Damon L. Wakes' Stuck-in-a-Library Simulator

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You are stuck in a library. Not stuck as in trapped - the door's right there - it's just that you have nowhere else to be for an hour and this place has swivel chairs and WiFi. There has to be something you can do to pass the time... [[Make self-referential Twine game.|home]] [[Don't.]]

You (if: (history:) contains "Don't.")[ABSOLUTELY DO ] make a self-referential Twine game. (display: "game image") Time to stick some options in this bad boy. { (unless: (history:) contains "Ask staff for login info.")[ [[Connect to sweet, sweet WiFi.]] ](else:)[<del>Connect to tremendously inconvenient academic WiFi.</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Do it anyway.")[ [[Spin around on swivel chair.]] ](else:)[<del>Oof! Knee pain!</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Read that stuff." and "Read other stuff." and "Pick up that one book you can just see hiding underneath the shelf.")[ [[Examine nearby books.]] ](else:)[<del>Examine nearby books.</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Eat emergency backpack food.")[ [[Eat emergency backpack food.]] ](else:)[<del>Eat emergency backpack food.</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Do something more productive with your time.")[ [[Do something more productive with your time.]] ](else:)[<del>Do something more productive with your time.</del>] }{ }(if: (history:) contains "Ask staff for login info." and "Do it anyway." and "Read that stuff." and "Read other stuff." and "Pick up that one book you can just see hiding underneath the shelf." and "Eat emergency backpack food." and "Do something more productive with your time.")[ Oh, geez. You've totally run out of ideas for things to include in this game, but you've still got $minutes minutes left to kill. Uh... [[Random button mashing.]]]

Under the circumstances, I think you //know// that's not how this thing goes. [[Pick again.|start]]

Yeah, you don't have the password for that. [[Ask for password.]] [[Do something else.|home]]

That's generally frowned-upon. [[Do it anyway.]] [[Actually, don't.|home]]

This shelf is all conspiracy theory stuff. (display: "books image") { (unless: (history:) contains "Read that stuff.")[ [[Read that stuff.]] ](else:)[<del>Read that stuff.</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Read other stuff.")[ [[Read other stuff.]] ](else:)[<del>Read other stuff.</del>] } { (unless: (history:) contains "Pick up that one book you can just see hiding underneath the shelf.")[ [[Pick up that one book you can just see hiding underneath the shelf.]] ](else:)[<del>Ignore that one book you can just see hiding underneath the shelf. I couldn't be bothered to take another photo.</del>] } [[Do something else.|home]]

Yeah, no. That's long gone. (display: "food image") You think you'd be writing some stupid Twine game if you still had the option of boredom-eating? [[Think again, genius.|home]]

You write another little snippet of something important, but now you're stuck. Not stuck-stuck - we've been over this - but unable to make any significant progress. [[Do something else.|home]]

Okay, it's actually a university library, so it's not just a password. You need a username and whatnot for that eduroam thing. [[Ask staff for login info.]] [[Do something else.|home]]

Okay, yeah, see, you're also not a student here. You haven't been for a while. You're not sure you should even be in here. You definitely shouldn't make people aware of your presence via the internet. Basically, shhhhhhhhh... (display: "shhh image") [[Don't draw attention to yourself.|home]]

Ow, my knee! ...I mean your knee. Whatever. We're not doing that again. [[Don't do this again.|home]]

(display: "ufo book image") { (unless: (history:) contains "Read other stuff.")[ No. ](else:)[Also no.] } [[Pick again.|Examine nearby books.]]

(display: "css book image") { (unless: (history:) contains "Read that stuff.")[ No. ](else:)[Also no.] } [[Pick again.|Examine nearby books.]]

Looks fun. (display: "lost book image") You're glad you spotted that. You'd hate to think there might be a student out there who really needs it for their course but can't- (display: "multi-books image") Oh. Well, you're still counting that as your good deed for the day. [[Feel warm glow of satisfaction.|Examine nearby books.]] [[Despair that this counts as an achievement for you.|Examine nearby books.]] [[Both.|Examine nearby books.]]

{ (set: $minutes to 61) }

{ (text-colour: "grey")[ (if: $minutes > 1)[(set: $minutes to it - 1)] (else:)[(set: $minutes to 0)(unless: (passage:)'s name is "end")[(goto: "end")]] $minutes minute(unless: $minutes is 1)[s] remaining. ] } ---

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(if: (history:) contains "home")[You've done it!!! (display: "end image") You've wasted some time.(unless: (history:) contains "Random button mashing.")[ ''In fact, you wasted time so effectively that you didn't even use up all the options. Good job. Give yourself a pat on the back. You sure earned it.''] Was that a boring experience? Did you stick with it for any reason other than to get to the end? Yup. That's the point. //Special thanks to the University of Winchester for not kicking me out of the library while I was doing this. (Turns out former students and the public are actually allowed in, but still thanks all the same.)// ~THE END~](else:)[Hoping for some kind of secret ending if you waste all your time NOT making a self-referential Twine game? Tough. There isn't one. ~THE END~]

Click this thing a few times: [[(either: "Clicky-clicky!", "Click.", "Clickaroonie!", "This thing.", "What satire!", "Fun.", "Finely-crafted simulator gameplay!!!!1!", "Steamed hams.", "Clickety-click!", "Click here to claim your free iPod!", "Library funtimes!", "Click here to claim your FIFTY free iPods!", "INSERT WITTY LINK OPTION HERE", "YOUR JOKE HERE", "-1 minute", "It's Bee Movie, but every time you click this thing it uses up a minute and also it's not Bee Movie at all. I lied.", "50 Things You Need To Click To Progress Through This Game - You Won't BELIEVE Number $minutes!", "Twiddle thumbs.", "Have you seen the secret ending yet?", "This game has become surprisingly linear, huh?", "A winner is you.", "All your clicks are belong to us.", "I can haz click?", "Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Linky!", "A thing you can click.", "This is a link.", "If you can make a better game, I'd like to see it.", "Make like a ballpoint and click!", "Still beats Candy Crush.", "This link intentionally left unclicked.", "Highly strategic gameplay LOL.", "Random button mashing.", "You'd think these would be really easy to write but actually I keep forgetting to add commas between link items in Twine and it makes it a real chore.", "I like turtles.", "Check it out! It's Gandalf: <|:-)>>>>>>>>>", "One link to rule them all.", "Just $minutes more to go!", "$minutes clickable links on the wall, $minutes clickable liiiiiiinks!", "Who's that Pokémon? It's Clickitung!" )|Random button mashing.]]