Sugarcane

You throw a brick through a side window and hop in. Time to gank some eats. You cut your fingers on the broken glass and suck the wound for hydration. You're in a bathroom. There's some [[cool tunes|cooltunes]] happening on the other side of the [[walls]].\n[[Piss]]\n[[Shit]]\n<<if $visited_party eq "no">>[[Eat]]\n<<else>>\n[[Back to the party|Party]]\n<<endif>>\n<<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>\n

<<set $seconds = $seconds + 2>><<set $shiteater = "no">>\n!!! XTREAM SECONDS GRAB !!!\nUsing the whole carcass is pretty much how the Filthmancer rolls. Taking food-waste and flipping that back into food for another go-round inside your bodymarket gives her a radiant, divine glow. You fall to your knees in awe of her.\n[[I know this.|Filthmancer]]

That's when it hits you. The smell, it hammers through the unique reek of boiling fat and magic smoke from burnt-out processors that comes in puffs from the cracks in the towering concrete edifices. You crouch and Toucan Sam this shit.\n\nYour [[sweet beak|beak]] tells you the smell lives in an incongruous, brokedown [[house across the street|Bathroom]].

<<set $seconds = $seconds + 2>> <<set $canhastape = "no">>\n!!! EXTRAORDINARY SECONDS GET !!!\nVideo James pops the tape in his mouth and Galaga scrolls across his eyes while Gal Gun plays out over his chest. After he's ripped the tape, he bends low and puts it back in the jambox. A pixelplate with a pixelchicken drops from the ceiling and absorbs into your body.\n\n[[Fuck yeah|Party]]\n\n

You poke at the shitbubbles for a while until there aren't any left. They're [[remarkably resilient|bubbledesc]]. You're sad that they're gone, even sadder that they can't be reclaimed or made again. Well, maybe they could but you don't see any straws around. You sure are hungry.\n\n[[Piss]]\n[[Leave this place|Party]]

<<silently>>\n<<set $pissdrinker = "no">>\n<<set $barfeater = "no">>\n<<set $shiteater = "no">>\n<<set $seconds = 0>>\n<<set $dopekicks = "no">>\n<<set $visited_party = "no">>\n<<set $jambox = 0>>\n<<set $canhastape = "no">>\n<<endsilently>>\nFirst thing's first what's twixt yr legs?\n[[Trash|NoReason]]\n[[Treasure|NoReason]]\n[[I just found this somewhere|NoReason]]\n

<<set $shiteater = "yes">> <<set $seconds = $seconds + 1>>\n!!! SECONDS ACHIEVE !!!\nYou dip your paw into the chunky strings of assbarf. You make a fist and come up with noodly strains of greasy shit. The toilet water is rainbow-hued like a gasoline spill. \n[[Lick your fingers clean|Shit]], you radiant sexgod.

<<set $jambox = $jambox + 1>> It's a monstrous thing, this jambox. Extravagant and damaged, the kind of jambox you'd carry around on your shoulder. The kind of jambox that you see in rap videos. There is sound coming out of the jambox. It makes you hungry.<<if $canhastape eq "no">> <<if $jambox lte 1>>Gnarled guitar riffs and high-bpm drumming. Shouted vocals that put pay to the idea of civil discourse, of smiling dissent. You compulsively nod your head even though you can't keep up. Fuck yeah.<<endif>><<if $jambox eq 2>>The Demonfuckers were one of those seminal grindcore bands. They knew it too - copies of their debut album purportedly came with a vial of the vocalist's semen, but when you drank yours one bored afternoon, it was just icing. It was The Day Punk Died for you.<<endif>>\n<<if $jambox eq 3>>There is an audible clunk and a whirr as the jambox comes to the end of Side A. You lick the clear plastic covering the tape deck, just to feel its vibration. \n<<endif>> <<if $jambox eq 4>>The familiar melodies of Gangsta's Paradise by Coolio begin to issue forth from the speakers. You actually like the song alright, but this trashfeast is already in a real bad way. Someone nearby laughs, high and hysterical. Sounds of breaking glass and stomping. You should probably eject the tape for [[safekeeping]].\n<<endif>>\n[[Fast forward|jambox]]\n[[Rewind]]<<endif>>\n[[Enough. I'm done with this nostalgic tchotchke|Party]]\n<<if $jambox lte 99>>\n[[Eject the tape|NoEject]]\n<<endif>><<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>\n\n\n

Someone has stabbed the rewind button from the jambox. Carved into the floor are the words \n"WE CAN'T EVER GO BACK, [[MOTHERFUCKERS|jambox]]."

