You work at a bakery. No, you don't bake anything. You don't have that kind of talent. You just ring people up for their donuts and send them on their way. This is your job.
An elderly gentleman walks in. What do you do?
[[Say "Good Morning"->Said "Good Morning"]]
[[Say nothing->Said Nothing]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
You said to the gentleman "good morning". The man ignored you and went straight to the coffee. You wondered what would have happened if you called him out for being rude. But you don't, you know, ACTUALLY do that, because you don't have the spine.
[[Wait for him to come to the counter->Waited to come to counter]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]The gentleman comes to the counter after what feels like five actual minutes, and he says "Just the coffee".
[[Say nothing and ring him out->Say nothing and ring him out]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
The man left and you continued your day like this, occassionaly getting frustraited at customer incompetence and your own sense of mortality, and you finally get to leave for the day.
[[Go home and go to sleep->Went Home And Went To Sleep]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You went home and slumped into your bed. You browsed videos on Youtube thinking about how you really should get something done, but you can't bring yourself to do anything. You're feeling rather tired.
[[Close eyes and take a nap->Took A Nap]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You took a nap. When you woke up, you found everything exactly as it was. You contemplate going back to work or staying home to catch up on sleep
[[Go to Work->Go To Work]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You decide to go to work. You take the bus and get there just in time. You let out a sigh, staring at yourself in the mirror in the state mandated bathroom. You put on your apron, go to the counter and fake a half smile with all your might.
A gentleman comes into the store.
[[Say "Good Morning"->Said "Good Morning"]]
[[Break down and go insane->Broke down]]
[[Accept your fate->Accept Your Fate]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
You decide to say nothing. Yeah, you know you're supposed to say good morning, but the man clearly doesn't care and you sure don't. Best to leave him be.
[[Wait for the man to come to the counter->Waited to come to counter]]
[[Start a political uprising within the company->Started uprising]]
[[Get together a Jazz Band->Jazz Band]]
[[Go home, because you don't have time for this->Bakers Dozen Route]]
[[Recite Poetry->Poetry Route]]
(if:(history:)contains "Final Boss")[(if:(history:)contains "waiting for the plan to unfold")[(if:(history:)contains "Go To Work")[(if:(history:)contains "Chris at the bridge")[(if:(history:)contains "World Map")[[[A Message from the developer->The Final Route]]]]]]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You go into the back room, assured the customer would take five actual minutes pouring his coffee, to tell your co-worker David about a rumor that the bakers are going on strike. You made up this rumor of course, but minor details. David asks (font:"Courier new")["Where did you hear it from?"]
[[Stan->Heard From Stan]]
[[Barb->Heard From Barb]]
[[Genevera->Heard From Genevera]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Oh, that's not how this is supposed to go. You're supposed to become jaded and emotionless, not break down and go crazy.
I mean, who can blame you though? With all of the problems plauging the world, slowly rotting in a job like this, it's a wonder anyone in your position doesn't go crazy. Some people may enjoy costumer service, understandably, but even they have to admit that they don't want the same boring routine. Maybe it is the systems fault by demanding that baked goods are always ready for indifferent people to consume, ignoring all of the labor and time that went into making the donuts for them. But what's the alternative? Baking it all yourself? Most people do not has time for that as they slave away at their own respective jobs. Most things wouldn't get done (and the stuff that would get done would not be done as well) if we all had to do them ourselevs. Society as a whole would probably collapse. It's hard to see the big picture sometimes, but regardless, maybe you don't want to be a part of that big picture. The world would go on with or without you. How does one even find the will to stay alive knowing that? It's a question you never really can find the answer to. And that's ultimately what caused you to crack.
You're escorted to the asylum and are never heard from again.
[[Wait, I want to do my life over->Intro]] (font:"courier new")["Stan? What does the window washing guy know about the bakers?"]
[[Play it off as a joke->Joking about stan]]
[[No, really, I heard his daughter is friends with Karen->Stans Daughter And Karen]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")["Ha ha yeah I wish there was a strike within the company. It would make things more interesting, dude"]
[[Laugh then go back out to ring the customer out for his coffee->Waited to come to counter]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")["Wow, that's weird. But yeah, hopefully we won't lose our jobs admist all this."]
[[Shrug it off->Shrugged off job loss]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]David nervously agrees with you and you go back to helping the customer. Your day continues to be boring, so we won't go over the details.
The next day you come in and bump into Genevera, the head of the baking staff. You unfold the next part of your uprising.
[[Tell her that the corporate office is spreading rumors of a strike to further their adjenda of making this branch fall apart, which can pave the way for replacing the store with a much more profitable tanning salon and ice cream parlor->Tanning and Ice Cream]]
[[Tell her that her nails look pretty today->Nails look pretty Genevera]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You tell Genevera your story and she doesn't seem to question you. Corporate is sort of a pain in the neck to her, so she'd probably believe it if you told her they wear coats made of kitten skin. She thanks you for the info and goes into baking donuts a little angrier than normal.
You feel committed to starting this uprising, so you might as well go ahead and start the next part while you got 20 minutes before you clock in.
[[Write a letter to the corporate office about your Tanning Salon and Ice Cream Parlor idea, saying its from one of their outsourced research firms->Corporate Letter]]
[[Call your store from the payphone by the gas station pretending that your a construction company. Ask for the manager in charge of large scale demolition, to which they will direct to corporate.->Construction disguse]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You compliment Genevera. Never know, it might help you out.
You tell Genevera your story and she doesn't seem to question you. Corporate is sort of a pain in the neck to her, so she'd probably believe it if you told her they wear coats made of kitten skin. She thanks you for the info and goes into baking donuts a little angrier than normal.
You feel committed to starting this uprising, so you might as well go ahead and start the next part while you got 20 minutes before you clock in.
[[Write a letter to the corporate office about your Tanning Salon and Ice Cream Parlor idea, saying its from one of their outsourced research firms->Corporate Letter]]
[[Call your store from the payphone by the gas station pretending that your a construction company. Ask for the manager in charge of large scale demolition, to which they will direct to corporate.->Construction disguse]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You write the letter and send in the outgoing box to corporate. You're assured that they won't question how it got mixed up in the Store #34 mail, as corporate tends to not really care.
[[Wait and watch your plan unfold->waiting for the plan to unfold]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You call twice a day, with each passing one making the bakers feel less and less secure. You're pretty good at disguising your voice, so it goes over fairly smooth. No one suspects a thing, not even David.
One trip to the gas station reveals a mysterious, folded up twenty dollar bill. Attached is a note that reads:
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[I know it's you. Meet me at Oak No Park by the swings at 3:45 this Sunday]]
[[Meet the person there->Meeting at Oak No]]
[[Decline the offer->waiting for the plan to unfold]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You have accepted that this is all life has to offer you. You resigned to defeat and spent the next forty-five years saying hello to customers and feeling empty inside.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You think about how you used to be in a Jazz band. Fond memories of spending late nights at bars and getting together with friends. You thought that was your purpose in life, before you had to split it up. With the way this job is going, maybe you could give it another shot.
You stealthly pull out your phone while you wait on the customer to get over to you. You want to get back in touch with an old friends.
[[Text Chris->Talk to Chris]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
Yeah, this life is getting boring and you want no part of it. You have always dreamed of just saying "Screw it" and leaving, but you never could bring yourself to do it. Today, you're doing it. Where will you go? What will you do? You don't care. It's your life and you are going to live it how you want.
You leave the bakery and get a little bit down Drexel Avenue when you notice a shadow zip past. It was long and came from behind you, but it moved so quick that you didn't know what shape it was or where it went.
[[Proceed home to figure out a plan for your life->Ignore The Shadow]]
[[Look around a bit->Investigate The Shadow]]You decide to recite some poetry you heard somewhere to yourself. How does it go again...?
[[The Flight Of The Carrier->The Flight Of The Carrier]]
A few days go by. You continue the routine. The days pass and you bide your time, waiting for this shoddy shack of a bakery company to fall before you. The confusion and the anger add up, bakers and clerks alike. Finally, it happens.
You see a conga line of bakers exit the store. The strike has begun.
[[Follow them out->Join the strike]]
[[Pretend to not know what is going on->Ignorant of the strike]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Well, of course you'd want to join the strike you helped create. Without giving it a second thought you followed Genevera and the others outside, leaving David inside the bakery alone.
Things start getting a bit more than hectic. Trees are being tipped over and guns are being tossed out. Yeah, it turns out the dozen of bakers are all very pro second amendment. One lays at your feet.
[[Pick Up The Gun->Picked The Gun Up]]
[[Leave The Gun Alone->Left gun alone]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You feign ignorance. Wouldn't want anyone to catch on, would we?
"What happened?" You ask David.
(font:"courier new")["The bakers are finally doing that strike, of course. Not sure what we should do."]
You see the people you pass every day shouting and tipping over cars like mad men just outside the big window in the front. The police showed up, but the crowd of bakers couldn't be contained.
Suddenly, a grenade lands in the front of the store.
[[Duck!->Survived the grenade]]
[[Stand there like an idiot->Died to grenade]]
[[I wonder what Erie is doing right now->Died to grenade]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You grabbed David and ducked behind the counter as the grenade destroyed the front half of the store. You crawl into the back room, and further back into the now empty baking facility.
(font:"courier new")["What's happening out there?"] David said.
[[Go outside and investigate->Left the bakery]]
[[Stay inside where it is safe->Stay in bakery]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]The grenade exploded and you died. You idiot.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]
(css:"font-size: 250%;")[(text-colour:"red")[(text-style:"outline")[(font:"lucida console")[''THE BAKERS DOZEN'']]]]
A Text Adventure By Nick Miller
[[START->Intro]]
(link:"SAVE GAME")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game Saved!]]
{[(link: "LOAD GAME")[(load-game:"Slot A")]](else:)["No Save Data To Load"]}
[[UPDATE INFO->Update Info]]You wenty outside to see your master plan unfold. But you told David it was to maybe find a way to escape the area.
Outside you see a lot of gunfire and violence that would have traumatized you if you weren't dead inside already. Across the street, you see one of the bakers, Amanda, putting a lot of animals into a truck. You also see a neon pink skinned man dressed in a Zebra patterned bikini reading outloud the entire script to "American Hurrah".
[[Go see Amanda->Amanda's Animals]]
[[Talk to the pink guy->Pink Man]]
[[Go back inside->Stay in bakery]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You decide to stay and wait for a bit, but unfortunately, it didn't really pan out. All the exits eventually collapsed due to the heavy damage from outside enemy fire. You and David are alone in the bakery, and are now trying to survive. You're not sure how long you have been trapped, and have been surviving on the baked goods that you used to so passively take for granted. It's a dark time, and you slowly feel yourself going deeper into your own madness.
You lose a bit of reasoning along your decent into madness. You start looking for a scape goat. Anything to defend your fragile ego from taking any more pain. You know you caused this, but you don't want to accept that. You see the scape goat you were looking for, right in front of you. You are divided between accepting your failure and letting your own mad reasoning take over.
David walks up to you
(font:"courier new")[Hey... Can I tell you something?]
