair out of place. A first impression is the most important, after all.]<Q5u| (click: ?Q5u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q6")] [C) Rumpled and out of breath, because you forgot about the meeting until five minutes ago.]<Q5r| (click: ?Q5r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q6r")]

Peony's eyes grow so wide, you can almost read the top of the scroll reflected in them. "I guess, if you worked really, really hard...I mean, that used to be a common trade. Back when good and evil were more...you know...structured. Not that you're evil or anything. Or that that answer isn't good. Just...uncommon. Nowadays." She bites her lower lip and hurries on. "Question Five. You are meeting a potential new goddaughter to determine if she's a good fit for your assistance. How do you arrive? [A) Cloaked in darkness, from the tip of your pointy hat to the toes of your pointy boots.]<Q5w| (click: ?Q5w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q6w")] [B) Perfectly poised and polished, with nary a hair out of place. A first impression is the most important, after all.]<Q5u| (click: ?Q5u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q6")] [C) Rumpled and out of breath, because you forgot about the meeting until five minutes ago.]<Q5r| (click: ?Q5r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q6r")]

The cauldron grows a brighter gold. "Yay!" Peony claps, then seems to remember herself and furrows her brow seriously. Except it just makes her look more adorable. "Um, I mean...I see. Moving on to Question Five. You are meeting a potential new goddaughter to determine if she's a good fit for your assistance. How do you arrive? [A) Cloaked in darkness, from the tip of your pointy hat to the toes of your pointy boots.]<Q5w| (click: ?Q5w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q6w")] [B) Perfectly poised and polished, with nary a hair out of place. A first impression is the most important, after all.]<Q5u| (click: ?Q5u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q6")] [C) Rumpled and out of breath, because you forgot about the meeting until five minutes ago.]<Q5r| (click: ?Q5r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 1)(goto: "Q6r")]

The cauldron swirls black and green, like a Halloween peppermint melted down. Peony clears her throat. "Well, that's...that's super interesting! Knowing who you are is very important." She lifts the glowing scroll higher, blocking her face from view. "Question Six. Something new and strange has happened!" Peony glances at the cauldron, furrowing her brow cutely before hiding again. "Your goddaughter is in line for the throne in her own right. She needs to choose her prince from a pool of suitors. How many do you find for her to choose from? [A) 9 of the most powerful and wealthy men in all the lands.]<Q6w| (click: ?Q6w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q7w")] [B) 3. Only the cream of the crop will do.]<Q6u| (click: ?Q6u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q7")] [C) Every eligible man in the kingdom. If Prince Charming can do it, so can she!]<Q6r| (click: ?Q6r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 3)(goto: "Q7r")]

This time when the cauldron sparks, it leaves behind a swirling golden liquid that reflects your best selfie face ever as you gaze into it. "Almost there! Just two more questions." Peony hums softly to herself as she reads the question silently. "Oh, yes. I like this one. Question Six. Something new and strange has happened! Your goddaughter is in line for the throne in her own right. She needs to choose her prince from a pool of suitors. How many do you find for her to choose from? [A) 9 of the most powerful and wealthy men in all the lands.]<Q6w| (click: ?Q6w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q7w")] [B) 3. Only the cream of the crop will do.]<Q6u| (click: ?Q6u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q7")] [C) Every eligible man in the kingdom. If Prince Charming can do it, so can she!]<Q6r| (click: ?Q6r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 3)(goto: "Q7r")]

Peony giggles. "You and me, both. Not that I forgot I needed to be here to administer your test earlier. Just...you know. It's a little stressful starting out." She tries to straighten her skirt, but it's already as straight as a pencil. "Question Six. Something new and strange has happened! Your goddaughter is in line for the throne in her own right. She needs to choose her prince from a pool of suitors. How many do you find for her to choose from? [A) 9 of the most powerful and wealthy men in all the lands.]<Q6w| (click: ?Q6w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "Q7w")] [B) 3. Only the cream of the crop will do.]<Q6u| (click: ?Q6u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 1)(goto: "Q7")] [C) Every eligible man in the kingdom. If Prince Charming can do it, so can she!]<Q6r| (click: ?Q6r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 3)(goto: "Q7r")]

