RPO Thingy

Name: $CharacterName Level: $LevelNumber Reputation: $RepNumber Humor: $HumorNumber Cool: $CoolNumber Maturity: $MatNumber Inventory: $Inv --- (if: $InternetAccess is true)[{ }[[Open your Grail Diary|Open your Gunter diary]]{ }(if: $ClassOver is true)[ [[Do your homework]]] Browse the net: [[Visit the Hatchery|HatcherySite01]] [[Visit Arti's blog|ArtiSite01]] [[Warez site]]]

{(set: $CharacterName to "Wade Watts") (set: $RepNumber to 5) (set: $HumorNumber to 5) (set: $CoolNumber to 5) (set: $MatNumber to 5) (set: $Class to false) (set: $HFollows to false) (set: $Inv to (a: "Laptop")) (set: $GoToBasement to false) (set: $Where to "Aunt's PlacePre") (set: $InternetAccess to false) (set: $ClassOver to false) (set: $SecondClue to false) (set: $TombOfHorrors to false) (set: $ArtiCheck to false) (set: $SoftwareCheck to false) (set: $LudusCheck to false) (set: $GetTicket to false) (set: $LevelNumber to 3) }Everyone your age remembers where they were and what they were doing when they first heard about the contest. It started with James Halliday’s death. He was the videogame designer responsible for creating the OASIS, a massively multiplayer online game that had gradually evolved into the globally networked virtual reality most of humanity now used on a daily basis. The unprecedented success of the OASIS had made Halliday one of the wealthiest people in the world. James Halliday had no heirs. [[Oh snap!|Intro02]]

[[Visit the Hatchery|HatcherySite01]] [[Visit Arti's blog|ArtiSite01]] simple description Warezhouse ^Get the scanning software

You go to your favorite Warez site, a website to download various software and othe things. (if: $SoftwareCheck is true)[There isn't anything here to help you get to the tomb of horrors. (Display: "The Return Key")](else:)[(if: $TombOfHorrors is true)[(if: $LudusCheck is false)[You can search for a piece of landscape that matches the Tomb of Horrors. If you only knew what planet to search. Any landscape search would take a while, so you might as well not start until you have some idea.](else:)[You do a quick search to find a high-end image-recognition plug-in for the OASIS atlas. Once you download the software via Guntorrent, it takes you a few more minutes to figure out how to make it scan the entire surface of Ludus. You plug in the specifics for a hill with large black stones arranged in a skull-like pattern. One with a size, shape, and appearance that matched the illustration from the Tomb of Horrors module. After about ten minutes of searching, the software highlighted a possible match.(set: $SoftwareCheck to true) [[Where is it?|Where01]]]]](if: $SoftwareCheck is false)[ (Display: "The Return Key")]

These things can be acessed at any point during the game. If you click them now, you'll have to hit the return button to get back to the game. in the finished version, I'll fix this. [[Open your Grail Diaray|Open your Gunter diary]] [[Internet access]] [[Browse Diary]] [[Do your homework]] Surf the internet [[Visit the Hatchery|HatcherySite01]] [[Visit Arty’s Missives|ArtiSite01]] [[Warez site]] ^Get the scanning software [[The Scoreboard|the Scoreboard]]

a flashlight, an iron shortsword, a small bronze shield, and a suit of banded leather armor

Anytime throughout the first part, you can flip through your diary and it will list out the clues you get. the thing about learning Tomb of horrors etc. you can ponder various clues. if you ponder the learning thing, you get the realization about Ludis. after pondering the tomb of horrors you can download the mapping software. if you know about ludis and have the software, you can scan for it. after scanning, you can start making plans to get there. [[get to there]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")[[Anorak’s Almanac]] The First Clue: Three hidden keys open three secret gates Wherein the errant will be tested for worthy traits And those with the skill to survive these straits Will reach The End where the prize awaits [[About the first clue|The First Clue]] (if: $SecondClue is true)[The Second Clue: The Copper Key awaits explorers In a tomb filled with horrors But you have much to learn If you hope to earn A place among the high scorers [[About the Second Clue|The Second Clue]] (if:$TombOfHorrors is true)[ You think the second clue refers to the D&D Adventure, The Tomb of Horrors [[About the Tomb of Horrors|Your Notes About the Limerick]]](else:)[ [[Your Notes About the Limerick]]]](else:)[ [[The Second Clue]]] (Display: "The Return Key")

(display: "Status Wrapper")In Halliday's video will, he gave this enigmatic messege to start off the hunt: Three hidden keys open three secret gates Wherein the errant will be tested for worthy traits And those with the skill to survive these straits Will reach The End where the prize awaits [[Return to Diary]] (Display: "The Return Key")

(display: "Status Wrapper")About four years ago, you found a second clue hidden in Anorak’s Almanac. Scattered throughout the text of the Almanac were a series of marked letters. Each of these letters had a tiny, nearly invisible “notch” cut into its outline. There turned out to be one hundred and twelve of these notched letters scattered throughout the book. By writing them down in the order they appeared, You discovered that they spelled something: The Copper Key awaits explorers In a tomb filled with horrors But you have much to learn If you hope to earn A place among the high scorers You weren't the first Gunter to find this. A six months after you found it, some loudmouth named Steven Pendergast, revealed this discovery to the press. This clue has come to be known as the Limerick Since then every Gunter's been really quiet about any furthur information they have discovered. (set: $SecondClue to true) [[Your Notes About the Limerick]] [[Return to Diary]] (Display: "The Return Key")

About four years ago, you found a second clue hidden in Anorak’s Almanac. Scattered throughout the text of the Almanac were a series of marked letters. Each of these letters had a tiny, nearly invisible “notch” cut into its outline. There turned out to be one hundred and twelve of these notched letters scattered throughout the book. By writing them down in the order they appeared, You discovered that they spelled something: The Copper Key awaits explorers In a tomb filled with horrors But you have much to learn If you hope to earn A place among the high scorers You weren't the first Gunter to find this. A six months after you found it, some loudmouth named Steven Pendergast, revealed this discovery to the press. This clue has come to be known as the Limerick Since then every Gunter's been really quiet about any furthur information they have discovered.

(display: "Open your Gunter diary")

The Hatchery’s site interface is designed to look and operate like an old pre-Internet dial-up bulletin board system, complete with the screech of a 300-baud modem during the log-in sequence. Very cool. [[]]

Anorak’s Almanac, a collection of hundreds of Halliday’s undated journal entries. The Almanac is over a thousand pages long, but it containes few details about Halliday’s personal life or his day-to-day activities. Most of the entries are his stream-of-consciousness observations on various classic videogames, science-fiction and fantasy novels, movies, comic books, and ’80s pop culture, mixed with humorous diatribes denouncing everything from organized religion to diet soda. [[The First Clue]] [[The Second Clue]] [[Return to Diary]] (Display: "The Return Key")

The Hunt has been consuming your life for five years now. You, and gunters like you, all dream of what it would be like to win.

(display: "Status Wrapper")This is the blog of a gunter named Art3mis. She's your favorite gunter blogger. She posts these great rambling essays about her search for Halliday’s egg, which she called a “maddening MacGuffin hunt.” She writes with an endearing, intelligent voice, and her entries are filled with self-deprecating humor and witty, sardonic asides. She also has links to the books, movies, TV shows, and music she was currently studying as part of her Halliday research. You assume that all of these posts are filled with misdirection and misinformation, but they are still highly entertaining. It goes without saying, you have a massive cyber-crush She hasn't writen any posts since the last time you checked. (Display: "The Return Key")

(display: "Status Wrapper")You spend a few minutes scanning the most recent message threads, taking in the latest gunter news and rumors. You don't see much of interest this morning. The usual gunter clan flame wars. Ongoing arguments about the “correct” interpretation of some cryptic passage in Anorak’s Almanac. High-level avatars bragging about some new magic item or artifact they’d obtained. In the absence of any real progress, gunter subculture had become mired in bravado, bullshit, and pointless infighting. It's sad, really. You do check out your favorite theads bashing the "Sixers" (Display: "The Return Key")

(display: "Status Wrapper")About the Sixers (Display: "The Return Key")