[[Sure, go ahead->listen to David]]
[[No, I need to listen for police sirens->Ignored David]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")["I... I wanted to say how much this means to me that you're here by my side. I would have lost it by now. You've given me the courage to move forward. When we get out of here, I want to stop the rampaging bakers.Those fiends have probably destoryed all of democracy by now. So let's get out of here soon. Okay man?"]
You listen to Davids kind words and something sort of breaks inside of you, grasping the weight of what you did.
[[Give a false Smile and reassuring nod->Kill David]]
[[Genuinely tell him "Thank you"->Rescue David]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You successfully twarted the madness and admitted you were wrong. To yourself, anyway.
David gave a light nod and went back to searching through the building for food, exits, and maybe a toothbrush. You go back to writing letters on bakery parchment paper and sliding them into cracks in the rubble. Most get stuck halfway between the rubble and the outside, so you keep trying various places throughout the building.
[[Try the restroom->Restroom]]
[[Try cookie decorators office->Cookie Decorator Office]]
[[Try the front of the store->Front Of Store]]
[[Try the store room->Store Room]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
David nods back, his confidence in you reassured. But he shouldn't be complacent just yet.
[[Look over at the bread slicer on the ground->kill david 2]]Your words didn't have weight and it hurt David a little bit. But you were focused on not losing your mind, as the thought of killing an eatin David became slowly more and more realisitic. You tried justifying it by telling yourself that he just insulted the bakers, who we should have been grateful towards. You don't really believe it, but you would have to if you wanted to shed off the guilt of what you were thinking of doing.
David notices the crazed, swirling madness that's starting to form in your eyes and asks "(font:"courier new")["Are you okay?"]
[[Subcome to the madness->Kill David]]
[[Tell him your okay and shake off your murderous intent->Ignored David]] You always believed in the bakers. All twelve of them.
Genevera, Steve, Alex
[[Stand up->Kill David 3]]Ethan, Nathan, John
[[Look over at David, who is more confidently looking for a way out->Kill David 4]]Nick, Amanda, Peg
[[Raise your knife behind his back->Kill David 5]]Jaun, Bernard, and Teddy
[[Kill David->Kill David 6]]You thrust the knife into Davids back, his attempts to scream doused by him garggling his blood. You whisper softly into his ear.
"You do not defy the dozen of bakers, who worked so hard each and every day. Their rise to power is justified, and their glory will succeed this democracy"
[[Twist the knife->Kill David 7]]Tears stream down his face, unable to convey any more emotion than that. He falls limp to the ground, the knife cutting open half of his back as he fell. You start laughing, no longer concerned with day or night, month or year. You are only concerned with your new gods, the bakers dozen, who sacrificed you in order to achieve greatness outside these bakery walls.
You lose all sense of reality and feast upon Davids body. Your wait continues, passing the time by writing on the wall and staring off into the distance. You're content with your new life
One day, a part of the outside wall crumbled off and you are now free to leave.
[[Leave->Leave The Ruins Of The Bakery]]
[[Stay->Stay inside]]You stay inside forever. Your warped mind would never be accepted by any society if you left anyway. You stay in the buried rubble of the bakers initial prison, happy you died for a good cause
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You left the ruins of your former job and time sink to find that the world outside is pretty much destroyed. No signs of life emmit from this place. You are upset that your newfound thirst for blood can't be quenched, so you venture out to find something to kill.
You laugh to yourself, realizing you basically caused the end of the world. And you will die in honor, unlike David.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You picked the gun up and put it in your back pocket. Three rounds of ammo. You never know.
Suddenly, you hear an explosion. The front of the bakery has been destoryed by a grenade. You don't know if David is okay or not
[[Check on David->Checked for David]]
[[Screw this, I'm getting out of here. I just wanted to get out of work->Flee the riot]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
Nah, you don't think things will get that bad. Someone else picked up the gun first. Some hobo or something.
Suddenly, you hear an explosion. The front of the bakery has been destoryed by a grenade. You don't know if David is okay or not
[[Check on David->Checked for David]]
[[Screw this, I'm getting out of here. I just wanted to get out of work->Flee the riot]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You checked to see if David was alright. Turns out, he was!
[[Okay, now run like crazy->Flee the riot]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You run home from the riot, despite how long of a walk it's going to be. You're happy with the chaos you caused, probably because it beats having to wait on grumpy old men all day. On your way home, you notice that one of the bakers, Ethan, sitting at a bench two blocks away from the riot. Come to think of it, he wasn't at work, was he?
[[Approach Ethan->Approached Ethan]]
[[Go home and pretend you didn't see him->Ignore Ethan]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You approach him and ask why he wasn't at work. He says you know too much and pulls out a pistol
[[Run away->Ran from Ethan]]
[[Punch him->Punch Ethan]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]
(if:(history:)contains "Picked The Gun Up")[[[Shoot him->Shoot Ethan]]]
You ignored Ethan and headed straight for home.
When you go there, you noticed that the riots where on TV. Your getting phone calls from all your friends asking if you are okay.
[[Tell them you caused all of this->Admit To Friends]]
[[Tell them you are fine and safely home->Friends know you're safe]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You tried to run away from Ethan, but he managed to shoot you in the leg. You let out a small yelp, but no one can hear you besides Ethan. He now hovers over you
[[Plead for your life->Plead With Ethan]]
[[Call him some nasty name->Ethan Kills you]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You tried to punch Ethan, but he shoots you in the arm. You cry a little bit but Ethan covers your mouth as you fall.
[[Fall to the ground->Ethan Kills you]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You shoot Ethan in the knee caps, and he falls to the ground, dropping his backpack. Out of it falls a small inactive bomb. You check out the rest of his backpack to find other small bombs.
Ethan tells you it was a part of the movement to reform the bakery to its former glory, before the threat of Tanning Salons and Ice Cream got in the way of good old fashioned glazed donuts and assorted breads. He planned on placing the bombs all over town, killing specifically the board members who were for the idea.
[[Tell him that you made up the whole controversy for kicks to begin with->Tell Ethan The Truth]]
[[Hold up, This guy is crazy, why is he still alive?->Kill Ethan]]
[[Take him to prison->Arrest Ethan]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You tried to plead with Ethan.
It didn't work.
[[*Gulp*->Ethan Kills you]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Ethan shoots you in the head before you have time to say good bye. You are dead, in an abrupt (but let's face it, no way canonical) end to your life.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You tell Ethan your story about how you started the whole movement basically out of boredom. He listened paitently as you explained how tired you were of your retail job and did this to spice up your life. You smiled and looked into the convieniant sunset, ready to move on from this mistake you've made.
After you finish your story, Ethan finds the power to stand up. He managed to do this out of nothing but pure rage.
[[Shoot Ethan Again, this time in the head->Kill Ethan]]
[[Take the bombs and run home->Home With Bombs]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You shoot Ethan in the head and kill him. All the cops in town are still busy, so you'll probably get away with this. You take the bombs.
[[Head home now->Home With Bombs]]
[[Throw bombs in river->Toss bombs away]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You take Ethan to the police station, where you're charged with possession of an unliscensed and no very well described firearm. Bot are Ethan and yourself are thrown into different cells.
You have a cellmate named Sam. Sam is tall and dark and genderly ambiguous. They tell you that life in prison isn't so bad as long as you keep your distance from big mamma. Big mamma is the cafeteria manager, once charged with arson. Sometimes they'd find matches hidden in whiskey she smuggled in. It's probably because big mamma's dad used to be a camp ranger at Oak No's Park. It was a popular tourist destination back in the day. Sold fruit cakes known the world over. Rumor has it that Nixon had one of those fruit cakes every month.
[[This route is getting stupid. I want something different->Shortcut to Jazz Route]]
[[Oh God, WE GET IT. Just take me back to where I went wrong already->Approached Ethan]]
You took the bombs home, and buried them in the backyard. Years from now you forgot about this whole uprising and decided to plant a tree righ where you planted the bombs.
Huh. Fitting I guess?
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You chucked the bombs into the local river. Sadly, you hit a small family of innocent ducks. But at least they weren't endangered!
You decide to go home and pretend this all didn't happen
At home, you fell back into the routine. You browsed Youtube and went to sleep. When you woke up, however, you had to find a different job. So begins the next chapter in your life. Maybe at that local video rental shop Maybe title this chapter the "The Last Video Rental Store"? Who knows.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] What? This is just world building.
[[No it's not, it's rambling about crap thats unimportant->Shortcut to Jazz Route 2]]Hey, people love to read unimportant things if they are well written and suck you in
[[*Snicker*->Shortcut To Jazz Route 3]]
[[About that...->Shortcut To Jazz Route 3]]
[[Yeah, but yours just sucks->Shortcut To Jazz Route 3]]OKAY FINE THEN HERE'S THE JAZZ BAND ROUTE
[[Yes please->Jazz Band]]
[[You don't get any other options, here's the Jazz Band Route->Jazz Band]] One of your friends ratted you out to the police. Honestly, can't trust anyone these days, eh?
You ain't going back to prison, so you need to disguise yourself and flee the country. You look into the mirror, police sirens in the distance
[["My name is Nico and I am from Brazil"->Nico]]
[["My name is Shao and I'm from Canada"->Shao]]
[["My name is Bert and I'm from France"->Bert]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Your friends are happy that you're okay, but they can't see you grinning to yourself. You enjoyed the chaos you caused. You relish in your self satisfaction, watching the riots continue further and further into the city while you stay safe in the comfort of your home.
At least it wasn't a boring day at work.
(if:(count:(history:),"Checked for David")is 1)[Suddenly there was a knock on the door. You open it to find David, who was so happy with how you checked up on him earlier that he wanted to repay you in any way he could. And he means ANY way.]
(if:(count:(history:),"Checked for David")is 1)[So you two made out and you lived happily never making eye contact at work again]
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]From that day on, you became Nico, the Salesman with a bad attitude. You walked into that car dealership every morning at 9:30am, hoping to get another sale. But with Brazil's high import tax, it is next to impossible to get a lot of sales. But you get by in the end.
Suddenly, your daily life becomes routine again. You stand at your desk, looking out the window.
[[Wait for the gentleman to finish getting his coffee->Coffee Man Returns]]
[[Start another uprising->Nico's End]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You begin to obsess over your backstory, trying to become as boring and forgetable as possible as to blend in with Canandians. You say outloud to yourself "Brown is the most normal hair color right?! What's a really average brand people wear?! Can I ever go hiking again, or is that too obviously 'old me' of a hobby? What do people do?!? Apply to Home Depot? I'd be a barista, but is that too close to bakery clerk?!"
Suddenly, the cops bust in and arrest you.
''THE END''
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]]You go to France and change your name to Bert. Bert is a florist that can't tie his shoes and often asks customers to help him. He owns several cats, all imported from China. He love Chinese culture, but he keeps it mostly to himself.
No one would have suspected that the American livng in Lyon sheds his rubber mask every night and laughs to himself, almost turning into a scream as he tries to forget he's even wearing it. You wonder where you went wrong, and nothing interesting ever happened to you again.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]You turn around and there he is, the man who got coffee on the day you first planned your political uprising in the bakery. He was holding two cups of coffee, one for him, and one for you. He was a world travelling business man, and was stopping to see about the probability of selling his car here.
He didn't recognize you, but you remembered him.