The trashfeast is now a thin veneer of filth upon the ramshackle tables. It cannot possibly sustain this level of revelry for much longer. Panic grips you and the weird, non-euclidean urge to reproduce your previous meal is overwhelming. You must [[go back for seconds|seconds]] NO LESS THAN TEN TIMES before you leave this household. In the corner, a [[jambox]] cheerfully churns out staticky distortion. <<if $dopekicks eq "yes">>You stare down at your reconstituted cool sneaks, so valiantly saved from the dustbin for another pass through the market of dopeness and capitalism. A squat monstrosity, drawn by the promise of dope kicks and re-establishing the self-evidence of capitalism, extricates itself from the roiling crowd to stand by your side.<<endif>> <<if $dopekicks eq "no">>Your toes poke through gross, holy socks. Holy shit you're awesome.<<endif>> <<if $canhastape eq "yes">>A weird pixelform ruminates nearby.<<endif>>\n[[TO THE TINKLETORIUM|Bathroom]]\n[[Talk to the Filthmancer|Filthmancer]]\n<<if $dopekicks eq "yes">>[[Talk to the strange, squat being.|squatter]]<<endif>>\n<<if $canhastape eq "yes">>[[Regard the pixelform.|VideoJames]]<<endif>><<if $seconds gte 10>>\n[[AYO FUCK THIS PARTY. I'M OUT.|OUT]]\n<<endif>> \n<<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>\n

<<if $visited_party eq "no">>\nYou'd love nothing more than to eject hot pissings all over the place every damn minute of the day but the curious tug of those smells and sounds in the next room is super-insistent, [[dawg|Bathroom]]. <<endif>><<if $visited_party eq "yes">> You piss in that majestic porcelain mouth. It's too perfectly white, aesthetically battling the tore-up, spraypainted [[walls|pisswalls]]. <<if $barfeater eq "no">>The whiteness makes you [[queasy|Brf]].<<endif>> <<if $pissdrinker eq "no">>The piss makes you [[thirsty|Drnk]].<<endif>>\n[[Shit]]\n[[Look around|Bathroom]]\n<<endif>><<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>

Good. [[Great|Sidewalk]]. \nOh, no reason. I was just curious.

<<set $jambox = 100>>\n<<set $canhastape = "yes">>\nYou quick jack the tape and [[pocket it|jambox]].

The pixelform is comprised of tiny red, blue and green dots. It comes off as, like, super-powerful. It eyes the clickety-clack cassette tape bulge in your pocket. Its joints are powerups, its voice is like a furious bro-dude shrieking inchoate racial slurs.\n[[Hook Video James up with your tape|VideoJames2]]\n[[Mingle|Party]] <<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>

<<set $seconds = $seconds + 2>> <<set $barfeater = "no">>\n!!! ULTRA SECONDS ACHIEVE !!!\nUsing the whole carcass is pretty much how the Filthmancer rolls. Taking food-waste and flipping that back into food for another go-round inside your bodymarket gives her a radiant, divine glow. You fall to your knees in awe of her.\n[[Word|Filthmancer]].

Hey, it's your favourite person, the Filthmancer. You both exchange a complicated-looking fistbump that causes several bystanders to overdose on terrific. She'll magic up some seconds for you if you can only give her some primo filth.\n<<if $barfeater eq "yes">>[[Barf up barf|Barfmancy]]<<endif>>\n<<if $shiteater eq "yes">>[[Barf up shit|Shitmancy]]<<endif>>\n<<if $pissdrinker eq "yes">>[[Barf up piss|Pissmancy]]<<endif>>\n[[Back|Party]]\n<<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>

Back for Seconds

Robot Parking

<<set $visited_party = "yes">>\nRoom's fit to bust. Real live ghostfolk freaking everywhere, souls rotting from the corners of their mouths like ectoplasm stalactites. Trashbuffet party in full swing. Dumpster refugee feast stretched wall-to-wall. All the ghosts at this party they're into drama and Ginsberg and Lemon-Lime Bacardi. You get [[20,000 leagues on the trashbuffet|Party]]. Tentacle grabhands with wild abandon, garbage sustenance hoovered in 4 plays of Napalm Death's "You Suffer."\n

You bust down the front door of the house and it kicks off its hinges. You make an obscene gesture over your shoulder and trudge-dance on down the block, forever the dopest of the dope set. \n\n[[Really? That's it?|GFY]]\n[[Wanna play this shit-ass game again?|TrueStart]]\n

<<set $seconds = $seconds + 2>> <<set $pissdrinker = "no">>\n!!! GOD FUCKING SHIT YEAH !!!\nUsing the whole carcass is pretty much how the Filthmancer rolls. Taking food-waste and flipping that back into food for another go-round inside your bodymarket gives her a radiant, divine glow. You fall to your knees in awe of her.\n[[No bigs.|Filthmancer]]

You palpate the table with ghostly tonguetricks. No luck. The trashfeast cannot extend itself indefinitely and this makes you feel awful. It makes you feel empty. It makes the need for seconds so much more [[unbearable|Party]].