You hold your breath as you place the close-up image from the Ludus map beside the illustration from the D&D module. The shape of the hill and the skull pattern of the stones both match the illustration perfectly. You decrease the magnification on the map a bit, then pull back far enough to confirm that the northern edge of the hill ended in a cliff of sand and crumbling gravel. Just like in the original Dungeons & Dragons module. You let out a triumphant yell that echoes in (if: $Where is "PostCampus")[the empty classroom](if: $Where is "BasementAfter")[the Basement] and bounced off the walls of your tiny hideout. You've done it. You have actually found the Tomb of Horrors! When you finally manage to calm down, you do some quick calculations. The hill is near the center of a large amoeba-shaped forest located on the opposite side of Ludus, over four hundred kilometers from your school. Your avatar can run at a maximum speed of five kilometers an hour, so it would take you over three days to get there on foot if you ran nonstop the entire time. If you could teleport, you could be there within minutes. The fare wouldn’t be much for such a short distance, maybe a few hundred credits. Unfortunately, that is still more than your current OASIS account balance, which is a big fat zero. The Tomb is hidden less than seventy kilometers from Aech’s school, you could ask him for a ride, but you would have to lie about why you need it. Unless you can think of something else. (display: "The Return Key")

A while back, you were thinking about the second line in the second clue. In a tomb filled with horrors Halliday was an avid Dungeons and Dragons player. In fact, he met his future business partner, Ogden Morrow, as part of his D&D group. Furthur research led you to the Tomb of Horrors, a classic D&D Adventure writen by Garry Gigax himself. You began to develop a theory: Somewhere in the OASIS, Halliday had re-created the Tomb of Horrors, and he’d hidden the Copper Key inside it. But you don't know where...

And just like that, the search for Halliday’s Egg was on. The Hunt, as the contest came to be known, quickly wove its way into global culture. Everybody wanted to be an Egg Hunter(Gunter for short). Everybody dreamed of finding the Egg. And what they would do with the billions upon billions. [[Of course|Intro04]]

Halliday had prepared a short video message, along with instructions that it be released to the world media at the time of his death. This video would be his last will and testament. In the video, Halliday explains that before his death he created his own Easter egg, and hid it somewhere inside the OASIS. The first person to find the Easter egg will inherit his entire fortune. And gave this message as a clue Three hidden keys open three secret gates Wherein the errant will be tested for worthy traits And those with the skill to survive these straits Will reach The End where the prize awaits [[Cryptic|Intro03]]

(set: $SecondClue to false) (set: $TombOfHorrors to false) (set: $ArtiCheck to false) (set: $SoftwareCheck to false) (set: $GetTicket to false)

Double-click this passage to edit it.

(display: "Status Wrapper")A while back, you were thinking about the second line in the second clue. In a tomb filled with horrors Halliday was an avid Dungeons and Dragons player. In fact, he met his future business partner, Ogden Morrow, as part of his D&D group. Furthur research led you to the Tomb of Horrors, a classic D&D Adventure writen by Garry Gigax himself. You began to develop a theory: Somewhere in the OASIS, Halliday had re-created the Tomb of Horrors, and he’d hidden the Copper Key inside it. (set: $TombOfHorrors to true) (if: $LudusCheck is false)[But you don't know where...](else:)[You now think it's somewhere here on Ludus.] [[Return to Diary]] (Display: "The Return Key")

[[Anorak’s Almanac]] The First Clue: Three hidden keys open three secret gates Wherein the errant will be tested for worthy traits And those with the skill to survive these straits Will reach The End where the prize awaits [[About the first clue|The First Clue]] (if: $SecondClue is true)[The Second Clue: The Copper Key awaits explorers In a tomb filled with horrors But you have much to learn If you hope to earn A place among the high scorers [[About the Second Clue|The Second Clue]] (if:$TombOfHorrors is true)[ You think the second clue refers to the D&D Adventure, The Tomb of Horrors [[About the Tomb of Horrors|Your Notes About the Limerick]]](else:)[ [[Your Notes About the Limerick]]]](else:)[ [[The Second Clue]]]

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(display: "Status Wrapper")You twist out of the reach of her cracked nails. She grumbles and leaves with a huff. She's going to get her boyfriend to make you hand it over. You could fight him off, if you were a completely different person. [[Just hand it over went he gets here|Hand it over]] [[Wipe it and hand it over|wipe it and hand it over]] [[Climb out the window|climb out window]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it - 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")While she's gone, you climb out the window. She'll be pissed at you when you come back, but you'll have to worry about that later. At least you keep your laptop. You lose cool for running from your problems [[Go to hideout02]]

{(Set: $Inv to it - (a:"Laptop"))}(display: "Status Wrapper")Hitting a few keystrokes while she's gone, you enact a program to wipe your laptop's memory. It's next to worthless now. But your aunt doesn't know this. When her boyfriend comes back with her, you hand over the brick. She at least thinks she won, and get off your back for a while. You lose your laptop. (Don't worry, you have backups at your hideout) [[Go to hideout02]]

it to look like a large suburban rec room, circa the late 1980s. Old movie and comic book posters covered the wood-paneled walls. A vintage RCA television stood in the center of the room, hooked up to a Betamax VCR, a LaserDisc player, and several vintage videogame consoles. Bookshelves lined the far wall, filled with role-playing game supplements and back issues of Dragon magazine.

(display: "Status Wrapper")The walls, floor, and ceiling are all covered with Styrofoam egg cartons and pieces of carpeting in an effort to soundproof the van. Several cardboard boxes of busted laptops and computer parts sit in the corner, next to a rack of old car batteries and a modified exercise bike you’ve rigged up as a recharger. The only furniture is a folding lawn chair. You drop your backpack, shrug off your coat, and hop on the exercise bike. Charging the batteries is usually the only physical exercise you get each day. You pedal until the meter says the batteries have a full charge, then sit down in your chair and switch on the small electric heater you kept beside it. You open the rat-proof metal box where you keep your food cache and take out some bottled water and a packet of powdered milk. You mix these together in a bowl, then dump in a generous serving of Fruit Rocks cereal. Once you have wolfed it down, you retrieve an old plastic Star Trek lunch box you kept hidden under the van’s crushed dashboard. Inside are your school-issued OASIS console, haptic gloves, and visor. (set: $Where to "Hideout01")(set: $InternetAccess to true) [[Slip on OASIS gear and login]]

(display: "Status Wrapper") Introduction to the concept "it's the year 2040 blah blah blah." "The oasis, a video game created by Haliday has become the defacto way to acsess the internet blah blah blah." "haliday dies and his will states that the person who finds his easter egg will get is fortune. blah blah. It's been five years blah blah You are Wade LASTNAME, a young Egg hunter (Gunter for short) and you are about to find the first key. Description of waking up in aunts trailer. Aunt busts in, notices the laptop, and demands it [[Hand it over]] [[Refuse]] Hand it over -laptop -rep -cool wipe it and hand it over -laptop climb out window -cool [[Go to hideout02]]

{(set: $CharacterName to "Parzival") (set: $Where to "PreClassHall") (set: $InternetAccess to true) (Set: $Inv to it + (a:"a flashlight, an iron shortsword, a small bronze shield, and a suit of banded leather armor")) }(display: "Status Wrapper") As you log into the OASIS you are placed where you were when you logged out last, standing in the hallway of your virtual highschool. Many people go to school, work, and do all of their socialization in the OASIS. All of the OASIS schools are on the Planet Ludus, a server made for students. Here there is no Player-Vs-Player killing, profanity, or other adult interactions. You touch your locker door and it pops open with a soft metallic click. The inside is sparsely decorated. A picture of Princess Leia posing with a blaster pistol. A group photo of the members of Monty Python in their Holy Grail costumes. James Halliday’s Time magazine cover. You reach up and tap the stack of textbooks on the locker’s top shelf and they vanish, then reappear in your avatar’s item inventory. Textbooks acquired Your first class of the day is starting soon. A messege pops up in the corner of your interface. Your friend Aech has invited you to join him in his private chatroom called The Basement [[Go to class|Got to class]] [[Enter the Basement|Enter the basement]]