(if:(history:)contains "Picked The Gun Up")[[[Shoot him before he can remember->Nico Kills]]]
[[Talk to the familiar face->Nico Chats]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]The cycle began again. This time, however, all of Nico's carefully laid traps bit him in the butt. He was killed in the middle of the uprising, never to be heard from again.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] You kill the man with the gun that has been by your side all these years. Fitting.
All of the running from the police has worn you down. You look at your reflection in the window, the cops surely on their way after hearing that shot.
[["My name is Shao and I am from Canada"->Shao]]
[["My name is Bert and I am from France"->Bert]]
[[Well. Nico had a good run->Nico Suicide]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You talked to the man, and told him how happy you were to see him. It was strained, but that was to be expected. It brought back painful memories of home, memories of people like David, Genevera, and Ethan. But this life, this lie, is what you chose. And you're gonna have to gin and bear it
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] Nico jumped out the window. It was 40 stories up, BTW. He didn't live
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] (font:"courier new")[My mother? Is this a your mom joke? Seriously?]
[[Yeah, I'm making a your mom joke, what of it?->Your mom joke]]
[[Play it off like you were joking->Barb joke]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")[That makes sense. She would be the one to lead it]
[[Yeah, could be any day now. Something about Ice Cream?->Stans Daughter And Karen]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")[Yeah, well, your mom is so stupid she couldn't tell the difference between an Amiga CD32 and European waffle iron]
[[David, you are literally the only person who would even get that joke->Obscure Amiga joke]]
[[...->Seriously though]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")[Ha ha. You're so weird sometimes.]
[[Agree and leave to continue ringing out the customer->Waited to come to counter]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]](font:"courier new")[Probably. But I'm definitely not the only one who got your mom last night]
You feel annoyed, and somewhat defeated. You promptly decide to end this route
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]
(font:"courier new")[Ha ha. But seriously, who?]
[[Stan->Heard From Stan]]
[[Genevera->Heard From Genevera]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You go to Oak No at the meeting spot and find nothing but a lone USB stick sitting on a bench. On it is a note that says (text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[I must warn you that we do not approve of what you are doing. However, we can not interfere, as you have not broken our rules. So consider this your warning. For your eyes only]]
[[Take the USB and wait out your plan->waiting for the plan to unfold]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Amanda told you that she was saving the animals and going on an adventure with them. She says she loves them more than humans, and wants to get them out of this violent environment. David is so weirded out that he decides to go back into the bakery by himself.
When you and Amandad are alone she pulls out a gun and drops it at your feet. She stares into your eyes and says (font:"Ariel Black")["Take it. You'll need it"]
[[Sure->Picked The Gun Up]]
[[Nah->Left gun alone]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Turns, out he had some really insightful views on American politics and some decent ones of Austrailian politics. The three of you go out for a drink and continue the dicussion for a bit, then you go back to the rioting.
[[Amanda's still loading the animals?->Amanda's Animals]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You can't actually go to the restroom. This options shouldn't exist. My bad.
[[Go back->Rooms In The Rubble]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You check the cookie decorators office. In it, there is a picture of the cookie decorator (You think her name might have been "Jenny?") with some tall pink skinned man. You ignore that though, because you noticed the computer is somehow on. Only basic commands are available.
[[:>READ ME->Read Me]]
[[:>FILES->Files]]
[[:>MEDIA PLAYER->Media Player]]
[[:>SHUT DOWN SEQUENCE->Shut Down]]The front of the store is blocked by rubble, cars, whatever is left of Genevera, and the third strongest wire racks.
[[Turn around->Rooms In The Rubble]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Fortunately, the store room had a door that led directly to the back of the building. "Had". It's now covered in chunks of building, dozen boxes of donuts, and plastic gloves.
You slip a message that read (font:"Mistral")[Please help us, we are trapped inside Smilin' Cookies and Bakery on Drexel Ave. Send hair product and toothbrushes] and you paitently wait
[[Stay here and munch of some cookies->Wait For Response]]
[[Look around some more->Explore bakery ruins]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Help never came. You rotted in there wondering if the world had met its end, or if they simply caught you in your lie and let you suffer for it. Perhaps this is karma?
You continued in pilosophical thought until you died
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]] When you left, the rubble inconviently collapse ontop of the doorway to the store room. Guess it's a dead end.
[[Check the cookie decorators office->Cookie Decorator Office]]
[[Try the Restroom->Restroom]]
[[Head towards the store front->Front Of Store]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]<:READ ME FILE:>
<:LAST UPDATE: 5/28/18:>
THIS IS JENNY? THE COOKIE DECORATOR. THIS IS MY COMPUTER. NO ONE BESIDES ME IS ALLOWED TO USE IT. UNLESS CIRCUMSTANCES ARISE WHICH SHOULD BE DETAILED IN THE FILES PAGE. BUT SINCE YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO TOUCH THIS COMPUTER, I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO SHIFT THROUGH FOR YOU.
THIS HAS EVERY CONCIEVABLE DISASTER RECORDED INTO IT, FROM BAKERS RIOTING TO RECITING POETRY, AND A SOLUTION FOR EACH. THEY ARE ALPHABETIZED TO HOWEVER I FELT LIKE IT.
PLEASE BE A DEAR AND STOP HIDING MY ROLLS OF TAPE.
THANK YOU. JENNY?.
<:END OF READ ME FILE:>
[[Go back to options->Computer Options]]You shuffled through the computer files, reading about disasters that ranged from tea cookie shortages to falling in love with woodland mammals. Right after the falling in love with woodland insects file, you found "Political Uprising within the company that starts a full blown wars"
[[Read the pretty fittingly named file->Read File]]
[[Keep searching->Other File Names]]Do you have any media to play?
(if:(history:)contains "Meeting at Oak No")[[[Yeah, of course->Have USB]]]
[[...No->Don't have USB]]You shut the computer down and you can't figure out how to turn it back on.
Crap
[[Meet Up With David and tell him about the computer->Tell David About Computer]]You go back and reevaluate your options
[[Try the restroom->Restroom]]
[[Try cookie decorators office->Cookie Decorator Office]]
[[Try the front of the store->Front Of Store]]
[[Try the store room->Store Room]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You tell David about the computer. He turns it back on for your because electronics are kind of his thing.
[[Thank David and call yourself stupid->Computer Options]]
[[:>READ ME->Read Me]]
[[:>FILES->Files]]
[[:>MEDIA PLAYER->Media Player]]
[[:>SHUT DOWN SEQUENCE->Shut Down]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You find a video file on the USB the mysterious man gave you.
[[Open Video File->Open Video]]
[[Back out now->Computer Options]]Well, I guess we are done here then.
[[Check other options->Computer Options]] (open-url:"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeOTT7MxTfw")
[[Go Back To Computer Options->Computer Options]] After reading the file, you became a survival natural. You managed to survive off of the concrete land with David, and eventually, you two gained the strength to move the ridiculously heavy rubble and venture into the world together.
After getting out, you find that the world had ended thanks to the baker uprising. So you both manage to live the rest of your lives in an empty world. It was lonely, but alright.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]You find the following, among others
"In the event that Obama is re-elected for a third term"
"In the event that health insurence is cut too low"
"In the event that Pluto is made a planet again"
"In the event that a nuclear bomb goes off within twenty mile of the bakery"
"In the event that one or many people need a toothbrush"
"In the event that I die due to aforementioned political uprising"
"In the event that I misspell something"
"In the event a monochromatic bear shows up and forces us to kill each other"
"In the event that you don't know how to play Hanafuda"
"In the event that I go blind"
[[Don't read these and go back->Computer Options]]You ignored the Shadow and tried to get further down the street. But you wouldn't make it that far to see the streets end. The shadow cast itself over you, too quick for you to turn around. It swallowed you and you fell into the street, darkness enveloping your entire body. You pass out, unsure if it was from your own fears or if it was so kind of drug.
[[Wake Up->Welcome To The Bakers Dozen]]
You turned around to investigate, shouting "Who's there?". You see nothing and decide to turn back around. On the ground in front of you, you see a Bread Slicer. Attached is a note that reads (font:"impact")["Your fate: TBD"]
Suddenly, the shadow you saw swallows you and forces you to pass out, bread slicer in hand.
[[Wake Up->Welcome To The Bakers Dozen]]You wake up in a large, round room. The ceiling is so high that it seems to go on forever into darkness. The floor is marbled in various shade of blue, swirling and shining like an ocean frozen in time. The circular wall that surrounds the room is a light blue, with 12 Navy blue doors evenly spaced throughout it. In the center is a bright yellow box. A young girl sits on top of it, sporting freckles and flowing blonde hair. She glares directly at you.
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["Where did you think you were going?"]]
[[Uh, home?->The Rules]]
[[None of your business->The Rules]](text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["Well, it doesn't matter. You're here now because you defied The Bakers Dozen. You simply can't just quit Smilin' Cookies And Bakery without permission. You must first pass... a test]]
[[What test? Am I failing in school all over again?->The Rules 2]]
[[Yeah, but see, I don't care?->The Rules 2]](text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["Look, you can be snarky all you want, but your opinon doesn't matter down here. Just listen to the rules, yeah?"]]
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["We are known as 'The Bakers Dozen', the secret society that runs the baked goods underworld. In order to keep the empire running, the twelve bakers have agreed to fight anyone who tries to desert the bakery. It would look bad if someone just walked out of one of our store, now wouldn't it? People might think we're not a good company to work for"]]
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["Me? I'm the manager of store #5, and one of the few who is in on this whole thing. I run a black market of illegal fire arms on the side, and I figured it would be good to have my weapons tested by the bakers and yourself, of course.]]
[[So what do I do?->The Rules 3]](text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")["Simple. I give you this sword, you fight the bakers. Choose a door and go in. Each one is marked with the name of the baker you will be fighting.]]
The girl hands you the sword. It's got a yellow handle with the word "Maybe" engraved into it.
You don't feel ready to tackle The Bakers Dozen, but you don't really have a choice.
[[BEGIN->Battle Select]](text-colour:"aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[Select A Stage]]
[[OPEN MENU->Menu]]
* [[Amanda, The Animal Lover->Amanda Boss]]
* [[Bernard, The Worker->Bernard Boss]]
* [[Peg, The Grandmother->Peg Boss]]
* [[Genevera, The Leader->Genevera Boss]]
* [[Steve, The Last Racist->Steve Boss]]
* [[Alex, The Father Of The Serial Killer->Alex Boss]]
* [[Ethan, The Bomb->Ethan Boss]]
* [[Nathan, The Gamer->Nathan Boss]]
* [[John, The Artist->John Boss]]
* [[Nick, The Creator->Nick Boss]]
* [[Jaun, The Millionaire->Juan Boss]]
* [[Teddy, The Grown Child->Teddy Boss]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Amanda")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Alex")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Bernard")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Ethan")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Steve")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nathan")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Peg")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nick")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Juan")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Teddy")[(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Genevera")[[[ESCAPE->Final Boss]]]]]]]]]]]]]You choose the door that says "Amanda" on it. Inside, you find a pet store. Animals are in various cages, and a smell reminiscent of fresh hay permeates through the store. At the counter, you see a tall woman with long brown hair. Dogs and cats roam around her, birds fly above her, and the goldfish crowd together against the glass in their tanks to look at her. She stares at you and smiles.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[Welcome. I noticed you chose to leave your job. I don't blame you, I guess.]]