The liquid in the cauldron lets out a great belch of putrid green smoke. Peony glances at the door. Is it just your imagination, or did she just somehow get closer to it without moving a muscle? "Uh, yes. That would ensure she has a strong consort, wouldn't it? Not to mention solid allies in the future. Let's, um, get to this last question, shall we?" She clears her throat. "Question Seven. Despite your best efforts to keep her hidden and safe, your goddaughter has been felled by a sleeping curse! She is an orphan, raised by her grandmother in the woods, with a strange affinity for animals and seven gnomes for friends. How do you wake her? [A) By finding her One True Love, bespelling his path so that he finds his way to her, and inspiring him to give her True Love's Kiss...even if it takes a hundred years.]<Q7u| (click: ?Q7u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(goto: "TestEnd")] [B) Transform her into a wolf. At the next full moon, the Moon's Call will wake her. She needs to find her own love for herself.]<Q7r| (click: ?Q7r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 2)(goto: "TestEndr")] [C) Find the evil queen who wants to kill her and reveal the girl's whereabouts. Magic will provide the prince who will save her, and his bravery will make him a True Love.]<Q7w| (click: ?Q7w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "TestEndw")]

The cauldron bubbles happily with liquid gold in response to your answer. Peony hops from one foot to the other, barely containing her excitement. Her blue eyes sparkle as she says, "Last one, and then we find out your answer." Which seems kind of silly, since the cauldron looks like it approves. "Question Seven. Despite your best efforts to keep her hidden and safe, your goddaughter has been felled by a sleeping curse! The poor thing. Before the curse, she was an orphan, raised by her grandmother in the woods, with a strange affinity for animals and seven gnomes for friends. How do you wake her? [A) By finding her One True Love, bespelling his path so that he finds his way to her, and inspiring him to give her True Love's Kiss...even if it takes a hundred years.]<Q7u| (click: ?Q7u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(goto: "TestEnd")] [B) Transform her into a wolf. At the next full moon, the Moon's Call will wake her. She needs to find her own love for herself.]<Q7r| (click: ?Q7r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 2)(goto: "TestEndr")] [C) Find the evil queen who wants to kill her and reveal the girl's whereabouts. Magic will provide the prince who will save her, and his bravery will make him a True Love.]<Q7w| (click: ?Q7w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "TestEndw")]

Peony stops to think, staring at the empty white ceiling while scrunching up her mouth adorably to one side. "I hadn't ever thought of it that way. Just because she's not a prince doesn't mean she shouldn't get the same treatment. Huh." The cauldron gives a wet raspberry sound as it squirts a blob of purple goo onto the table. Peony wrinkles her nose in distaste. "Right. Last question. Question Seven. Despite your best efforts to keep her hidden and safe, your goddaughter has been felled by a sleeping curse! Oh, the poor thing. She is an orphan, raised by her grandmother in the woods, with a strange affinity for animals and seven gnomes for friends. How do you wake her? [A) By finding her One True Love, bespelling his path so that he finds his way to her, and inspiring him to give her True Love's Kiss...even if it takes a hundred years.]<Q7u| (click: ?Q7u)[(set: $Union to $Union + 3)(goto: "TestEnd")] [B) Transform her into a wolf. At the next full moon, the Moon's Call will wake her. She needs to find her own love for herself.]<Q7r| (click: ?Q7r)[(set: $Rebel to $Rebel + 2)(goto: "TestEndr")] [C) Find the evil queen who wants to kill her and reveal the girl's whereabouts. Magic will provide the prince who will save her, and his bravery will make him a True Love.]<Q7w| (click: ?Q7w)[(set: $Wicked to $Wicked + 1)(goto: "TestEndw")]