{(set: $Where to "InClass") (set: $InternetAccess to true) (set: $MatNumber to it + 1) (set: $Class to true) }(display: "Status Wrapper")When you arrive in your World History classroom, several students are already seated at their desks. Their avatars all sit motionless, with their eyes closed. This is a signal that they were “engaged,” meaning they are currently on phone calls, browsing the Web, or logged into chat rooms. You take a seat at your desk. You gain Maturity for meeting your expected responsibilities You have some time to kill before class starts, you can surf the web, read your gunter diary, or just generally do whatever. [[wait for class to start]] [[Enter the Basement|Enter the basement]]

You quietly wait for class to start. (display: "class starts")

{(set: $RepNumber to it + 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")“I was doing you a favor by making you watch it, noob,” you say, “You’ll thank me one day. Wait and see. Ladyhawke is canon.” You gain Reputation for defending your choice in movies “Surely, you must be joking,” Aech says. There is no way Ladyhawke is canon. I guarantee it.” “Where’s your proof, dipshit? And don’t call me Shirley.” “Canon” was the term we used to classify any movie, book, game, song, or TV show of which Halliday was known to have been a fan. “The man had taste. That’s all the proof I need.” “You must be stoned!” You shout. “Ladyhawke was directed by Richard fucking Donner! The Goonies? Superman: The Movie? You’re saying that guy sucks?” “I don’t care if Spielberg directed it. It’s a chick flick disguised as a sword-and-sorcery picture. The only genre film with less balls is probably freakin’ Legend. Anyone who actually enjoys Ladyhawke is a bona fide USDA-choice pussy!” "Oh, so I’m a pussy? You’re the one with the Ewok fetish!” “Don’t start on the Endorians again, man,” he say, holding up an index finger. “I’ve warned you. I will ban your ass. I swear.” This is a hollow threat, and you are just about to respond when a shout from the door draws your attention. [[Oh no|Aholeguy defend]]

{(set: $InternetAccess to false)}(display: "Status Wrapper")Your view of the (if: $Class is false)[hallway](else:)[classroom] shrinks from the limits of your peripheral vision to a small thumbnail window in the lower right of you display, allowing you to monitor what is in front of your avatar. The rest of your field of vision is now filled with the interior of Aech’s chat room. Aech programmed it to look like a large suburban rec room, circa the late 1980s. Old movie and comic book posters cover the wood-paneled walls. A vintage RCA television stands in the center of the room, hooked up to a Betamax VCR, a LaserDisc player, and several vintage videogame consoles. Bookshelves line the far wall, filled with role-playing game supplements and back issues of Dragon magazine. Hosting a chat room this large isn’t cheap, but Aech can afford it. He makes quite a bit of dough competing in televised PvP arena games after school and on the weekends. Aech is one of the highest-ranked combatants in the OASIS, in both the Deathmatch and Capture the Flag leagues.(if: $ArtiCheck is true)[ He is even more famous than Art3mis. ] Aech himself is sprawled on one of the chat room’s three couches, which are arrayed in a U-shape in front of the TV. Aech’s avatar is a tall, broad-shouldered Caucasian male with dark hair and brown eyes. You asked him once if he looked anything like his avatar in real life, and he’d jokingly replied, “Yes. But in real life, I’m even more handsome.” As you walk over, he glances up from the Intellivision game he is playing. His distinctive Cheshire grin stretches from ear to ear. “Z!” he shouts. “What is up, amigo?” He likes to give people single-letter nicknames. Aech pronounces his own avatar’s name just like the letter “H.” [[Aech! My man!|NoH Responce]] [[What up, Humperdinck?|BookResponce]] [[José, how's it hanging?|Jose Responce]]

{(set: $Where to "PostClass")}(if: $Class is false)[(set: $CoolNumber to it - 1)(display: "Status Wrapper")As you return from the Basement, a warning messege flashes across your screen, telling you that you are late for your first class. You quickly navigate to your first classroom and slip into your desk as the bell rings your tardines. You lose Cool for running through the hallways like a doof. ](else:)[(display: "Status Wrapper")Your avatar's eyes slide open, and you are back in your World History classroom. The seats around you are now filled with other students, and your teacher, Mr. Avenovich, is materializing at the front of the classroom.] Going to school in the OASIS is much preferable to many people. Not only can you attend school anywhere with an internet connection. Your classes can be things impossible in the real world. For your World History lesson this morning, Mr. Avenovich loads up a stand-alone simulation so that your class can witness the discovery of King Tut’s tomb by archaeologists in Egypt in AD 1922. All of your teachers are pretty great. Unlike their real-world counterparts, most of the OASIS public school teachers seem to genuinely enjoy their job, probably because they don’t have to spend half their time acting as babysitters and disciplinarians. The OASIS software takes care of that, ensuring that students remain quiet and in their seats. All the teachers have to do is teach. The rest of your classes for today are relitively uneventful. [[Lunchtime|Lunchtime01]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")As you enter the basement, a messege apears on the screen. "Hey friends and hangers on! I'm out doing something. It's probably awesome. But I might be availiable to hang out later. So feel free to relax here if you like." You can hang out here or return to your school. (set: $Where to "BasementAfter") [[Log out of Basement|AfterSchool Campus]](if: $SoftwareCheck is true)[ [[Ask Aech for a ride|Ask H for a ride]] ]

You get the ticket like in the book [[To the Tomb]]

{}(if: $SoftwareCheck is true)[As you wonder the hallways, you notice an activities board and you have an epiphany. Each OASIS public school had a bunch of different athletic teams, including wrestling, soccer, football, baseball, volleyball, and a few other sports that couldn’t be played in the real world, like Quidditch and zero-gravity Capture the Flag. Students went out for these teams just like they did at schools in the real world, and they played using elaborate sports-capable haptic rigs that required them to actually do all of their own running, jumping, kicking, tackling, and so on. The teams had nightly practice, held pep rallies, and traveled to other schools on Ludus to compete against them. Your school gave out free teleportation vouchers to any student who wanted to attend an away game, so you could sit up in the stands and root for old OPS #1873. You’ve only taken advantage of this once, when your Capture the Flag team had played against Aech’s school in the OPS championships. Scanning the Activities board you find what you are looking for. This evening, your football team is playing an away game against OPS #0571, which is located roughly an hour’s run from the forest where the tomb is hidden. You reach out and select the game, and a teleportation voucher instantly appears in your avatar’s inventory, good for one free round-trip to OPS #0571. You stash your textbooks in your locker. And, Giddy with excitement, you run to the nearest teleportion terminal. [[Let's go to the Tomb]] ](else:)[(display: "Status Wrapper")You wonder about the campus. But there isn't anything you can do here. (display: "Do Stuff After")]

[[Get the ticket]] +cool +rep like in the book [[Ask H for a ride]] +mat -rep

(set: $InternetAccess to false)You can only grab this if you're at school. things will play out like in the book. [[To the Tomb]]

(set: $InternetAccess to false)(display: "Status Wrapper")You swallow your pride and call up Aech. “Hey Harry,” You say when he answers. “What’s up Z?” “I was wondering if you could give me a ride to your school.” “Really why?” You and Aech usually keep your important Gunter Research close to the chest. You two are both solo for a reason. "Remember when I visited for that Capture the Flag game?" You come up with a lie. "I kinda met a girl. She was cool, but we didn’t trade contact information. I wanted to have a look around and maybe meet again.” “Right now? Schools out buddy.” “Yeah, but she said she’s part of one of those after school clubs.” “What’s her name?” Aech doesn't sound suspicious, just cruious “She didn’t tell me; we were playing coy." You clear your thoat. "If you’re busy I totally understand.” “Hey you know me, I’m mister Wingman. You want help picking up a fly honey, I got your back." His avatar winks. "I got a Tournament match in a little, but I swing by and pick you up beforehand. But you’ll be on your own for a while.” “You’re the best, man.” “No problem. And if things fall through with the girl, we can swing by the basement for a Space Marathon. Sound good?” “Sure.” A few minutes later, Aech picks you up in the Halo wraith he won in a tournament las t year. It isn’t his favorite ride, but it gets good gas mileage. [[Next|Ride H02]]

An aberviated version of the tombs stuff. If I had time, I would recreate several parts of the actual Tomd of Horrors. but since the book doesn't go into detail, niether will I. you confront the lich. play joust and loose. [[switch sides]] +Cool +Rep +win [[Try harder]] +Rep +lose [[Try to cheat]] -rep -cool -mat +lose