She walks slowly out from behind the counter, revealing a blood stained apron.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[I left my first job too. I loved animals and I loved being around them all day]]
Her smile fades
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[But that love faded. It became a sad place, where animals were all caged up. Allllll daaaaaay loooonggg.]]
She pulled out a large assult rifle from behind the counter and started smiling again, brighter and more cheerful than ever.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[I set them free. And when The Bakers found me, they set me free toooooo...]]
You look into her eyes. It was a mix of greys and far off reflections, as if it were shiny clay. She raised the gun.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[NOW I'LL FREE YOU!]]
[[Fight Amanda->Amanda Battle]]You chose the door that has "Bernard" written on it. Inside, you find an elderly man sitting in front of his house. He's sitting in a rocking chair made of bricks, sipping lemonade from a little blue cup. You are impressed by the chair, but are even more impressed by what he says next.
(font:"Impact")[This chair took me a little less than a day to make. I finished it just last week. It's still not strong enough]
He sips on his lemonade again
(font:"Impact")[My donuts follow a rule: Heavy and solid. Nobody wants a house of sticks or hay, they want solid brick. To support the house we built, our donuts should never be flimsy and weak.]
He stands up and glares at you. He tosses the cup off to the right of you and it breaks.
(font:"Impact")[You thought we were weak. You thought you could just get up and walk out. Did you think that would prove anything?]
He breaks off a brick from his chair.
(font:"Impact")[We are not that weak. I am not weak. I. am. not. WEAK!!!]
[[Fight Bernard->Bernard Fight]]You went into the door that said "Peg". You walk into a perfectly average home with a perfectly average retired woman sitting in it. She offered you a drink, but you declined. She stands up.
(text-colour:"Pink")[(font:"Impact")[Is it me, or is it hot in here?]]
You assure her it's just her, but she grabs her fan and aims it at you.
(text-colour:"Pink")[(font:"Impact")[Is it ME, or is it HOT in here??]]
You agree with the lady, who seems a little more threatening and un-retired. She grins at you.
(text-colour:"Pink")[(font:"Impact")[Then let's get rid of your body heat!]]
[[Begin Battle->Peg Battle]]
You open the door marked "Genevera". Inside, you find a fairly standard bakery set up, just like the one in your store. You see a generally middle aged woman smoking a cigarette and thinking. She's wearing a neon pink wig over her brown middle aged hair. She sees you come in and jumps right towards you.
(text-colour:"Cyan")[(font:"Impact")[Look what we have here. Someone who was trying to walk out of their job today.]]
She brandishes a Wooden rolling pin at you. You pull out your weapon. She switches her wig out for a Russian General's hat.
(text-colour:"Cyan")[(font:"Impact")[It's too bad you don't work in fast food or at grocery stores. You can afford to do that there. But not in my Bakery. I am the leader of this group, and I will have my revenge on those who desert desserts]]
[[Begin Battle->Genevera Battle]]You go into the room marked "Steve". Inside you find a well lit mansion lobby with some old German decore. It looks all rather pleasant. In the center is a tall, slender guy with subtle facial hair and a fedora. He's holding a taser.
(text-colour:"Brown")[(font:"Impact")[These days, it's wrong to hate people for arbitrary reasons. You'll always be labeled someting, not matter what you say, do, or even look like. And that's fine.]]
He lowers his taser and starts to rub his eyes. He coughs and puts the taser back up.
(text-colour:"Brown")[(font:"Impact")[I get labeled white trash, greedy, and jerk all the time. I never complain, I just go on. But call one person retarded, and the whole world is out to get you]]
He picks up a bottle of wine that was on the floor with his other hand. He eats the cork off of it and chugs.
(text-colour:"Brown")[(font:"Impact")[Maybe I am prejudice now. Maybe I always was. But one thing is clear to me now.]]
He smashes the wine bottle in his fists, blood pouring out of the side of his hand
(text-colour:"Brown")[(font:"Impact")[I don't care if you are black, white, Asian, Straight, gay, man, woman, 2 or 112. I hate you, and I will destroy you]]
[[Fight Steve->Steve Battle]]You chose the door that says "Alex" on it. Inside, you find some pretty old and worn down baking equipment scattered around a dimly lit area. Ovens, tables, cutters, bowls, and knives are scattered throughout the room, but it's hard to make anything else past the equipment. In the center of what is visable, however, is a short haired and rather muscular man, holding a Machete. He stares at the old equipment and doesn't turn around.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[I found this knife in my sons room. But that wasn't the first place I found it.]]
He raises a knife that looks like it was hand dipped in blood.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[I found it in the animals around the neighborhood. Then other kids down the street. And then in some of my own family]]
He turns around and notices you.
(text-colour:"red")[(font:"impact")[Oh, hey dude. Yeah, sorry, I have to kill you. I'll try out this move my son taught me.]]
[[Fight Alex->Alex Battle]]You chose the door that said "Ethan" on it. You find youself on top of a tower very high above the city. You see a short, dead eyed boy not moving on the very edge of the tower.
You try moving toward him, but he puts up his hand. You stop. He clenches his hand into a fist and when he opens it up, he reveals five egg shaped objects. He stares longingly at you, then tosses the objects behind him. After a short time, an explosion shakes the entire tower. One by one, the buildings all around the city catch fire, and more explosions pop off like it was as normal as the sun setting.
The boy smiles. He pulls out three more eggs.
(text-colour:"Orange")[(font:"courier new")[T o n i g h t , I g o b a c k.]]
[[Fight Ethan->Ethan Fight]]You enter the room that says "Nathan" on it. Inside you find a sort of depressing sea of cables, snack bags, and bean bag chairs. In the center you see a glowing screen and the outline of what you presume is a man. On the screen is some kind of crappy text adventure not about bakers. He turns to look at you, but all you can see against the glow of the screen behind him is his glasses.
(text-colour:"Green")[(font:"Impact")[You probably never have seen me before. I do all my baking from here. And living. And gaming.]]
He turns back around
(text-colour:"Green")[(font:"Impact")[Mostly gaming]]
The sounds of console fans whirling and plastic bags crunching filled the stale air, and Nathan played in silence. You wondered if the battle was ever going to begin.
[[Attack Nathan->Chose to attack Nathan]]
[[Leave him alone and wait->Chose to wait Nathan]] You open the door that says "John". Inside, you find a black and white studio covered in butterflies and paint. You see a rather effeminate man drawing a picture of a sad clown. You impaitently cough and he notices you.
(text-colour:"Purple")[(font:"Impact")[Oh, hello there! You're that little traitor, right?]]
He stands up and stumbles his way towards you. He gives you a donut in the shape of an arrow. It's drenched in glaze.
(text-colour:"Purple")[(font:"Impact")[I call this my "Iced Arrows"! They're so cute, aren't they?
Also, they are my weapon of choice. So die!]]
[[Begin Battle->John Battle]]You enter the door that says "Nick". You see him in an air conditioned bedroom in the middle of summer, sitting upright typing these exact words your are reading right now. You have a few questions for him.
[[Why did you make this game?->Why I made this game]]
[[Isn't it a little pretentious to put yourself in your own text adventure?->Pretentious Nick]]
[[Any tips you can give me?->Tips]]
[[Will you make a sequel?->Sequel]]
[[I need a hug right now->Hug]]
[[Yeah, can I just get the weapon from you and be done?->Get weapon from Nick]]You chose the door that said "Juan" on it. Inside, you find a lavishly dressed man living in a house made entirely from glass. He slicks his hair back with a comb and smiles at you.
(text-colour:"Lime")[(font:"Impact")[Hey there champ! I heard you had a little problem with our Bakery. Personally, I don't mind. But you know, appearences!]]
He grabs his cane. With a flick of his wrist, the cane starts to play a zesty beat. Juan begins to rap.
(text-colour:"Lime")[(font:"Impact")[I got my Fire Rod in hand
Droppin' them beats
My name is Juan
Millionaire of the week.
You wanna pick a fight with the czar of rhyme?
I guess I got time
Between sips of wine.
You take up your sword, I'll up my flow
You ain't gonna stop me, here we go]]
[[Begin Battle->Juan Battle]]You choose the door that says "Teddy" on it. Inside, you see a giant baby play room. I mean, really giant. Like you are the size of a toy in the room giant. Yoy have a slightly upset feeling, as you begin to piece together what's coming next.
As soon as you thought of it, you see a large, large baby sitting in front of you. He looks down at you from above, smiling. It's actually a rather large man, with a stubble and light facial hair dressed as a baby, but you pretend to not notice. picks up a box of donuts and tosses them around the room. You notice a kitten nibbles on one of the donuts, and immediately dies.
The baby picks you up and you can barely read the name "Teddy" on his onsie.
(text-colour:"Grey")[(font:"Impact")[(css:"font-size: 200%;")[Goo.]]]
[[Begin Battle->Teddy Battle]][[Return to Menu->Menu]]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Amanda")[SUPER AK-97: An amazing assult rifle so advanced that it requires at least seven years of playing shooters to even use it. Won from Amanda.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Alex")[JASON MACHETE: A very much so copyrighted item, so for the sake of keeping this game online, we'll say Alex's son is named "Jason" and he's a serial killer. Won from Alex.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Bernard")[STONE BRICK: A brick made from pure stone. It's said it was made by hand by a very insecure gentleman. Won from Bernard.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Ethan")[MILITARY BOMBS: Highly explosive bombs (as opposed to the lowly explosive bombs that he used to have) capable of large scale destructions against the right person. Won from Ethan.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Steve")[SPARK TASER: A taser owned by a man paranoid that the government is spying on him through any other weapon. The taser does not share its owners views. Won from Steve.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nathan")[HANDSOME PICTURE: A picture depicting a handsome human being. Rumored to be so handsome that it's actually lethal. Nathan never actually saw the picture and took the dealer at their word. Won from Nathan.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Peg")[WINDY DESK FAN: A small fan that doesn't actually annoy you, but most people assume it does. Won from Peg.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Peg")[GLASS CARDS: A token of appreciation from behind the curtain. Won from Nick.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Juan")[FIRE ROD: A cane known for making it's weilders suddenly good at rhyming. Won from Juan.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated John")[ICED ARROWS: A set of arrow shaped donuts that are mostly a novelty. Won from John.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Teddy")[POISONED DONUTS: Literally donuts that have been poisoned. Won from Teddy.]
* (if:(history:)contains "Defeated Genevera")[WOODEN ROLLING PIN: Once used to make cookies, now it's made by machine. Won from Genevera.]
(if:(history:)contains "Investigate The Shadow")[THE BREAD KNIFE: IT'S A SECRET]Amanda is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Amanda")is 0)[[[Slice at Amanda with your sword->Attack Amanda - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Amanda")[[[Use The Super AK-97->Defeated Amanda]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Genevera")[[[Use The Wooden Rolling Pin->Attack Amanda - Weakness]]]Amanda took some damage from your sword attack.Not enought to kill her
[[Use Sword again->Attack Amanda - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Amanda - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Amanda")]Amanda has been defeated. In her final moments she laughed and mumbled something about freedom at last.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[You got the Super AK-97! Use it against an enemy who is weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]You attack Amanda with the wooden rolling pin. It does some hard Damage.