Some gorgeous crudely-drawn genitals adorn the walls. Vaginas drawn with only a hazy understanding of how they work, penises with peeholes deep and black enough that they could be portals to another world. In one instance, some fine artist had jammed a thin glass rod directly into a dark krylon peehole. It glittered prettily in the sun cascading off your broken window. You recognize some dope lyrics from a grindcore band you like:\n"WHAT YOU RENDERING\nWHAT YOU RENDERING\nWATCH YOUR RENDERING\nWATCH YOUR [[RENDERING|Bathroom]]"

What? You wanted an ending that's more profound? Something easier to digest or somehow reinforce your life decisions? The fuck am I? Your dad? [[Go fuck yourself|OUT]].

Iridescent rainbow schnoz. Like the ones they have in [[rap videos|goddamn]].

<<set $dopekicks = "yes">>And I mean those are some dope kicks you just found in that dumpster. You're in the industrial part of town, rendering farms and animal processing plants pressing in around you like a Godflesh song. You, you're trudge-dancing gracefully on the cracked concrete like some majestic techno viking with a bass drum trigger where your heart oughta be. \nDope fuckin' kicks, though. I mean [[goddamn]].

body { background-color: magenta }\n\n.passage {\n font-size:3em; \n text-shadow: #888 0 0 0.05em;\n}

It's wearing a nametag that just reads, "Fucko." It leers at your dope new sneaks with a whole head made of teeth. Whenever it opens its mouth an audio rip of a porno soundtrack plays. I bet it's got tricks. I bet it's got a whole mountain of trashfood hiding somewhere. I bet any deal with it would be super legit.\n\n[[Give Fucko your footcovers|Fucko]]\n[[Turn your heel on this weirdlinger|Party]]\n

<<set $seconds = $seconds + 2>> <<set $dopekicks = "no">>\n!!! SECONDS EXCHANGE ARRANGED !!!\nIts chitters sound like clitrubs as you untie your sweet sneaks. It barfs up a whole rack of fine-ass filth. Your mouth just explodes with [[saliva|Party]].

A hissing heathen slaps your claw away from the eject button.\n[["FUCK YOU."|jambox]]\n

"Probably the mucous," you say to the [[empty room|playful]].

<<set $barfeater = "yes">> <<set $seconds = $seconds + 1>>\n!!! SUPER RIDIC SECONDS GET !!!\nYou stick your whole fucking head in that white abyss and motorboat all the barf in there. Eventually, there's no more barf to be had, [[you glorious fucker|Piss]] you.

You scoop up a clawful of dat viscous yellow. It runs through the gaps between your fingers and kinda gets everywhere. Warm ammonia ambrosia sluices through your craw and your skin goosepimples like soapy eggflesh.\n\nYOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS.\n<<set $pissdrinker = "yes">>\n<<set $seconds = $seconds+1>>\n[[Word|Bathroom]].\n<<if $visited_party eq "yes">>\n<<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>>\n<<endif>>

Too muffled and distorted to tell. High BPM, guitars, shouting. Your stomach [[grumbles|Bathroom]].

Hey, fuck you. What'd that barf ever do to you? This trashfeast won't keep itself going if you're just gonna look some gift seconds in the mouth. Y'know what? Yeah, FLUSH THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD, [[asshole|TrueStart]].

You yield to the sexy nausea that animates your super-awesome form. It's always there like a constant, creepy hug from an old friend. There it is. All that dope food, just hanging out in the sublimely befouled toilet.\n\n[[LET'S GET ALL RAP VIDEO IN HERE|Brfeat]]\n[[FLUSH THE WHOLE FUCKIN' WORLD AWAY|Flush]]\n

<<if $visited_party eq "no">>\nYou'd love nothing more than to eject hot pissings all over the place every damn minute of the day but the curious tug of those smells and sounds in the next room is super-insistent, [[dawg|Bathroom]].<<endif>><<if $visited_party eq "yes">>\nYour ass barfs thin, stringy gruel from its depths. What a waste. There is no toilet paper. The water is now alarmingly bubbly. It makes you a little [[playful]].<<if $shiteater eq "no">> My god that buttrecipe you just made is [[tantalyzing|shiteat]].<<endif>>\n[[Piss]]\n[[Look around|Bathroom]]\n<<endif>>\n<<if $visited_party eq "yes">> <<print ($seconds gt 10 ? "YOU HAVE GONE BACK FOR SECONDS ENOUGH, HONKY. GET THE FUCK OUT" : "FIND MORE HELPINGS" )>> <<endif>>\n\n