<<set $coolcomment = "Nobody really cares."; if ($coolestlife_score >= $cooleststory + 1)\n{\n\t$cooleststory=$cooleststory/2 + $coolestlife_score/2;\n\tif ($coolestlife_score==9 && !($age > 20 && $age < 30 && Math.random()<.3))\n\t{\n\t\t$whocan=["mother says","father says","best friend says", "parents say", "friends say"];\n\t\tif ($age>=50-Math.random()*25) $whocan=["son says", "daughter says", "best friend says", "kids say", "friends say"];\n\t\t$coolcomment="Your "+$whocan[Math.floor(Math.random()*$whocan.length)]+", \s"Aren't you afraid it could have attacked you? You should be more careful!\s"";\n\t}\n\telse\n\t{\n\t\t$respect+=1;\n\t\t$coolcomment="Everyone is impressed. You'll probably keep telling that story for a while!";\n\t}\n}\nelse\n{\n\tif ($respect>0) $respect -= 1;\n\tif ($age<30 && $momcares) { $coolcomment="Your mom says, \s"That's nice, dear.\s""; $momcares-=0.5+Math.random();}\n\telse if ($cooleststory>3) $coolcomment="Your last story was better.";\n}\n>><<print $coolcomment>>
You're underwater.\n\nIt's beautiful down here.
[[~ ~ ~ ~ surface. ~ ~ ~ ~|you died doing what you love ]]\n\n<<iamunderwater>>\n\n<<set $linebreaks="\sn";>><<set while ($linebreaks.length < $depth) {$linebreaks += "\sn";}>><<print $linebreaks>>You see a stunningly beautiful shark up close.\n\nIt eats you.
Undo: off
<<if $depth==0>><<iamathome>>\n\n<<if Math.random()<0.35 or 18 + 30 * Math.random()>$age>>You get a chance to go diving.\n\n[[go swimming.|deeper]]\n\n[[don't.|age]]<<else>>[[okay.|age]]<<endif>><<else>><<if $depth>3 and Math.random()*60<1>><<deathbyshark>><<else>><<if $depth>25 and Math.random()*200<$depth>><<deathbypressure>><<else>>[[~ ~ ~ ~ surface. ~ ~ ~ ~|surface]]\n\n<<iamunderwater>>\n<<set $linebreaks="\sn";>><<set while ($linebreaks.length < $depth) {$linebreaks += "\sn";}>><<print $linebreaks>>You see <<set $aquadeep = Math.min(Math.floor(Math.random()*$aquaticlife.length),Math.floor(Math.random()*Math.min($aquaticlife.length,$depth*3)));\n\nif ($aquadeep >= $coolestlife_score)\n{\n\t$coolestlife_score = $aquadeep;\n\t$coolestlife = $aquaticlife[$aquadeep];\n}\n\n>><<print $aquaticlife[$aquadeep]>>.\n\n<<if $depth>$maxdepth+1+3*Math.random()>>You've never been nearly this deep. You can't bring yourself to go any deeper.<<else>>[[go deeper.|deeper]]<<endif>><<endif>><<endif>><<endif>>
<<if $coolestlife_score>0>>You're at home, still telling the same old story about <<print $coolestlife>>.\n\n<<if $respect<=0>>Everyone's bored of that story.<<endif>><<if $respect>0>>It's old news, but nobody really minds.<<endif>><<if $respect>1>> Everyone still loves hearing about it.<<endif>><<else>>You're at home, and you've never done anything worthwhile.<<endif>>
<<set $respect=$respect*0.95-Math.random()*Math.random(); if ($respect<0) $respect=0; $age += 2 + Math.floor(Math.random()*4);>>Years pass. You are <<print $age>> years old.\n\n<<if 60+30*Math.random()<$age>><<deathbyoldage>><<else>><<if Math.random()*100<1>><<deathbyfluke>><<else>><<omni>><<endif>><<endif>>
<<set $places=["Maldives","the Philippines", "Belize", "Thailand", "Hawaii", "Honduras", "Malaysia", "Indonesia", "Micronesia", "Indonesia", "the islands of Turk & Caicos", "Mozambique", "Thailand", "Australia", "the Great Barrier Reef", "Cozumel", "Mexico", "Australia", "Belize", "Ecuador", "the Galapagos Islands", "the Red Sea", "Egypt", "the Cayman Islands", "Palau", "Micronesia", "Papua", "New Guinea", "the Beqa Lagoon", "Fiji", "Punta Gorda", "Costa Rica"];>><<print $places[Math.floor(Math.random()*$places.length)]>>
<<set if ($maxdepth<$depth) $maxdepth=$depth;>><<if $depth>20 and Math.random()*40 < $depth>><<set $bends=1>><<endif>><<set $agerate-=1>><<set $depth=0>>You swim to the surface and breathe fresh air.\n\nWhen you go home, you tell everyone a story about when you saw <<print $coolestlife>>.\n\n<<thatscool>>\n\n[[return to normal life|age]]
<<set $age=18; $agerate=1; $lossduetoage=0; $depth=0; $maxdepth=0; $momcares=1; $respect=0;\n$aquaticlife = [\n"a fish",\n"some fish",\n"some reefs",\n"a school of fish",\n"a beautiful fish",\n"a strange squid",\n"a clever octopus",\n"a really weird fish",\n"an aggressive octopus",\n"a shark in the distance",\n"an unmarked shipwreck",\n"the largest fish you've ever seen",\n"a hauntingly beautiful coral reef",\n"two fish entwined in a mating dance",\n"a massive school of fish that surrounds you",\n"a really overwhelmingly rare and gigantic squid",\n"the strangest and most alluring sea creature you've ever seen"];\n$coolestlife = "a fish";\n$coolestlife_score = 0;\n$whocan = [];\n>>You are 18 years old.\n\n<<omni>>
<<if $agerate<=1>>A year passes.<<set $agerate=1>><<else>>Years pass.<<endif>><<set $age+=$agerate; $agerate+=2; if ($agerate>6+Math.random()*5) {$agerate -= Math.floor(Math.random()*5);}>> You are <<print $age>> years old.\n\n<<if 60+30*Math.random()<$age>><<deathbyoldage>><<else>><<if Math.random()*100*$agerate<1>><<deathbyfluke>><<else>><<omni>><<endif>><<endif>>
Aquatic Life
But one night, you go to sleep and you never wake up.
[[~ ~ ~ ~ surface. ~ ~ ~ ~|you died doing what you love ]]\n\n<<iamunderwater>>\n\n<<set $linebreaks="\sn";>><<set while ($linebreaks.length < $depth) {$linebreaks += "\sn";}>><<print $linebreaks>>The pressure becomes overwhelming this deep.\n\nIt crushes you.
But one day, you die in a freak accident.\n\nAnd that's it.
<<set $joints=["elbows hurt", "knees hurt", "shoulders hurt", "left shoulder hurts", "right shoulder hurts", "ankles hurt"];>><<print $joints[Math.floor(Math.random()*$joints.length)]>>
<<set if ($depth==0) {$coolestlife=""; $coolestlife_score=0;} $depth+=1;>><<omni>>