Amanda attacks you. 4 HP Damage.
[[Attack Again->Attack Amanda - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Amanda - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Amanda")]Genevera's leadership may have inevitably lead to the entire bakery's collapse, but she was a solid leader. You guess.
(text-Colour:"Aqua")[(font:"lucida console")[You got the wooden rolling pin! Use it agianst an enemy who is weak to it]]
[[Return to the main menu->Battle Select]]Alex is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Alex")is 0)[[[Attack Alex with your sword->Attack Alex - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Amanda")[[[Attack Alex with your Super AK 97->Attack Alex - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Alex")[[[Attack Alex with the Jason Machette->Defeated Alex]]]Alex doesn't take a whole lot of damage. His son has done worse tbh.
[[Continue Attacking->Attack Alex - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Alex - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Alex")]The gun his wife used does a considerable amount of damage.
[[Shoot again->Attack Alex - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Alex - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Alex")]Alex was defeated, his body dissolving back into the bakery equipment from wence he came. Strange.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[You got the Jason Machete! Use it against an enemy who is weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]Bernard is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Bernard")is 0)[[[Use your sword->Attack Bernard - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Alex")[[[Use your Jason Machete->Attack Bernard - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Bernard")[[[Use your Stone Brick->Defeated Bernard]]]It does little to bernard. You're unsure if your sword isn't just a really long plastic knife
[[Slash again->Attack Bernard - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Bernard - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Bernard")]You'd be surprised how much damage a Machete does against an older man.
[[Continue Slicing->Attack Bernard - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Bernard - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Bernard")]Bernard has been slain. He really wasn't that strong, and he'd probably get upset if you told him that.
(text-colour:"aqua")[(font:"lucida console")[You got the Stone Brick! Use it on an enemy that's weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]] Ethan is at full Health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Ethan")is 0)[[[Attack with your sword->Attack Ethan - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Bernard")[[[Attack with your Stone Brick->Attack Ethan - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Ethan")[[[Attack with your Military Bomb->Defeated Ethan]]]You pluck away at Ethan's Health with your sword
[[Continue your attack->Attack Ethan - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Ethan - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Ethan")]The stone brick is super effective!
[[Continue your attack->Attack Ethan - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Ethan - Weakness") is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Ethan")]Ethan exploded in a minutre ball of fire convienently around him.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"lucida console")[You got the Military Bombs! Use them against an enemy who is weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]] You find yourself at a ladder that leads out into the city. You hear a familiar angry growl.
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[Where are you going? We were having fun, weren't we?]]
You turn around to see the manager of store #5 glaring at you. You explain that you have defeated the bakers and thus have earned the right to leave. She scoffs at you.
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[Explain yourself all you want, you don't get to make the choice of when you're done. I control you down here. I say fight, you fight. Otherwise, I'll kill you.
So go on. Dance for me puppet.]]
[[Refuse Death->Final Boss 2]]
[[Accept Death->Final Boss - Wait a minute]]Steve is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Steve")is 0)[[[Use sword->Attack Steve - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Ethan")[[[Use Military Bombs->Attack Steve - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Steve")[[[Use Spark Taser->Defeated Steve]]]You attack Steve with your figurative Sword of reason. It does only a little to penetrate his mind.
[[Continue the attack->Attack Steve - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Steve - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Steve")]You use literal Military bombs. It's more effective than the sword.
[[Continue your attack->Attack Steve - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Steve - Weakness") is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Steve")]You defeated Steve and his prejudice ideals. Maybe he had a point, but most likely not.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"lucida console")[You got the Spark Taser. Use it on an enemy who may be weak to it!]]
[[Return to Main room->Battle Select]]You raised your sword, but it was knocked out of your hand by Nathan's weapon of choice: A framed picture of a particularly handsome individual.
(text-colour:"Green")[(font:"Impact")[Wait.]]
You have lost your sword to the pitch blackness that is Nathan's room. Nathan gets up and attacks again.
[[Begin Battle->Nathan Battle - Swordless]]Nathan is at full health
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Steve")[[[Use the Spark Taser->Attack Nathan - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nathan")[[[Use the Handsome Picture->Defeated Nathan]]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Steve")is 0)[[[You are screwed, so you died then and there->Lost to Nathan]]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Nathan")is 0)[[[Accept a quick and painless Death->Lost to Nathan]]]Nathan had to save his inferior text adventure. You politely waited for him to do so, then the battle began
[[Begin Battle->Nathan Battle - Sword]]Nathan is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Nathan")is 0)[[[Use your sword->Attack Nathan - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Steve")[[[Use the Spark Taser->Attack Nathan - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nathan")[[[Use the Handsome Picture->Defeated Nathan]]]Nathan felt every bit of the taser.
[[Continue attacking->Attack Nathan - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Nathan - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Nathan")]Nathan slumped over from the shock of it all. Feeling rather pleased with yourself, you took everything you came with and continued on your journey
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida console")[You got the Handsome picture! Use it against an enemy who is weak to it.]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]You lost to the ever so Handsome picture that Nathan used to beat your face in. As you died, you remembered that leaving the bakery was satisfying in and of itself, so you died in peace.
''The End''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]
[[Return to Stage Select->Battle Select]]It does only a little bit of damage against a vetern gamer.
[[Continue attacking->Attack Nathan - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Nathan - Sword") is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Nathan")]Peg is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Peg")is 0)[[[Use Sword->Attack Peg - Sword]]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Nathan")is 1)[[[Use the Handsome Picture->Attack Peg - Weakness]]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Peg")is 1)[[[Use the Windy Desk Fan->Defeated Peg]]]Peg takes a sword well, thanks to all of those years hardening her mind watching Jeopardy
[[Continue Attack->Attack Peg - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Peg - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Peg")]Peg is in love for the first time in years. She makes sure her husband doesn't notice her peaking
[[Continue enticing Peg until she falls for the picture->Attack Peg - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Peg - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Peg")]Peg fell over and you most certainly helped her up.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[You go the Windy Desk Fan! Use it against an enemy who is weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]I made this game because I thought it would be fun. I've tried my hand at making more complicated games in Game Maker in the past, but I'm not a great programmer, and I wanted to make something that I could be relatable in. This is sort of an extension of what I think about at work. The consequences of my actions, more or less. What if I just walked out of my job, or what if I set the store on fire. I wouldn't actually do those things, but it's fun to imagine how it would play out.
[[Go back to the list of questions->Nick Boss]]Oh, totally. Initially, I planned to make this only a little meta, but I thought it would be funnier if I took a jack hammer to the fourth wall here. Hope it's at least a little funny
[[Return to the list of questions->Nick Boss]]Yeah, you should have totally chosen to Investigate the shadow before coming here.
Also, if you decide to start an uprising, choose to call the bakery as a construction worker. You may get to use the item you get from doing that a little further down the line.
Okay, I don't want to spoil much else.
[[Return to the list of questions->Nick Boss]]Uh, maybe? I'm not expecting much from this. Putting out a game online is like casting a bottle into the ocean. I doubt it'll catch on. But if people want more, I'll try to give them more. If you're wanting a sequel, I really appreciate that you enjoy my game so much!
I will say I plan to expand this game with updates at some point. There is an extra route I want to do, but I think I'll wait until after I finish the initial planned routes and iron out all the bugs.
[[Return to the list of questions->Nick Boss]]Oh, see, the thing is about this battle is that you HAVE to have my weakness to continue. Do you have it?
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Peg")[[[Yes, here is is->Defeated Nick]]]
[[No->Nick Not Defeated]]* Hugs *
You are a beautiful person :)
[[Return to the list of questions->Nick Boss]]Awesome. I'll give you my item then.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[You got the Glass Cards! Use them against an enemy that's weak to them!]]
Well, next time I see you I'll return to my normal narrating self. It was nice to meet you! Have fun!
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]Well, I'll give you the answer just this once. It's Peg. Go fight Peg and come back to me.
[[Okay then. Return to the main room->Battle Select]]Juan is at full health.
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Juan")is 0)[[[Use Sword->Attack Juan - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Nick")[[[Use glass cards->Attack Juan - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Juan")[[[Use Fire Rod->Defeated Juan]]]Your sword is weak, your flow is low
It doesn't do much to steal the show
[[Continue attacking->Attack Juan - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Juan - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Juan")]The hit is crit
You're straight up legit
[[Continue Attacking->Attack Juan - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Juan - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Juan")]You defeated the boss
Without exhaust
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida console")[You got the Fire Rod! Use it against an enemy who is weak to it!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]John is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated John")is 0)[[[Use Sword->Attack John - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Juan")[[[Use Fire Rod->Attack John - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated John")[[[Use Iced Arrows->Defeated John]]]You attack John with you sword, but it's not hard enough to break him
[[Continue attacking->Attack John - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack John - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated John")]John's Iced Donuts can't handle your Fire Rod
[[Continue Attacking->Attack John - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack John - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated John")]John dissolved back into his art. All he left behind was a mask with the word "Roses" written on it. The sad clown in the painting is now a happy one. It probably means something, but you'll enjoy it even if you never figure it out.
(text-colour:"Aqua")[(font:"lucida console")[You got the Iced Arrows! Use them against an enemy who is weak to them!]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]Teddy is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Teddy")is 0)[[[Use Sword->Attack Teddy - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Juan")[[[Use Iced Arrows->Attack Teddy - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Teddy")[[[Use Poisoned Donuts->Defeated Teddy]]]This sword proves itself useless by doing a small amount of damage.
[[Continue Attacking->Attack Teddy - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Teddy - Sword")is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Teddy")]Teddy does not like donuts that aren't poisoned
[[Continue Attacking->Attack Teddy - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Teddy - Weakness")is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Teddy")]Teddy decides to take a nap after his temper tantrum. Kids.
(Text-Colour:"Aqua")[(font:"Lucida console")[You got the poisoned donuts! Use them against an enemy who is weak to it.]]
[[Return to the main room->Battle Select]]Genevera is at full health
(if:(count:(history:),"Defeated Genevera")is 0)[[[Use sword->Attack Genevera - Sword]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Teddy")[[[Use Poisoned donuts->Attack Genevera - Weakness]]]
(if:(history:)contains "Defeated Genevera")[[[Use Wooden Rolling Pin->Defeated Genevera]]]The leader would never surrender to just any old sword. At least, not on the first few swipes
[[Continue attack->Attack Genevera - Sword]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Genevera - Sword") is 8)[(go-to:"Defeated Genevera")]The leader can definitely take a few hits from good old fashioned vemon
[[Continue attack->Attack Genevera - Weakness]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Attack Genevera - Weakness") is 3)[(go-to:"Defeated Genevera")](text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[Cute. Refusing me is one of the last things you want to do. Besides you're not actually done. There's more to do.]]
[[Why? I defeated all of the bakers already, that was the deal->Final Boss 3]] (text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[Fool]]
She pulls out a sword much stronger than your own. She suddenly starts to melt into the ground. Surprised, you drop your own sword and the world around you becomes black.