{(set: $LevelNumber to 10)(Set: $Inv to it + (a: "Copper Key")) (set: $RepNumber to it + 10) (set: $CoolNumber to it + 10) }(display: "Status Wrapper")“Actually, would you mind if we switched sides? I’m used to playing on the left.” It is true. When Aech and you played in the Basement, you always took the ostrich side. Being on the right side during the first game had screwed up your rhythm a bit. Acererak appears to consider your request for a moment. Then he nods. “Certainly,” he says. He steps back from the cabinet and you switched sides. It worked. You slip into the zone, and the tide began to turn in your favor. You begin to find the flaws in the lich’s playing style, the holes in his programming. You die several times in the process, but you finally take him down during the tenth wave, with no extra lives of your own to spare. “Good game,” Acererak says. Then, to your surprise, he offers me his withered claw of a hand. you shake it. “Yeah,” you reply. “Good game, man.” Acererak once again produces two quarters and drops them into the Joust machine. “This one is for all the marbles,” he says. “Art thou ready?” Your final tie-breaking game lasts longer than the first two combined. During the final wave, so many buzzards filled the screen that it is hard to move without getting dusted by one of them. The lich and you face off one final time, at the very top of the playing field, both of you incessantly hitting our Flap buttons while slamming our joysticks left and right. Acererak made a final, desperate move to avoid your charge and drops a micrometer too low. His final mount dies in a tiny pixelated explosion. “Congratulations, Parzival,” he says, bowing low. “You played well.” “Thank you, noble Acererak,” you reply, the lich transforms into a tall human wizard dressed in flowing black robes. You recognize him immediately. It is Halliday’s avatar, Anorak. Now,” the wizard says, speaking with Halliday’s familiar voice. “Your reward.” [[Next|switch sides02]]

{ (set: $RepNumber to it + 1) }(display: "Status Wrapper")You try really hard to beat the lich, but he's just too much for you. You gain Reputation for playing to the best of your abilities "well," he says. "looks like you lost." "Yeah." you say and sigh. The lich reachs up and touches your sholder. You die. [[Respawn|out of the tomb01]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it - 1) (set: $RepNumber to it - 1) (set: $MatNumber to it - 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")Most places in the OASIS run a version of a physics engine. it allows various real world type interactions with gravity. Just as you start playing your second game, you position your foot behind the lich's leg. Just as he's about to win the first round, you kick out his legs from under him. His dry and broken corpse body falls apart as you kick his legs away. Unfortunetly, his top half continues to play. He quickly kills your jouster then turns his attention to you. "You dare to try and cheat?" "It was an acident!" You lose Reputation, Cool, and Maturity for trying to cheat. The undead king is having none of your shit. He raises a hand to smite you. Luckily, He's struggle to hold up the top half of his body on the Joust cabinet. and as he tries to take unsteady aim, you run out of the room. [[Run!|out of the tomb01]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You exit the tomd at speed, bnot daring to look back to see if the Lich is following you, either by runing on his hands or popping his legs back on. Even though having your avatar doesn't run doesn't tax you at all, you are panting heavily when you reach the surface. you peer back into the tunnel just to check. "oh geez, that was a bad idea." you hear a clearing throat behind you and turn around. (if: $GetTicket is true)[ [[Turn Around|Arti at the end cheat]]](else:)[ [[Turn Around|Aech at the end cheat]]]

Here it ends

(display: "Do Stuff After") [[Browse Diary]] [[Get teleportation ticket]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You spend your lunch period sitting in one of the green fields bordering the school, staring at the simulated scenery while you munch on a protein bar with your visor on. It beats staring at the inside of your hideout. You are a senior, so you’re allowed to go off-world during lunch if you wanted to, but you didn’t have that kind of spare dough to blow. Logging into the OASIS is free, but traveling around inside it isn’t. Most of the time, you didn’t have enough credits to teleport off-world and get back to Ludus. When the last bell rang each day, the students who had things to do in the real world would log out of the OASIS and vanish. Everyone else would head off-world. A lot of kids own their own interplanetary vehicles. School parking lots all over Ludus were filled with UFOs, TIE fighters, old NASA space shuttles, Vipers from Battlestar Galactica, and other spacecraft designs lifted from every sci-fi movie and TV show you can think of. Every afternoon you stand on the school’s front lawn and watch with envy as these ships filled the sky, zooming off to explore the simulation’s endless possibilities. The kids who didn’t own ships would either hitch a ride with a friend or stampede to the nearest transport terminal, headed for some offworld dance club, gaming arena, or rock concert. But not you. You aren’t going anywhere. You are stranded on Ludus, the most boring planet in the entire OASIS. The OASIS is a huge place, with all sorts of Planets devoted to various fandoms and industries. You could adventure through any fantasy or scifi world from any movie, or just hang out on original vistas created by users. But you are stuck on Ludus, the most boring planet in the entire OASIS. Created when the OASIS first launched, the only thing to be found here are thousands of identical school campuses separated by rolling green fields, perfectly landscaped parks, rivers, meadows, and sprawling template-generated forests. There are no castles, dungeons, or orbiting space fortresses for your avatar to raid. And there are no NPC villains, monsters, or aliens for you to fight, so there is no treasure or magic items for you to plunder. [[Oh Well|Afterschool]]

{(set: $InternetAccess to true)(set: $Where to "PostCampus")(set: $ClassOver to true)}(display: "Status Wrapper") Your classes for the day are over. most of the other students are leaving for the day. But you have no after school job or anything to do in the real world. So you stay logged in and on Ludus. You can wander around the empty campus or surf the web or whatever. Looking in the corner of your interface, you can see that Aech left the Basement open for anyone on his list that wanted to go hang out there. (display: "Do Stuff After")