"Of COURSE that's the answer. Everyone knows the only real way to break a sleeping curse is with True Love's Kiss. I mean, True Love is what makes it so powerful, you know? Anyone else is just...a sidekick." She sighs wistfully. "I wish I could have a True Love..." She trails off for a minute. The cauldron froths and bubbles over, spilling gold all over the table. "Oh! What am I doing? 'Your body is here, Peony, but your head is in Giant City.' That's what my mother used to tell me. Apologies. Let's find your final answer, shall we?" [Hold your breath.]<tally| (click: ?tally)[ (if: $Union >$Wicked and $Union >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Union") ](else-if: $Wicked >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Wicked") ](else:)[(goto: "Rebel")] ]

"Talk about thinking outside the box! That kind of spell wouldn't even occur to me. But, you know, she does have some things in common with Red Riding Hood, so the magic would work. Maybe not as well as a Snow White spell, but..." The purple liquid in the cauldron bubbles up and sloshes over the sides. It spreads across the table like glowing ink. Peony sighs. "Magic has no patience. Let's see how you did, hm?" [Take a deep breath.]<tally| (click: ?tally)[ (if: $Union >$Wicked and $Union >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Union") ](else-if: $Wicked >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Wicked") ](else:)[(goto: "Rebel")] ]

"Y-yes. Um. That would definitely make it a powerful spell. Probably a strong True Love, too. It's...um...a solid plan. I guess..." She takes a deep breath and taps the scroll with her wand. The scroll rolls up and vanishes with a popping sound and a cascade of pink and gold sparkles. "Let's see how you did, huh?" It might just be your imagination, but she looks faintly queasy as she reaches her wand out to the cauldron. [Watch intently.]<tally| (click: ?tally)[ (if: $Union >$Wicked and $Union >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Union") ](else-if: $Wicked >$Rebel)[ (goto: "Wicked") ](else:)[(goto: "Rebel")] ]

Peony points her wand at the cauldron and flicks it upward. The liquid from the cauldron geysers upwards, splashing the ceiling. Instantaneously, the ceiling, walls, and floor all turn a brilliant golden color. "Yaaaay!" Peony cheers, hopping up and down. With one extra-big hop, she hovers in mid-air. For the first time, you notice a pair of translucent pink-and-green wings fluttering out the back of her sensible blazer. "Congratulations! You are fit to be a fairy godmother! It's a rare few who are truly suited to join our ranks. I'm so glad you're one of them." She beams at you. "I just know we're going to be great friends. I'm an apprentice, too, you know. We won't have the same mentor, but I'm sure whoever you get will be super nice. I mean, godmothers can't be anything else, right?" She scoops you into a hug and kisses your cheek. "Right this way, friend. I'll take you to initiation. They'll tell you all about the perks there. Like the apartments in Toadstool Landing. And the magic you'll learn! Oh, you're never gonna want to leave. [[This way, this way!->UnionEnd]]"

Peony points her wand at the cauldron and flicks it upward. The liquid from the cauldron geysers upwards, splashing the ceiling. Instantaneously, the ceiling, walls, and floor all turn a dark, tumultuous green. She sucks in a breath. With more stealth than her clumsy body should be capable of, she slides over to the door and holds the handle. "Look, I don't want to be the bearer of bad news or anything, but, um, you're not a godmother. You're--" Thunder rumbles through the room. "Um, strictly speaking, I'm not supposed to let you leave. Company policy. I'm supposed to inform you that a security squad will be down in a moment to collect you as a spy and potential trouble-maker, but..." Her blue eyes widen at you with earnest apology. "But I can't just let them take you, right? That wouldn't be fair. So...um...I'm going to open the door, and you're going to run, okay?" [[Run.->WickedEnd]]

Peony points her wand at the cauldron and flicks it upward. The liquid from the cauldron geysers upwards, splashing the ceiling. Instantaneously, the ceiling, walls, and floor all turn a swirling violet color. "Huh," she says, watching a whorl of lighter purple dance across the ceiling. "Um, I'm sorry to inform you that you do not meet the entrance requirements for the Fairy Godmothers' Union." When she drops her gaze to meet yours, she looks truly saddened. "Shame. It would have been nice to have another newbie around." She taps a finger on the table as she glances toward the door. In barely more than a whisper, she says, "You do show aptitude for the work, though, so there are other people you can talk to. Some...non-union godmothers." She mouths the words 'non-union' without sound. "I hear there's a new one in the Denver area. She might agree to work with you." She straightens up and says, in a loud, monotone, and very obvious voice, "Please stand, and I will [[escort you outside->RebelEnd]]."