She remorphs from the ground, wearing a long black apron and flaming red eyes. Her face looks like it is frozen in an agonized expression. She takes the sword and stabs it into herself, blood spewing from the wound and wrapping around the sword itself. Like a mold, the blood around the sword flies off and into her hand, retaining its sword shape. She speaks in a much deeper voice.
(text-colour:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans MS")[Everyone knows a bakers dozen is 13]]
[[BEGIN THE FINAL BATTLE->Final Battle]]Hey, Nick again. I promised myself that I wouldn't interfer again, but can you please take this a little more seriously? This is the final part of this story route, and I know you didn't think it'd actually have ended if you chose to accept death. Come on now.
[[Let's try this again->Final Boss]]The 13th Baker is at full health
[[Use Sword->No Effect]]
[[Use Super AK-97->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Jason Machete->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Stone Brick->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Military Bombs->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Spark Taser->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Handsome Photo->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Windy Desk Fan->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Glass Cards->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Fire Rod->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Iced Arrows->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Poisoned Donuts->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Wooden Rolling Pin->Normal Attack]]
[[Use Bread Slicer->Special Attack]]It does very little damage. But keep at it, it may go down.
[[Continue Attack->Normal Attack]]
[[Select Another Weapon->Final Battle]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Normal Attack")is 24)[(go-to:"Normal Ending")]Yes, of course. This is her greatest weakness.
[[She has been caught off guard. Slice again->Special Attack 2]]It has no effect. The baker does some damage to you.
[[Try again->No Effect]]
[[Choose another weapon->Final Battle]]
(if:(count:(history:),"No Effect")is 6)[(go-to:"Bad Ending")]You were defeated by taking too much damage. There is no hope for you now.
''GAME OVER''
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]After a long and grueling battle, you defeated the final baker. With this, you leave the underground passageway a changed person.
''THE END''
[[Return To Title->Title Screen]]Every other weapon was made by her. She was in control of this battle. She was in control of your life.
[[She falls to the floor, fear breaking the previous glare in her eyes. Slice again->Special Attack 3]]The Bread Slicer is something she can't control. But now, you're in control of the game. You're in control of your life down here. You don't have to play the bakers game.
[[Her eyes turn into passive ones, realizing her defeat. Slice again.->Special Attack 4]]You aren't their toy. You're ready to end it.
[[She's made peace with her mistake. Deliver the final slice->Good Ending]]The final of The Bakers Dozen falls to your knees.
(text-color:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans ms")["Looks like we didn't sell you high enough, huh?"]]
She coughs up a little bit of blood, catching it in her already blood soaked hand. You notice she's shaking
(text-color:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans ms")["I'm a little glad, actually. For me to waste so much time making weapons for the bakers, when they clearly weren't strong enough... well, a person like me doesn't have place in a bakery, right?"]]
She lays her entire body down, staring upwards into the darkness"
(text-color:"yellow")[(font:"comic sans ms")["Maybe Hell will suit me better."]]
With a weary smile, she dissolves away. The darkness that shrouded you clears away, going with the evil who brought it. The reign of the bakers dozen no longer rules this place. You are alone in this underground arena now, at peace for the first time in a while. Perhaps this means you own the bakery, at least from the underground. But you leave it either way, as this was the very thing you ran away from. You want to begin your life anew, using the experience here as a stepping stone towards the future.
You are now able to choose your own path in life. What you do with it lies beyond the ladder.
''THE END''
[[Return to the title screen->Title Screen]]You text Chris. Chris Dorian specifically. You have so many Chris's in your phone it's kind of absurd.
What should you say to him?
[[Hey.->Said Hey to Chris]]
[[Busy today?->Busy Chris]]
[[Do you want to get together a Jazz band?->Direct with Chris]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You said "Hey" to Chris. He sends "Hey hey, what's up?" back to you. You meander through casual conversation, answering questions of what you've been doing and how you're feeling today. Tension is minimal, so much so that you hate to bring up the question you came here for and risk making him uncomfortable. But you go through with it
[[If you're not busy, can we meet up after I get off work?->Meet Chris]]
[[So. Remember the band?->Remember the band with Chris]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"Nah, not too busy or anything" He replies. "Why? What's up?"
[[Want to hang out after work?->Meet Chris]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"I'm sorry, what? Ha ha." He said. He thinks you're joking, but you inform him you're serious about this.
"It's been ages since I picked up a drum stick, dude. Idk about all that." He replies
The conversation tapers off as the subject gets dropped. It's now going to be immersurably harder to convince Chris to join the new band.
[[Back off and regroup for the day->New plan for Chris]]
[[Give up on the Jazz band->Give up on the Jazz band]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You ask Chris to meet up... and it turns out, he is able to. He asks if it was cool to meet up by the bridge by his house, to which you say of course.
You spend the rest of the day looking forward to this meeting. You were never the closest to Chris when you were in the band, but you two shared a moment of two. Tonight, you'll catch up with a lot of little moments, and it'll lead to one big one.
[[Work until the end of your shift, go home, take a shower, get dressed, and walk to the bridge->Chris at the bridge]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You decide to play on his memories of being in the band, warming him up before you ask him about bringing it back together.
"I don't know, man." He said. "We had a good run, and I wouldn't trade it for the world, but it just didn't work out. Have you talked to Josh about this at all?"
[[No, not yet->Chris hasnt talked to Josh]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]You meet up with Chris on the bridge. You see him under the warm glow of a street light, looking over the edge into the water. He barely looks like he put effort into his outfit, but that sense of informality puts your mind at ease a little. You don't see a co-worker, or a roommate, or family here tonight, but a friend. How long has it been since you felt like you were in the presence of one of those? You don't just go and hang out with people anymore. Most of your interactions seem to have an endgoal; a purpose for existing. Here, it just feels like you, and him.
You say "Hey" and Chris turns around. You basically repeat your text conversation, with a little bit of catching up and a little bit of laughs. Something is different about it in the solitude of night though. Perhaps it's the emotion in your voices. Perhaps it's the focus on conversation rather than balancing your life outside of it. Whatever it is, you feel ready to tackle the question.
[[So I was thinking of getting the band back together again->Chris at the bridge 2]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"Well, let me know what he says, and I might join" He replies.
"Hey, I gotta go, but I'll ttyl, okay dude?"
You let him go, but you know you won't actually get Josh to come back to the Jazz band. It's futile. Why did you even bother?
''THE END''
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]]You back off and try again the next day. You are waiting for the same old man to get coffee the next day. Deep breaths. Here we go.
[[Text Chris again today->Talk to Chris]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]This is just a dream. You don't really want to get a band together. It's mostly just an escape for you. A pleasant thought to get through the harsh day. You'll have many pleasant ideas like this. But they will never be completed.
You lived your life. Then you died.
''THE END''
[[Return to title->Title Screen]]"Oh, wow, really?" Chris replies, clearly taken aback by the idea. He turns his head to look at you. There's a small silence even more eerie than the dead of the night around you. But you won't let that eerie silence get to you.
[[Yeah. It's just... don't you miss it too? The music, the energy, being appreciated by an audience->Chris at the bridge 3]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"It's not about missing it," Chris replies. "It's just I'm not sure we should go back to it, you know? We didn't end on a particularlly great note."
[[All the more reason to give it another shot, yeah?->Chris at the bridge 4]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]Chris pauses for a second, and then chuckles a bit. He turns his head back out towards the horizon.
"We're older now. We've got complicated lives. We're not living in our parents house, following our dreams without paying the bill. We have to think about being stable, not comfortable."
[[I'd rather live unstable and following my dreams than comfortable and bored->Chris at the bridge 5 - Daring]]
[[You're right, but who says we can't have both?->Chris at the bridge 5 - Reserved]]
[[Maybe I'm trying too hard to relive my glory days...->Chris at the bridge 5 - Give Up]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"I understand the feeling, but we can't just do this on a whim," Chris replies. "And you can't expect anyone to just give up stability for creative fulfilment, like you."
His words ring true, but you don't want to face the alternitive.
[[Who's to say we can't have both?->Chris at the bridge 5 - Reserved]]
[[(Pause Menu)->Pause Menu]]"Maybe," Chris says with a sigh "But that takes someone with ambitions. And unfortunately, none of us have that ambition any more"
He picks up a rock off the ground and chucks it into the river. There's a boat going past, and he almost hit it.
"You're probably alone in this," He exhales "But keep trying, okay? I know you'll follow your dreams anyway,"
You talk with Chris for a while longer, and it's time that you both part ways. Before he goes, he leaves you something: an old game he thought you might like called "Binary Land". You thank him for the gift and head back home. You play the game for a bit and like it a lot. It's about two penguins separted on opposite sides of a maze. When one moves, so does the other in the opposite direction. It makes meeting both together at the exit challenging, but it's rewarding all the same. You smile to yourself and turn the game off.
Tomorrow may yet be a new day.
''THE END''
[[Return To Title Screen->Title Screen]] It was only after the words left your mouth that you fully understood them. Is this what you've become? Clinging onto your rose tinted past, hoping to feel even a little bit better about yourself?
You start having second thoughts about all of this. Your lack of confidence in your plan causes you to back off and continue chatting with Chris about life. Eventually you forget about the idea. You and Chris part ways.
You went home to curl up in bed and go back to reality in the morning. Your life continues like this. Perhaps you felt the urge to break out again later down the road, but each time it gets weaker. Your will has been broken.
''THE END''
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]]//"Where will I go tonight?"
I asked the crow before his flight.
The crow grinned in a puff of smoke
Filling my lungs, I began to choke.
"Far Away, but close to me,
You'll just have to see"
I closed my eyes and listened to him speak,
Smoke wrapping my body and making me weak.
"Listen to your fears, but keep them at bay,
Listen too long, and they'll want to play"
He snickered and let me go
And I fell back to the earth below
Like a meteor made of tears,
I seeped through the clouds of my fears
But the crow will choke me until the end,
Despite what I pretend.
Away, my fears I shall always send
Until the Carrier flies again//
[[Recite more poetry->Contruction Outside]] //The told me once there was no house
To build myself inside out.
They told me twice I dream in bed
They told me that construction's dead.
I was coated in worms when it was my turn in line
The Teller told me I had no place, no time.
So I laid my money down and said
"I'd rather spend it all instead".
I couldn't speak as I built my place
As other words filled that space.
If I opened my mouth, I'd chew their words
The house would fall under what I heard
I will live in that house, someday I hope,
As soon as I learn to cope.
I build around the sea of speech
Silent home one day in reach.//
[[Recite another poem->I Am No More]]//I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more//
You can't really remember how the rest of it goes.
[[Recite more poetry->Poetry Route 2]]You snap back to reality when the old man says "Just the coffee" to you. You ring the man out in a bit of a daze. You keep thinking about the poems through the rest of the work day, reciting the lines that stuck out to you. You felt like it was a good idea to recite them in your head. It kept you motivated.
[[Clock out for the night->Poetry Route 3]](text-colour:"aqua")[(font:"Lucida Console")[[[Inventory->Inventory]]]]
{[(font:"Lucida Console")[(link:"Save Game")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game Saved!]]]]}
(font:"Lucida Console")[[[Return To Battle Select->Battle Select]]]
(font:"Lucida Console")[[[Return To Title Screen->Title Screen]]]You go home for the night. When you sit down to relax, you realize that you have quite a bit more energy than you normally do. Normally, you feel like you're going to collapse because life in general drains you, but you feel better today.