“How many times have you seen that sapfest?" Aech says. "I know you’ve made me sit through it at least twice.” He is baiting you now. He knows Ladyhawke is one of your guilty pleasures, and that you've seen it over two dozen times. [[Defend Ladyhawk]] [[Joke about Ladyhawk as well]] [[Shrug it off]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it + 1) (set: $HumorNumber to it + 1) }(display: "Status Wrapper")"Well how else are you going to understand Ferris Bueller, until you see his ancestor fight evil wizards in the prequel? Trust me, it makes the Matthew Broderick expanded universe make much more sense." You gain Humor and Cool for responding with a joke. Aech bursts into laugher and you follow suite. "And where does Wargames fit into this 'series'" Aech make air quotes, grinning the whole while, "is it a prequel too?" "Well it came out first so technically not a prequel, just the first in the series. You see, after the events of Wargames, David Lightman gets moved into the witness protection program and they change his name to Farris Beuller. You can tell because no real person would name their child Farris." Aech laughs again. "You're an idiot." "Trust me, once you see the whole catalog, you’ll have an all new appreciation for The Cable Guy.” [[Start explaining Inspector gadget lore|Aholeguy Joke]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it + 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")"He we like what we like. Matthew Broadrick is annoyingly funny, and even you got to admit, Michelle Pfeiffer is hot." "I hear that." Aech fistbumps you. "I love the Battle for Endor, and Wilfred Brimley is only half as hot as Michelle." You both laugh. [[Goodtimes|Aholeguy Shrug]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Hey!” A total lamer by the name of I-rok yells out, descending the stairs towards you and Aech. I-rok and Aech attend the same school and have a few classes together, but you still can’t figure out why Aech had granted him access to the Basement. I-rok fancies himself an elite gunter, but he is nothing but an obnoxious poseur. Sure, he does a lot of teleporting around the OASIS, completing quests and leveling up his avatar, but he doesn’t actually know anything and worse of all he thinks that he does. “Are you cocks arguing about Star Wars again,” He brandishes a plasma rifle the size of a snowmobile. “That shit is so played out, yo.” “If you want to ban someone, Aech," You say, "why don’t you start with this clown?" "Shut your hole, Penis-ville!” I-rok replies, using his favorite mispronunciation of my avatar’s name. “He doesn’t ban me ’cause he knows I’m elite!" "You're a Poseur is what you are." [[Next|Ahole setup]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Hey!” A total lamer by the name of I-rok yells out, descending the stairs towards you and Aech. I-rok and Aech attend the same school and have a few classes together, but you still can’t figure out why Aech had granted him access to the Basement. I-rok fancies himself an elite Gunter, but he is nothing but an obnoxious poseur. Sure, he does a lot of teleporting around the OASIS, completing quests and leveling up his avatar, but he doesn’t actually know anything and worse of all he thinks that he does. “Are you cocks arguing about Star Wars again,” He brandishes a plasma rifle the size of a snowmobile. “That shit is so played out, yo.” “What's the matter, I-rok? Don't like the complex worldbuilding of the Broadrickverse?” “Shut your hole, Penis-ville!” I-rok replies, using his favorite mispronunciation of your avatar’s name. "This coming from the chump is so broke that he has to bum rides to Greyhawk, just so he can kill kobolds for copper pieces." "I had to find some kobolds to talk to after riding with you. Just to get the scent of Poseur out of my clothes." [[Next|Ahole setup]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Hey!” A total lamer by the name of I-rok yells out, descending the stairs towards you and Aech. I-rok and Aech attend the same school and have a few classes together, but you still can’t figure out why Aech had granted him access to the Basement. I-rok fancies himself an elite Gunter, but he is nothing but an obnoxious poseur. Sure, he does a lot of teleporting around the OASIS, completing quests and leveling up his avatar, but he doesn’t actually know anything and worse of all he thinks that he does. “Are you cocks arguing about Star Wars again,” He brandishes a plasma rifle the size of a snowmobile. “That shit is so played out, yo.” “Why are you waving that thing around?” You point to the rifle. “You can’t hurt anyone in a chatroom so it isn’t threatening.” “Shut your hole, Penis-ville!” I-rok replies, using his favorite mispronunciation of your avatar’s name. "This coming from the chump is so broke that he has to bum rides to Greyhawk, just so he can kill kobolds for copper pieces." "What are you even trying to achieve?" you say, crossing your arms. "You butt into other people's conversations just to act like a prick and a Poseur." [[Next|Ahole setup]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“OK. Let’s see who the real poseur is,” he says. “Check this out, girls.” Grinning, he produces an item from his inventory and holds it up. It is an old Atari 2600 game, still in the box. He purposefully covers the game’s title with his hand, but you recognize the cover artwork anyway. It is a painting of a young man and woman in ancient Greek attire, both brandishing swords. Lurking behind them is a minotaur and a bearded guy with an eye patch. “Know what this is, hotshot?” I-rok says, challenging you. “I’ll even give you a clue.… It’s an Atari game, released as part of a contest. It contained several puzzles, and if you solved them, you could win a prize. Sound familiar?” (display: "Aholeguy")

[[Knock him down]] [[Humor him]] [[Ignore him]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“You’re joking, right?” You say. “You just now discovered the Swordquest series?” I-rok deflates. “You’re holding Swordquest: Earthworld,” You continue. “The first game in the Swordquest series. Released in 1982.” You smile wide. “Can you name the next three games in the series?” He narrows his eyes. He is, of course, stumped. “Fireworld, Waterworld, and Airworld,” Aech answers. “Bingo!” You say, and you both bump fists again. “Although Airworld was never actually finished, because Atari fell on hard times and canceled the contest before it was completed.” I-rok flips you both the bird. “If you two fags already knew about the Swordquest contest, how come I’ve never once heard you mention it?” “Come on, I-rok,” Aech says, shaking his head. “Swordquest: Earthworld was Atari’s unofficial sequel to Adventure. Every gunter worth their salt knows about that contest. How much more obvious can you get?” “Fine. You win,” I-rok says. “But you both obviously need to get a life.” “And you,” you say, “obviously need to find a new hobby. Because you clearly lack the intelligence and commitment to be a gunter.” I-rok turned and walked over to the long boxes of comic books stacked on the other side of the room, as if he’d lost interest in the discussion. “Whatever,” he said over his shoulder. “If I didn’t spend so much time offline, getting laid, I’d probably know just as much worthless shit as you two do.” You gain Reputation for defending your position amung Gunters. [[class starts]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it + 1) (set: $MatNumber to it + 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")"Anyone can read a Gunterpedia article about the swordquest series," you say. Before I-rok can respond, you mute him and turn to Aech. "I gotta get to class. Stay cool." You and Aech exchange nods and you exit the chatroom. You gain Cool and Maturity for ignoring the taunts of I-rok. [[class starts]]

{(set: $CoolNumber to it + 1) }(display: "Status Wrapper")"Well, that's part of the Swordquest series. Did you learn something cool about them?" I-rok goes into a long stream of misremembered information about the series, much is left out and much more is inncorect. The whole, while you listen patiently, nodding your head. After he finishes, plastering a smug look on his face, he pops the cartrage into his inventory again. "That was very interesting I-rok. Although you might want to double check some of those sources. Being critical of your sources is inportant in research." "Lick me Penis-ville. Don't act like you know shit." "If you say so." You raise your hands in a placating manner. "I got to get to class now." You gain Cool for keeping yours. You fist bump Aech one last time and exit the chatroom. [[class starts]]

(if: $LudusCheck is false)[The only homework you need to do is for your latin class. (display: "Latin Homework") ](else:)[You just figured out that quite possibley, you are standing on the same Planet as the Copper key. You are too excited to do homework! (Display: "The Return Key") ]

You start your work for you Latin class. You are given a sentence in English and tasked with properly congiating it in Latin. (if: $SecondClue is true)[You are rather bored, filling out the sections when it hits you. We go to school to learn Petimus scholam ut litteras discamus Wait a minute, "To Learn"! The third line of the Limerick "But you have much to learn" Who has much to learn? Students! All of the OASIS schools are on the OASIS Ludus.(set: $LudusCheck to true) (if: $TombOfHorrors is true)[The Tomb of Horrors, and by extention the Copper Key is on the same server as your school. You just need to know how to find it!](else:)[ The Copper Key is somewhere on this server! But Where!]](else:)[You fill in a few examples but are too bored to deal with it right now you set it aside for later.] (Display: "The Return Key")

{(set: $CoolNumber to it - 1) (set: $RepNumber to it - 1) }(display: "Status Wrapper")Aech cocks his head to the side. "You ok man? feeling under the weather." You lose Cool and Reputation for forgetting an inside joke. "Yeah I'm fine," you try to bruush it off. "Or maybe you were up all night bawling your eyes out to Ladyhawke." Aech chuckles. (display: "Buildup to ladyhawke")

{(set: $RepNumber to it + 1) (set: $HumorNumber to it + 1) }(display: "Status Wrapper") “What up, Humperdinck?” you say. You gain Reputation and Humor for remembering an inside joke. You flop onto the couch with him. Just over his sholder you notice a copy of Starlog on the shelf behind him with a picture of Rutger Hauer on the cover. “Can I have a copy of that Starlog?” you say. “What, so you can read all about Ladyhawke?” Aech replies (display: "Buildup to ladyhawke")

{(set: $HumorNumber to it + 1)}(display: "Status Wrapper")"José, how's it hanging?" Aech chuckles, "Not techincally an H, but I'll allow it." "Hose-a doesn't start with an H? What about Hose-b?" You gain Humor for cracking jokes. "Or maybe your brains are all scrambled from watching too much Ladyhawke." Aech chuckles. (display: "Buildup to ladyhawke")

the Scoreboard (Display: "The Return Key")

{(if: $Where is "PreClassHall")[ [[Back|Hallway01]] ](if: $Where is "InClass")[ [[Back|Classroom Waiting]] ] (if: $Where is "PostCampus")[ [[Back|AfterSchool Campus]] ] (if: $Where is "BasementAfter")[ [[Back|Go to the Basement]] ] }

When the first anniversary of Halliday’s death arrived, the fervor surrounding the contest began to die down. An entire year had passed and no one had found anything. Not a single key or gate. Another year passed. And another. Still nothing. The general public lost all interest in the contest. Halliday’s Easter egg gradually moved into the realm of urban legend, and the ever-dwindling tribe of gunters gradually became the object of ridicule. And another year went by. [[And another|Intro5]]