Whether you want to follow her or not, you feel something warm and demanding pressing at your back, pushing you out the door and into the magical hallway beyond. Like it or not, you just became a Union Fairy Godmother. ***** Thank you for playing "So You Want to Be a Fairy Godmother!" If you'd like to know more about the world, you can check out the first ebook of the Reluctant Godmother series, [One Good Wand]<OGW|,(click: ?OGW)[(open-url: "https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01M4K183B")] on Amazon. Peony will be making her "big screen debut" in Book 2 of the series, on its way this fall (fingers crossed!). Questions? Comments? Love it? Bored? Let me know! Stop by my [Facebook page]<FB| (click: ?FB)[(open-url: "https://www.facebook.com/earthgirly")] and leave me a message. Have a sparkly day! ~EarthGirly (writing as Grace McGuiness)

Whether you want to follow her or not, you feel something warm and demanding pressing at your back, pushing you out the door and into the magical hallway beyond. You didn't quite make the cut, but somehow, as you leave the magic behind and enter the shadowed end of the corridor again, you get the feeling that might not be such a bad thing. As you exit headquarters, a frog next to the door clearly croaks, "Ruuuun. Ruuuuun. Ruuuun." ***** Thank you for playing "So You Want to Be a Fairy Godmother!" If you'd like to know more about the world (or Tessa, that other 'non-union godmother'), you can check out the first ebook of the Reluctant Godmother series, [One Good Wand]<OGW|,(click: ?OGW)[(open-url: "https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01M4K183B")] on Amazon. Peony will be making her "big screen debut" in Book 2 of the series, on its way this fall (fingers crossed!). Questions? Comments? Love it? Bored? Let me know! Stop by my [Facebook page]<FB| (click: ?FB)[(open-url: "https://www.facebook.com/earthgirly")] and leave me a message. Have a sparkly day! ~EarthGirly (writing as Grace McGuiness)

You dart out the door and into the magical hallway beyond. Somehow, the green grass and looming trees seem darker now, as if they had been spelled before to be brighter and happier than they really were. A quartet of uniformed men and women - two of them with wings - shout at you to stop, but you ignore them. Through the shadowed corridor and over the receptionist's desk you go, not stopping until you reach the corporate park beyond the building. As you run across the parking lot, you feel a zap of electricity and stumble. When you look back, a giant, protective bubble surrounds the Fairy Godmothers' Union headquarters. A man in a bowler hat approaches you, the umbrella doubling as a cane utterly unnecessary on such a sunny day. He extends to you a business card. "Good afternoon, friend. May I interest you in the opportunity of a lifetime?" The card, in big, bold, green lettering, reads: W.I.C.K.E.D. Realize your power. ***** Thank you for playing "So You Want to Be a Fairy Godmother!" If you'd like to know more about the world (or Tessa, that other 'non-union godmother'), you can check out the first ebook of the Reluctant Godmother series, [One Good Wand]<OGW|,(click: ?OGW)[(open-url: "https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01M4K183B")] on Amazon. Peony will be making her "big screen debut" in Book 2 of the series, on its way this fall (fingers crossed!). Questions? Comments? Love it? Bored? Let me know! Stop by my [Facebook page]<FB| (click: ?FB)[(open-url: "https://www.facebook.com/earthgirly")] and leave me a message. Have a magical day! ~EarthGirly (writing as Grace McGuiness)

*A copy of X-Men #30 falls out of the hat catalogue as you pick it up. Hey, Jean and Scott got married!*

$Rebel $Union $Wicked