Today, you go out and have fun.
[[Go out and have fun->DISCLAIMER]](text-color:"Orange")[(font:"Ariel")[WELCOME TO THE WORLD MAP]]
[[OPEN BACKPACK->Backpack]]
[[My House->My House]]
[[Josh's House->Josh's House]]
[[Smilin' Cookies and Bakery->Work]]
[[Arcade Woz->Arcade Woz]]
[[The Library->Library]]
[[Bar Snack->Bar Snack]]
[[The Store->The Store]]
[[Urchin River->Urchin River]]
[[Inventory->Inventory Poetry]]
(link:"SAVE GAME")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game Saved!]]
[[Side Quests->List Of Side Quest]]
[[Poetry->Poetry]]
[[Return to Map->World Map]]
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]]This is the place that you worked so hard to move into, and now feels like a comfortable hospital that you get asprin from and take long, exhausting naps.
[[Feed your cat->Feed The Cat]]
[[Check your computer->Home Computer]]
[[Play a video game->Play Games]]
[[Make a meal->Meal]]
(link:"SAVE GAME")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game Saved!]]
[[Return to world map->World Map]]You went to Josh's House, but he has already moved by the time you got there.
[[Try his new address->Josh's House]]
[[Return to the World Map->World Map]]For some ungodly reason, you decide to stop by your job again. You go in and find David working the counter, and you assure him that you didn't forget anything.
[[Talk with David->Talked To David]]
[[Buy some stuff->Bought Cookies]]
[[Go into the back room->Back Room]]
[[RETURN TO MAP->World Map]]You went to Arcade Woz. It is an often crowded place with games to play, tastey refreshments and a bar
[[Play "Sour Cream, Chocolate Milk, Legal Obligations"->RPS]]
[[Socialize at the bar->For A Drink - Back]]
[[Order Food->Order Food]]
[[RETURN TO MAP->World Map]]You walk up the stairs of the hip, new age library but find the door locked. You look around to see if there was a mistake, but no, the library seems to be temporarily closed. You look into the grass and find a colony of ants marching about. If you look really close, they seem to spell out the words "Development Time Got Cut Short"
You go somewhere else.
[[Return to the World Map->World Map]](if:(count:(history:),"Bar Snack")is 0)[You walk into a bar... and say "ouch"......... '* Cough *']
You walk into Bar Snack. You don't often go in here, but you know a few people who do.
[[Grab a drink->Got A Drink]]
[[Talk to the Bar Tender->Bar Tender talk]]
[[Talk to Chris->Talk To Chris K]]
[[Return to the World Map->World Map]]
(if:(history:)contains "Run with Amanda")[[[Talk to Amanda->Talked To Amanda Bar]]]You arrive at The Store. It's one store virtually everyone goes to, so you have always spoke the name as "The Store" with weary resignation in your voice. You were almost hit in the parking lot at least twice, and the store itself resembles a double speed ant farm with half smiling greeters. Like always, you want to leave as soon as plausible.
[[Head to the video games->Run in with Nathan]]
[[Head to the giniger snaps->Run in with Chris]]
[[Head to the Politics Repelant->Run in with David]]
[[Return To Map->World Map]]
(if:(history:)contains "Amanda's Journey")[[[Head to the cat food->Run with Amanda]]]This is a quiet spot for you to relax. It's like time is still here.
[[Relax and watch the world go by->By The River]]
[[Return to the World Map->World Map]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Talked To Amanda Bar")is 1)[[[Talk To Amanda->Amanda River]]]* (if:(history:)contains "Amanda River")[Cell phone: [[USE->Use Phone]]]
* (if:(history:)contains "Bought Cookies")[Cookies]
[[Return to backpack->Backpack]]SIDE QUESTS:
* (if:(history:)contains "Socialize At Bar")[#1: For A Drink] (if:(history:)contains "Reading Palm - True")[- CLEARED!]
* (if:(history:)contains "Amanda's Journey")[#2: Amanda's Journey] (if:(history:)contains "Amanda River")[- CLEARED!]
* (if:(history:)contains "Run In With Nathan")[#3: Gamers Challenge] (if:(history:)contains "Q3Right")[- CLEARED!]
* (if:(history:)contains "Talk With Chris K")[#4: Chris And The Bar Tender] (if:(history:)contians "Gave Chris Cookies")[- CLEARED!]
[[Return to backpack->Backpack]]* //[[The Flight Of The Carrier->The Flight Of The Carrier 1]]//
* //[[Construction Outside->Construction Outside 1]]//
* //[[I Am No More->I Am No More 1]]//
* (if:(count:(history:),"Reading Palm - True")is 1)[//[[In A Tick->In A Tick]]//]
* (if:(count:(history:),"Talk With Bar Tender 2")is 1)[//[[Candles Of Release->Candles Of Release]]//]
* (if:(count:(history:),"Q3Right")is 1)[//[[I Saw The World->I Saw The World]]//]
[[Return to backpack->Backpack]]HOW TO PLAY:
Sour Cream beats Chocolate Milk!
Chocolate Milk beats Social Obligations!
Social Obligations beats Sour Cream!
Choose one randomly, and when you're ready, click "BEGIN" to see if you won or lost against the computer.
[[BEGIN->RPS 2]](font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #1: FOR A DRINK]]]
You sit down at the bar and order some Sugar Soda. You socialize a bit, but it only really amounts to that. However, someone catches your eye. A young lady with bright red hair is looking rather lonely on the other end of the bar. You deicde to approach her and ask if she's feeling okay.
"Well, you see," She begins "I don't know why but I've been looking for someone who can really sink some time into that 'Sour Cream, Chocolate Milk, Legal Obligations' machine. The last guy I dated said he sunk fifty rounds into it, but I can read peoples palms and find out just how many games they've played. He was lying and it really hurt me..."
[[Sounds like a real jerk->For A Drink - Normal]]
[[I don't believe you->For A Drink - Non-Believer]]
(if:(count:(history:),"RPS 2")is (min:50))[[[I've already sunk 50 rounds, read my palm->Reading Palm - True]]]
You ordered some food. It was pretty good!
[[Return to arcade->Arcade Woz]](text-color:"Lime")[(font:"Comic Sans MS")[(css:"font-size: 200%")[(print:(either:"Sour Cream","Chocolate Milk","Legal Obligations"))]]]
[[Try again->RPS 2]]
[[Exit Game->Arcade Woz]]"Yeah he was..." She replies. "Say... why don't you try it? I'll buy you a drink if you play six million times. I'm really lonely and would love it if you did."
[[Sure->Accept For A Drink]]
[[Nah, not now->Decline For A Drink]]"No, really! Go ahead, try it. Play it six million times and come back to me, you'll see"
[[Fine->Accept For A Drink]]
[[Not now->Decline For A Drink]]She looks at your hand, studying it like she was going to find treasure in it.
"Oh wow! You actually did it!" She exclaims. "I'll be honest, I didn't think you'd go through with it. Thanks!"
You don't tell her that you actually didn't do that.
She buys you the drink she promised. You continue talking with her about your mutually favorite Dairy Products and reason to skip work for a good long while. Eventually, she slips you a piece of paper.
"I wrote this a while ago, and I was waiting to give it to someone I trusted. Here, take it"
//In A Tick//
//The clock hung above my head.
Sweat.
Vomit.
Fear.
Dread.
"You May not rest"
I heard someone say
Day to day
"There's always a way"
What will they do with me?
What will we do with him?
Suits talk.
Doors shut.
Time grows slim.
Ceilings Tall.
Marble Floor.
No one wants to be here.
Strangers Fall.
Closed Doors.
No one envies fear.
Once a month, I fell into there.
Name.
Age.
Address.
Despair.
Feeling Sick.
Eyes Wide.
The clock moves a tick.
No place to hide.
Doors unlock.
I leave with pain.
In a tick of the clock.
Scars remain.//
''OBTAINED NEW POEM''
(font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #1: END]]]
[[Return to the arcade->Arcade Woz]] "Oh really? Thank you! I'll be waiting here for you <3"
[[Return to the arcade->Arcade Woz]]"Oh, okay... Well, I'll be waiting here if you change your mind <3"
[[Return to Arcade->Arcade Woz]] You spot the odd red haired girl at the bar again.
"Hey! Have you played six million games yet?"
[[Yes, I have->Reading Palm - False]]
[[No, I haven't->Arcade Woz]]
(if:(count:(history:),"For A Drink - Back")is 0)[(go-to:"Socialize At Bar")]
(if:(count:(history:),"Reading Palm - True")is 1)[(go-to:"End Of Quest 1")]She reads your palm very intently, as if searching for her purpose in life.
"Liar!" She finally exclaims, "Why is it men feel like they have to lie about this? Just be honest with me!"
Flustered, she shoos you away from the bar. More than a few people are looking at you at this point.
"Come back when you really have played 50 games!" She says
[[Return To The Arcade->Arcade Woz]]
(if:(count:(history:),"RPS 2") is more than 50)[(go-to:"Reading Palm - True")]//The clock hung above my head.
Sweat.
Vomit.
Fear.
Dread.
"You May not rest"
I heard someone say
Day to day
"There's always a way"
What will they do with me?
What will we do with him?
Suits talk.
Doors shut.
Time grows slim.
Ceilings Tall.
Marble Floor.
No one wants to be here.
Strangers Fall.
Closed Doors.
No one envies fear.
Once a month, I fell into there.
Name.
Age.
Address.
Despair.
Feeling Sick.
Eyes Wide.
The clock moves a tick.
No place to hide.
Doors unlock.
I leave with pain.
In a tick of the clock.
Scars remain.//
[[Return to Poem List->Poetry]]Nothing left to do here, I'm afraid
[[Return to the arcade->Arcade Woz]]//"Where will I go tonight?"
I asked the crow before his flight.
The crow grinned in a puff of smoke
Filling my lungs, I began to choke.
"Far Away, but close to me,
You'll just have to see"
I closed my eyes and listened to him speak,
Smoke wrapping my body and making me weak.
"Listen to your fears, but keep them at bay,
Listen too long, and they'll want to play"
He snickered and let me go
And I fell back to the earth below
Like a meteor made of tears,
I seeped through the clouds of my fears
But the crow will choke me until the end,
Despite what I pretend.
Away, my fears I shall always send
Until the Carrier flies again//
[[Return to Poetry List->Poetry]] //The told me once there was no house
To build myself inside out.
They told me twice I dream in bed
They told me that construction's dead.
I was coated in worms when it was my turn in line
The Teller told me I had no place, no time.
So I laid my money down and said
"I'd rather spend it all instead".
I couldn't speak as I built my place
As other words filled that space.
If I opened my mouth, I'd chew their words
The house would fall under what I heard
I will live in that house, someday I hope,
As soon as I learn to cope.
I build around the sea of speech
Silent home one day in reach.//
[[Return to Poetry List->Poetry]] //I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I AM NO MORE
I am no more
I am no more
I am no more//
And so on and so forth
[[Return to Poetry List->Poetry]]You chatted with David a bit. He tells you about his husband and the games he has been playing. Nothing really out of the ordinary, just the usual small talk you guys both make.