Then, on the evening of February 11, 2045, an avatar’s name appeared at the top of the Scoreboard, for the whole world to see. After five long years, the Copper Key had finally been found, by an eighteen-year-old kid living in a trailer park on the outskirts of Oklahoma City. That kid was you. Dozens of books, cartoons, movies, and miniseries have attempted to tell the story of everything that happened next, but every single one of them got it wrong. So let us set the record straight, once and for all. [[Wake up|Intro06]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You are Wade Watts, 18-year-old loser and solo Gunter. You have no clan and seek the egg on your own. You awake in your aunt’s trailer to the sound of gunfire, but ignore it. Gunfire is common in The Stacks. To while away the couple hours before dawn, you boot up your laptop and play some Robotron: 2084 and watch some Family Ties. You are halfway through the fourth episode of my Family Ties mini-marathon when the laundry room door creaks open and your aunt Alice walks in, a malnourished harpy in a housecoat, clutching a basket of dirty clothes. She looks more lucid than usual and notices your laptop. “Hand it over, Wade,” she orders, reaching for the laptop. “I can pawn it to help pay our rent.” “No!” You shout, twisting away from her. “I need it for school.” “Everyone else around here has to pay rent. I’m tired of you leeching off of me!” “You keep all of my food vouchers.” She reaches out again [[Hand it over]] [[Refuse]]

You slip on your OASIS visor, pop on your haptic gloves, and say your passphrase. “You have been recruited by the Star League to defend the Frontier against Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada.” Across your eyes, the login sequence for the OASIS streams. Identity verification successful. Welcome to the OASIS, Parzival! Login Completed: 07:53:21 OST–2.10.2045 As this text fades away, it is replaced with the standard greeting all OASIS players see. READY PLAYER ONE [[Log into oasis]]

After climbing down the stacks of trailers, vans, and mobile homes that make up your trailer park. you scurry along the ground level until you make it to your hideout. it's a half destroyed van hidden among the various other trash here in the Stacks. you pop open the back door and hop inside.

{(set: $RepNumber to it - 1) (set: $CoolNumber to it - 1) (Set: $Inv to it - (a:"Laptop"))}(display: "Status Wrapper")You mumble and hand over the Laptop. You lose Cool for caving You lose Reputation for caving You lose your laptop. (Don't worry, you have backups at your hideout) [[Go to your hideout|Go to hideout02]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")After climbing down the stacks of trailers, vans, and mobile homes that make up your trailer park. you scurry along the ground level until you make it to your hideout. it's a half destroyed van hidden among the various other trash here in the Stacks. you pop open the back door and hop inside. [[Inside|Go to hideout]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")As you log into the OASIS you are placed where you were when you logged out last, standing in the hallway of your virtual highschool. Many people go to school, work, and do all of their socialization in the OASIS. All of the OASIS schools are on the Planet Ludus, a server made for students. Here there is no Player-Vs-Player killing, profanity, or other adult interactions. You touch your locker door and it pops open with a soft metallic click. The inside is sparsely decorated. A picture of Princess Leia posing with a blaster pistol. A group photo of the members of Monty Python in their Holy Grail costumes. James Halliday’s Time magazine cover. You reach up and tap the stack of textbooks on the locker’s top shelf and they vanish, then reappear in your avatar’s item inventory. Textbooks acquired Your first class of the day is starting soon. A messege pops up in the corner of your interface. Your friend Aech has invited you to join him in his private chatroom called The Basement [[Got to class]] [[Enter the Basement|Enter the basement]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You have some time to kill before class starts, you can surf the web, read your gunter diary, or just generally do whatever. [[wait for class to start]] [[Enter the Basement|Enter the basement]]

{(set: $InternetAccess to true)(set: $Where to "PostCampus")}(display: "Status Wrapper")Your classes for the day are over. most of the other students are leaving for the day. But you have no after school job or anything to do in the real world. So you stay logged in and on Ludus. You can wander around the empty campus or surf the web or whatever. Looking in the corner of your interface, you can see that Aech left the Basement open for anyone on his list that wanted to go hang out there. (display: "Do Stuff After")

(set: $InternetAccess to false)(display: "Status Wrapper")(set: $GetTicket to true)After teleporting to OPS #0571 and running to the border of the school grounds you pause for a moment. You switch off your avatar name from being read by other players. You'd rather that nobody notice that you don't go to any of the schools near here. You start running out into the empty wilderness, across a rolling green field that stretches out behind the school. A small mountain range looms in the distance, and you can see the amoeba-shaped forest at its base. You turn on my avatar’s autorun feature, then equip your armor, shield, and sword You are almost to the edge of the forest when your phone rings. The ID says it is Aech. But if you answer the call, he will see a live video feed of your avatar, running across a field at top speed, with OPS #0571 shrinking in the distance behind you. So you let the call roll to you vidmail. Aech’s face appears in a small window on my display. He is calling from a PvP arena somewhere. “Yo, Z! What are you up to? Jerking off to Ladyhawke?” He flashes his Cheshire grin. “Give me a shout. I’m planning to pop some corn and have a Spaced marathon. You down?” He hangs up and his image winks out. You send a text-only reply, saying you have a ton of homework and can’t hang tonight. [[The Tomb of Horrors|Entering the tomb01]]

Double-click this passage to edit it.

(display: "Status Wrapper")“In the far reaches of the world, under a lost and lonely hill, lies the sinister TOMB OF HORRORS. This labyrinthine crypt is filled with terrible traps, strange and ferocious monsters, rich and magical treasures, and somewhere within rests the evil DemiLich.” A lich is an undead creature, usually an incredibly powerful wizard or king who had employed dark magic to bind his intellect to his own reanimated corpse, thus achieving a perverted form of immortality. You have encountered liches in countless videogames and fantasy novels. They were to be avoided at all costs. You study the map of the tomb and the descriptions of its many rooms. The tomb’s entrance is buried in the side of a crumbling cliff. A tunnel leads down into a labyrinth of thirty-three rooms and chambers, each filled with a variety of vicious monsters, deadly traps, and (mostly cursed) treasure. If you somehow managed to survive all of the traps and find your way through the labyrinth, you would eventually reach the crypt of Acererak the Demi-Lich. The room was littered with treasure, but if you touched it, the undead King Acererak appeared and opened up a can of undead whup-ass on you. If, by some miracle, you managed to defeat the lich, you could take his treasure and leave the dungeon. Mission accomplished, quest completed. If Halliday had re-created the Tomb of Horrors just as it is described in the module, you are in big trouble. Your avatar is a third-level wimp, with nonmagical weapons and twenty-seven measly hit points. Nearly all of the traps and monsters described in the module could kill you easily. And if you somehow managed to make it past all of them and reach the crypt, the ultrapowerful lich could kill your avatar in seconds, just by looking at him. But you have a few things going for you. First, You really didn’t have much to lose. If your avatar is killed, you would lose your sword, shield, and leather armor, and the three levels you’ve managed to gain over the past few years. I’ll have to create a new first-level avatar, which will spawn at your last log-in location, in front of your school locker. But then you could just return to the tomb and try again. And again and again, every night, collecting XPs and increasing in levels until you finally figured out where the Copper Key was hidden. [[Next|Entering the tomb02]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")Your other advantage (you hope) is that you know exactly what to expect once you enter the tomb, because the module provides you with a detailed map of the entire labyrinth. It also tells you where all the traps are located, and how to disarm or avoid them. You also know which rooms contain monsters, and where all of the weapons and treasure are hidden. Unless, of course, Halliday had changed things around. Then you are screwed. But at the moment, you are far too excited to be worried. After all, you’ve just made the biggest, most important discovery of your life. You are just a few minutes away from the hiding place of the Copper Key! You finally reach the edge of the forest and run inside. You climb up onto the low hilltop, and it is like stepping into the illustration from the D&D module. Halliday had reproduced everything exactly. Twelve massive black stones were arranged on the hilltop in the same pattern, resembling the features of a human skull. By consulting the module map, you are able to locate the exact spot in the cliff where the entrance to the tomb is supposed to be buried. Then, using your shield as a shovel, you begin to dig. After a few minutes, you uncover the mouth of a tunnel that led into a dark underground corridor. You move the Tomb of Horrors dungeon map to the top right corner of your display, strap your shield to your back, take out your flashlight, and clutching your sword in your other hand, you enter the Tomb of Horrors. [[Next|Entering the tomb03]]

{(Set: $Inv to (a:)) (Set: $Inv to it + (a:"Bag of Holding, +1 Flaming Sword, A Gem of Seeing, A +1 Ring of Protection, and +3 Full Plate armor")) (set: $LevelNumber to 6) }(display: "Status Wrapper")So far, everything has followed the original module to the letter. If the same is true for the rest of the tomb, you might be able to survive long enough to locate the Copper Key. There are only a few monsters lurking in this dungeon—a gargoyle, a skeleton, a zombie, some asps, a mummy, and the evil demi-lich Acererak himself. Since the map tells you where each of them is hiding, you should be able to avoid fighting them. Unless, of course, one of them is guarding the Copper Key. And you can already guess who probably had that honor. I tried to proceed carefully, as if I had no idea what to expect. You begin to make your way through the dungeon, room by room. Even though you know where all of the traps are located, you still have to proceed carefully to avoid them all. In a dark, forbidding chamber known as the Chapel of Evil, you find thousands of gold and silver coins hidden in the pews, right where they are supposed to be. It is more money than your avatar can carry, even with the Bag of Holding that you found. You gather up as many of the gold coins as you can and they appear in my inventory. The currency is automatically converted and your credit counter jumps to over twenty thousand, by far the largest amount of money you’ve ever had. And in addition to the credits, your avatar receives an equal number of experience points for obtaining the coins. As you continued deeper into the tomb, you obtain several magic items along the way. A +1 Flaming Sword. A Gem of Seeing. A +1 Ring of Protection. You even find a suit of +3 Full Plate armor. These are the first magic items your avatar has ever possessed, and they make you feel unstoppable. [[Next|Entering the tomb04]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")The farther you go, the more confident you become. The tomb’s layout and contents continue to match the module description exactly, down to the last detail. That is, until you reach the Pillared Throne Room. It is a large square chamber with a high ceiling, filled with dozens of massive stone columns. A huge raised dais stands at the far end of the room, atop which rests an obsidian throne inlaid with silver and ivory skulls. All this matches the module description exactly, with one huge difference. The throne was supposed to be empty, but it isn’t. The demi-lich Acererak is sitting on it, glaring down at you silently. You walk across the chamber to the foot of the dais You take a deep breath, raise your sword, and place your right foot on the bottom step of the dais. As you did, there is a sound like cracking bones as Acererak slowly lifts his head “Greetings, Parzival,” he says in a rasping voice. “What is it that you seek?” “I seek the Copper Key,” you reply. Then you remember you are speaking to a king, so you quickly bow my head, drop to one knee, and add, “Your Majesty.” “You shall prove your worth by facing me in a joust!” He replies. [[Next|Entering the tomb05]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")He waves a skeletal hand at his throne. There is a brief flash of light, accompanied by a transformation sound effect. The throne melts and morphs into an old coin-operated videogame cabinet. Two joysticks protrud from its control panel, one yellow and one blue. You can’t help but grin as you read the name on the game’s backlit marquee: JOUST. Williams Electronics, 1982. “Best two out of three games,” Acererak rasps. “If you win, I shall grant you what you seek.” Joust was a classic ’80s arcade game with a strange premise. Each player controls a knight armed with a lance. Player One is mounted on an ostrich, while Player Two is mounted on a stork. You flap your wings to fly around the screen and “joust” with the other player. When you crash into an opponent, whoever’s lance is higher on the screen wins the joust. I hadn’t played Joust in over a year. But you were really good at it. At least, you got good enough to beat aech at it regularly. Acererak manages to kill you twice, before you can get warmed up, mercilessly slamming his winged mount into yours at the perfect trajectory. He handles the game’s controls with the calculated perfection of a machine. Which, of course, is exactly what he is—cutting-edge NPC artificial intelligence, programmed by Halliday himself. He kills off your last man before you even clear 30,000 points. Embarrassing. “One game down, Parzival,” he says, flashing a rictus grin. “One more to go.” [[Next|Entering the tomb06]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Art thou ready?” he inquires again, hunching over the control panel. [[Ask to switch sides|switch sides]] [[Try harder]] [[Try to cheat]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You gleefully exit the tomb, dodging every trap, like it was nothing. as you exit the tomb to turn around to give one last wave, when you jump at the sound of a clearing throat. (if: $GetTicket is true)[ [[Turn Around|Arti at the end won]]](else:)[ [[Turn Around|Aech at the end won]]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Who the hell are you?” Standing behind you is a stocky female avatar with short black hair. As she cokcs her head to the side, you recognize her. It’s Art3mis, your favorite Gunter bloger. For a moment you are too star-struck to speak. “Cat got your tongue?” she asks. "I uh...I'm the guy that just got his ass kicked by a undead gamer." "I can see that. He's quite the piece of work huh?" "Yeah." She holds out her hand. "Artimis." You shake her hand. "I know, I read your blog." "Always nice to meet a fan. At least a fan who isn't being creepy about it." She looks at something you can't see. Problably something on her browser, then turns back to you. "Hey, the midnight server is about to reset. you wanna stick around and see what happens when more than one person challenges him?" "Feeling thourougly embbarrased that you cybersruch just saw you get you ass handed to you, you shake your head. "Nah, I'm kinda tired." "You sure?" artimis asks, "You just died so you could use some loot. Ican kill all the monsters inside and you can keep the loot. Call it a present to a fan." Being a charity case makes you feel worse. "No No. I got a school project in the morning." "Alright. It looks like I've got some competition. and I warn you...?" Without thinking, you say your real name. "Wade" "I warn you Wade, competition brings out the best in me." She smiles and enters the tunnel. [[End]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")To your surprise, instead of respawning at your locker. you find yourself at the enterence of the tomb. You still lose everything in your inventory, and are back to level one. but at least...you still have to walk all the way back to your school. You sigh and start to make plans for the next time, when a you jump at the sound of a clearing throat. (if: $GetTicket is true)[ [[Turn Around|Arti at the end lost]] ](else:)[ [[Turn Around|Aech at the end lost]] ]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“Who the hell are you?” Standing behind you is a stocky female avatar with short black hair. As she cocks her head to the side, you recognize her. It’s Art3mis, your favorite Gunter bloger. For a moment you are too star-struck to speak. “Cat got your tongue?” she asks. “I said: Who. The hell. Are you?” “Greetings,” you say, bowing slightly. “I am Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobos Ramírez.” She smirks. “Chief metallurgist to King Charles the Fifth of Spain?” “At your service,” You reply, grinning. “Cute.” She glances watches your avatar aproximate your panting. "Had a good run? Piss off the Lich?" "Uh, yeah...He thought I was cheating when I acidently tripped, uh on him." "well, you can't out run him." She smirks "Not for long, he will follow you wherever you go. Just wait somewhere you got all the advantages. Get some buffs, maybe a couple friends." She laughs. " and don't wait too long, he keeps moving, even while you're logged out. and the longer he travels, the stronger he becomes." "That's diabolical." "That's what happens when you try to cheet." "Wait, does that mean you tried to cheet?" "no comment." She smiles, "When I say you come out of the tunnel, I was worried. I get three weeks of this place all to myself and now I got comeptition? but by the looks of you, I don't have much to worry about." "Hey, i might not look like much, and I might go for...unorthidox advantages, but that doesn't mean I'm a pushover." She smiles. "Sure, wearing the armor that you get in the tomb. that means your old armor was crap and you can't be above level 14." she looks at something you can't see for a moment. "Look Juan, I was waiting for the midnight reset, but if you want I could kill thel Lich for you. right here right now, before he gets stronger for chasing you. in return, you don't come back here for 3 days. give me some chances to get the first key. deal?" You scoff. "Thanks but no thanks." The sound of bone on stone starts to be audible from the tunnel. "You better start running." she leans against the stone wall of the tunnel. "Remember the turtle and the hare." Thinking better of yourself, you stifle the next comeback and start running. The last thing you hear before art3mis is out of audible range is. "hey there Acey." "Good evening Art3mis." "He went that way." "Oh I know." [[End]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You turn around and meet eyes with Aech. He stands at the tunnel entrance with his arms crossed. “So this is the girl you had your eyes on?” “Oh hey Hellion. How did you-?” “You were acting weird, I thought maybe your girl was catfishing you, so I tagged you with a tracker. After my match, lo and behold, I check the tracker and you had run off school grounds. I was worried, so I followed and I see this thing. Aech points at the tunnel. “I guess I have some explaining to do.” “Save it Z. I don’t care that you found the Tomb and wanted to go it alone. I care that you lied to me.” Aech shakes his head. “So did you get the copper key?” You briefly consider lying to spare Aech’s feelings, but decide against it. You produce the key from your inventory. “Good, I was just wondering if you would lie again.” Aech opens a browser window and flips it over to you. It displayed the Scoreboard on Halliday’s website. It looked just as it had for the past five years, with one change. Your avatar’s name now appeared at the very top of the list, in first place, with a score of 10,000 points beside it You open your browser window and check your newsfeed headlines just to be sure. Every single one of them contain your avatar’s name. Stuff like: MYSTERIOUS AVATAR “PARZIVAL” MAKES HISTORY and PARZIVAL FINDS COPPER KEY. “looks like you’re famous.” Aech steps past you. “hold onto that feeling, come midnight server reset. I’m gonna be on that board.” Aech clearly doesn’t want to talk to you, and the copper key is burning a hole in your pocket. As you start t oleave, you turn back one last time. “Hey Aech, when you get to the end-“ “AhAH Ah” Aech covers his ears. “I don’t want any hints. Especially from a lying dirtbag.” Sighing, you begin walking back to the school. [[End]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You turn around and meet eyes with Aech. He stands at the tunnel entrance with his arms crossed. “So this is the girl you had your eyes on?” “Oh hey Hellion. How did you-?” “You were acting weird, I thought maybe your girl was catfishing you, so I tagged you with a tracker. After my match, lo and behold, I check the tracker and you had run off school ground. I was worried, so I followed and I see this thing. Aech points at the tunnel. “I guess I have some explaining to do.” “Save it Z. I don’t care that you found the Tomb and wanted to go it alone. I care that you lied to me.” Aech shakes his head. “So did you get the copper key?” "Nope." Aech looks you up and down. "Why are you out of breath?" "I ran into trouble." "Well since you're in no condition to run the Tomb of Horrors, looks like when the midnight server reset comes, I'll be the getting the key first." He peers down the tunnel. "What the hell is that?" You look down the tunnel and see the upper torso of the Lich crawling up the tunnel. "Oh shit!" You turn and run. Just as you crest the hill you hear the lich's voice. "Excuse me sir, I am after the fiend that just tried to cheat a king." "You and me both your majesty." The last thing you hear aech say before you leave earshot is: "Run you lying prick!" [[End]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“I got creamed,” you say. “Joust isn’t really my game.” She relaxs her posture slightly. That seems to be the answer she wants to hear. “Yeah, same here,” she says in a commiserating tone. “Halliday programmed old King Acererak with some pretty wicked AI, didn’t he? He’s insanely hard to beat. I’ve been hitting him twice a day, before and after the midnight server rest, and I’ve barely made progress.” You can feel the copper key buring a hole in your inventory. “Yeah, I better get going.” “Where do you think you’re going?” she says, following you. “Home,” you say. “That lich wiped me out me pretty bad, I need some sleep “I suppose,” she says, studying you. “But you should stick around anyway. Something different might happen if there are two avatars here at midnight. Anorak probably prepared for that contingency. Maybe two instances of the lich will appear, one for each of us to play? Or maybe—” “That’s a really kind offer. But I have to go.” You search for a plausible excuse. “I’ve got school in the morning.” She nods, but her expression shift back to one of suspicion. Then her eyes widen, as though an idea had just occurred to her. Her pupils begin to dart around, focused on the space in front of her, and you realize she is looking something up in a browser window. A few seconds later, her face contorted in anger. [[Next|Arti at the end won03]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“You lying bastard!” she shouts. “You dishonest sack of crap!” She makes her Web browser window visible to you. It displayed the Scoreboard on Halliday’s website. It looked just as it had for the past five years, with one change. Your avatar’s name now appeared at the very top of the list, in first place, with a score of 10,000 points beside it You open your browser window and check your newsfeed headlines just to be sure. Every single one of them contain your avatar’s name. Stuff like: MYSTERIOUS AVATAR “PARZIVAL” MAKES HISTORY and PARZIVAL FINDS COPPER KEY. You stand there in a daze, forcing yourself to breathe. Then Art3mis gives you a shove, which, of course, you don’t feel. She does knock your avatar backward a few feet, though. “You beat him on your first try?” she shouts. You nod. “He won the first game, but I won the last two. Just barely, though. I used to play Joust all the time against a friend of mine. So I’d already had a ton of preparation. I’m sure if you’d had as much practice—” “Please!” she grows, holding up a hand. “Do not patronize me, OK?” She lets out what I can only describe as a howl of frustration. “I don’t believe this! Do you realize I’ve been trying to beat him for five goddamn weeks!” She motions to the window displaying the Scoreboard. “You’re famous now,” she says. “You realize what that means, don’t you?” “I haven’t had much time to think about it yet.” “Well, I have. I’ve been thinking about it for the past five weeks. Your avatar’s name on that Scoreboard is going to change everything. The public will become obsessed with the contest again, just like when it first began. The media is already going berserk. By tomorrow, Parzival will be a household name.” That thought makes you a little queasy. “You could become famous in the real world too,” she says. “If you reveal your true identity to the media.” “I’m not an idiot.” “Good. Because there are billions of dollars up for grabs, and now everyone is going to assume you know how and where to find the egg. There are a lot of people who would kill for that information.” “I know that,” you say. “And I appreciate your concern. But I’ll be fine.” [[Next|Arti at the end won04]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")“I warn you,” she says, switching her browser window off. “Competition brings out the best in me. Now get out of here. Your face is pissing me off.” As you turn to leave, you pause. For some reason you feel compelled to help her, even though you know you shouldn’t. “Try playing on the left side,” you say. “That’s how I won. I think he might be easier to beat if he’s playing the stork.” She stares at you for a second, possibly trying to gauge whether you are messing with her. Then she nodsand heads into the cave. [[End]]

You have reached the end of this simulation Final score Name: $CharacterName Level: $LevelNumber Reputation: $RepNumber Humor: $HumorNumber Cool: $CoolNumber Maturity: $MatNumber Inventory: $Inv Thank you for playing

(display: "Status Wrapper")Aech asks a few questions about the girl while you ride across Ludus. You come up with some decent vague details. Star wars fan, interested in Gunting but hasn’t gotten into it yet, loves Ladyhawke. After he drops you off at his school, he leaves for his tournament. As soo as he’s out of eyeshot, you make your way to the border of the school grounds [[Off we go|Ride H03]]

(display: "Status Wrapper")You switch off your avatar name from being read by other players. You'd rather that nobody notice that you don't go to any of the schools near here. You start running out into the empty wilderness, across a rolling green field that stretches out behind the school. A small mountain range looms in the distance, and you can see the amoeba-shaped forest at its base. You turn on my avatar’s autorun feature, then equip your armor, shield, and sword. [[Next|Entering the tomb03]]

[[Wonder around campus]] [[Go to the Basement]](if: $SoftwareCheck is true)[ [[Ask Aech for a ride|Ask H for a ride]] ]

The chamber fills with the sound of a full orchestra. Triumphant horns were quickly joined by a stirring string section. You recognized the music. It is the last track from John Williams’s original Star Wars score. As the music builds to a crescendo, Anorak stretchs out his right hand. There, resting in his open palm, is the Copper Key, the item for which millions of people had been searching for the past five years. As he hands it to you, the music fades out, and in the same instant, you hear a chime sound. You’ve just gained fifty thousand experience points, enough to raise your avatar all the way up to tenth level. “Farewell, Sir Parzival,” Anorak says. “I bid you good luck on your quest.” You gain a buttload of Reputation and Cool for Winning the first key You find yourself standing alone on the empty dais. You look down at the Copper Key in your hand and feel overcome with wonder and elation. It’s a simple antique copper key, its oval-shaped bow embossed with the roman numeral “I.” You turned it over in your avatar’s hand, watching the torchlight play across the roman numeral, and that is when you spot two small lines of text engraved into the metal. You tilt the key up to the light and read them aloud: “What you seek lies hidden in the trash on the deepest level of Daggorath.” [[Exit a winner]]