[[Do Something Else->Work]]You don't really like your cookies a whole lot any more, but with your discount, you can't pass up on the deal.
''OBTAINED COOKIES''
[[Back to looking around->Work]]You go into the back room. Back there, you see all the tables and orderforms you're used to seeing. Just with the strange feeling of wanting to leave as soon as possible, knowing you're not on the clock at all.
[[Notice the object on the ground->Amanda's Journey]]
[[Talk to Teddy->Talked to Teddy]]
[[Go back to the front->Work]](font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #2: AMANDA'S JOURNEY]]]
You find a phone on the ground that says "Amanda" on the back. You go back up front and ask David if Amanda is still here. He says that she was going to The Store after work.
[[Head to The Store to give the phone back->The Store]]
[[Search the phone->Search Phone]]
[[Hold onto the phone and wait a bit.->Work]]You talked with Teddy and it was rather fulfulling. He seemed to act a bit childish, but it was generally a plesant time.
But you see him at work all the time, so it felt rather annoying.
[[Return to back room->Back Room]]It's locked, but I'm judging you for trying anyway
[[Back to front room->Work]] (font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #3: GAMERS CHALLENGE]]]
You run into Nathan in the games and he immediately challenges you to a gamer knowledge quiz. You don't get to back out, as he seems pretty adament about it. Don't worry, you're in a web browser, so you can cheat.
[[BEGIN->Gamer Quiz Question 1]]You go to the Ginger Snaps and find Chris, a fomrer drummer for the Jazz Band you were both a part of. You guys talk for a bit about life and what you've been up to since the band broke up. It was pretty nice talking with him and you genuinely want to do it more
[[Return to The Store->The Store]]You run into David buying some repellant. You decide to pick up three cans while you were there.
Wait this isn't the time for this
[[Return to The Store->The Store]]You go to the one place to Amanda might be - The Cat Food. There, you see a note. Well, I say a note, but really, it was a giant neon sign in the middle of the isle, blocking anyone with a cart from getting in, made by someone who has little idea of subtlty. It said (font:"Impact")[(text-color:"Neon Yellow")[AMANDA HAS GONE TO A PLACE WHERE YOU GET DRINKS THAT ISN'T THE ARCADE. OR HERE, I GUESS.]]
You decide to head to the bar, mumbling to yourself some choice words of annoyance.
[[Back to the store->The Store]]You fed the cat dried fish. We have to think of a name for the kitty, but you promise you'll come back when you think of one. Bye Bye.
[[Do something else->My House]][[:>BROWSER->Browser]]
[[:>MEDIA PLAYER->Home Media Player]]
[[:>NOTEPAD->Notepad]]
[[:>LOG OFF->My House]]What game do you want to play today?
[[Space Station 7: Part Deux->Space Station 7]]
[[Adequate Carpainters Odyessy->Adequate]]
[[Shin Desu Ka: Phursona 4->Phursona 4]]
[[Father 3->Father 3]]
[[Switch Panic!->Switch Panic]]
[[Do something else->My House]]You are hungry. You decide to make yourself something.
[[Microwave something->Microwave]]
[[Order pizza->Order Pizza]]You waltzed into a galactic goove party starring a sexy pink haired space reporter named Ayeyaiyai. The game is instense, funny, and you keep chanting "Up Down Left Right Wolf Wolf Wolf" to yourself for the remainder of your life.
[[Play Something else->Play Games]]
[[Do something else->My House]]You jumped up in the air, weren't scared, and collected a power cable. Only 899 more to go. It would have been impossible if you didn't possess that crab. But the game prefers you to call it capturing.
[[Play something else->Play Games]]
[[Do something else->My House]]You stood in a circle and shouted "Phursona" a lot as a bunch of woodlen creatures dressed in sexy outfits. You feel kind of uneasy about this game, but they do have really well written backstories and nightmarish monster design.
[[Play something else->Play Games]]
[[Do something else->My House]] The Adequate Carpainter police busted through the door and threatened to arrest you if you try to play this game outside of Japan. You slowly give them the game where they never will localize the game. Ever.
[[Play something else->Play Games]]
[[Do something else->My House]]You were teleported to a random room in the game. Fortunately, you had a weird pig shaped controller to get yourself out and into another random room. In this room, you accidentially blew up the Taj Mahal.
[[Play something else->Play Games]]
[[Do something else->My House]]You're out of frozen dinners, so you eat popcorn.
Just three more days till pay day.
Sigh.
[[Do something else->My House]]You ordered some pizza and ate about half of it. You may not have any money left, but this pizza will last you a couple of days at least.
[[Do something else->My House]](font:"courier")[Where would you like to go?]
[[:>NEWS->News]]
[[:>SOCIAL MEDIA->Social Media]]
[[:>DIRTY->Porn]]
[[:>VIDEOS->Videos]]
[[:>GAMES->Games]]
[[:>BACK->Home Computer]]Do you have any media to play?
(if:(history:)contains "Meeting at Oak No")[[[Yes, I do->Have USB Home]]]
...[[No.->No USB Media]]You make a note on your computer to not be stupid. It never works for me either.
[[Return to PC->Home Computer]] Headlines for the day
"Local Bakery starts a riot in another timeline"
"46 Animals from 'Pets Are People' go missing; Third case this week"
"Independant Game Developer makes meta jokes in his game; water still confirmed to be wet"
[[:>BACK->Browser]]You check social media. You find everyone is either doing unrealistically great, are manically depressed, or plain stupid. You waste more time than you ever needed to reaffirming that fact.
[[:>BACK->Browser]]You log onto a dirty website.
[DESCRIPTION REDACTED]
[[:>BACK->Browser]]You watch a lot of videos by your favorite creators. They are begging not to be demonotized.
[[:>BACK->Browser]]The only game you have on your browser currently is "The Bakers Dozen"
Play game now?
[[:>YES->Title Screen]]
[[:>NO->Browser]]You open the USB to find a video on it
[[Watch video->Watch Home Video]]Shucks. That's too bad, friend.
[[Return to PC->Home Computer]][[Return to PC->Home Computer]]
(open-url:"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeOTT7MxTfw")One drink turned into about 15. You black out. You think? Hard to tell
[[Wake up at the World Map->World Map]]You talk to the bar tender a bit about your life and how it's going nowhwere. You feel alone at home and trapped at your job, as if there is no place you belong in this world. You're weak, tired, and wondering where it went wrong exactly.
The bar tender says "I heard somewhere once that 'Logic is for when our instincts fail us'. Right now, your insticts are failing you. You think you've failed, but look at what you have. A lot of people don't have their own place, and you work a stable job. The facts simply don't match reality, no?"
You feel a little better. You're glad to have someone to talk to.
[[Return to Bar->Bar Snack]]
(if:(count:(history:),"Bar Tender talk") is 1)[(goto:"Talk With Bar Tender 2")]You found Amanda, but it turned out to be here evil twin who happened to be in town for a funeral...
Moving on! She says Amanda is probably by the River. That's your next stop.
[[Return to Bar->Bar Snack]]. . . . .
. . . . .
. . . . .
[[Return to the River->Urchin River]]You still feel down and talk to the bar tender. He gives you a poem
//Candles Of Release
I want nothing more
Than to extinguish all of the worlds candles
And sit in silence as the smoke surrounds us.
I want nothing more than to stare at the black
Shadows around my frozen eyes
And hear nothing but my own mind
I want nothin more than to drown
In my own sorrow until I release my soul
And drift upwards until I feel no more
Can you do that for me?//
''OBTAINED NEW POEM''
[[Return to Bar->Bar Snack]]You finally find Amanda. The real one, at the Urchin River. You find her eyes staring off into the distance. She hears you come up to her.
"Congrats Nick, you found me!" She says smiling. "I knew you'd be here because... reasons! Now, you already have your reward for going through this mess to find me: The phone! You can use it in the inventory to go to some places faster. The password to open the phone is 11037!"
You're really confused, but you're just glad this quest is over with
''OBTAINED CELL PHONE''
(font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #2: END]]]
[[Return to World Map->World Map]]//I want nothing more
Than to extinguish all of the worlds candles
And sit in silence as the smoke surrounds us.
I want nothing more than to stare at the black
Shadows around my frozen eyes
And hear nothing but my own mind
I want nothin more than to drown
In my own sorrow until I release my soul
And drift upwards until I feel no more
Can you do that for me?//
[[Return to Poetry->Poetry]]SELECT ROUTE SHORT CUT
''WARNING: This will teleport you to another route. Be careful!''
[[Get the USB->Meeting at Oak No]]
[[Get the Gun->Picked The Gun Up]]
[[Get the Bread Slicer->Investigate The Shadow]]
[[Return to inventory->Inventory Poetry]]QUESTION 1
What was the game "Mario Bros." initially released on?
[[A. NES->Q1Wrong]]
[[B. Arcade->Q1Right]]
[[C. MSX->Q1Wrong]]
[[D. Atari 2600->Q1Wrong]]WRONG!
You lost the quiz and passed out
[[Wake up->World Map]]CORRECT!
Next question!
[[Answer Next Question->Gamer Quiz Question 2]]QUESTION 2
In Metal Gear Solid, what is Meryl's Codec code?
[[A. 140.15->Q2Right]]
[[B. 140.45->Q1Wrong]]
[[C. 240.23->Q1Wrong]]
[[D. 240.32->Q1Wrong]]CORRECT!!
Next Question.
[[Next Question->Gamer Quiz Question 3]]FINAL QUESTION
Before Tom Kalinski became president of Sega Of America, where did he work?
[[A. Hasbro->Q1Wrong]]
[[B. Parker Brothers->Q1Wrong]]
[[C. Atari->Q1Wrong]]
[[D. Mattel->Q3Right]]CORRECT!
YOU PASSED!
Here's your reward:
//I Saw The World
I saw through the kaleidoscope
A world remade out of emeral
Without a trace of the paper one
Penciled in for today
This repetition of our rotation
Like an hourglass spinning among locks
Creates a need for time
And Destroys what we create.
One day I will spin into our fated meeting
Wrapping my heart in tin and zinc
Until we begin again
With a consistent pulse
Breaking.
Making.
Prepared to wind down.//
''OBTAINED NEW POEM''
(font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #3: END]]]
[[Return to The Store->The Store]]//I saw through the kaleidoscope
A world remade out of emeral
Without a trace of the paper one
Penciled in for today
This repetition of our rotation
Like an hourglass spinning among locks
Creates a need for time
And Destroys what we create.
One day I will spin into our fated meeting
Wrapping my heart in tin and zinc
Until we begin again
With a consistent pulse
Breaking.
Making.
Prepared to wind down.//
[[Return to poetry->Poetry]]DISCLAIMER: BEFORE YOU ARE PERMITTED TO HAVE FUN
Hey, it's me. We here at The Bakers Dozen love our story focused drama, but this area of the game is a little different. There is no major end goals here, just some mini-games and side quests to do. To return to a more story driven route, go back to the title screen via the menu.
Have fun exploreing the world of...Erm... This place!
[[Enter the World Map->World Map]](Link:"Resume Game")[(goto:(history:)'s last)]
(link:"SAVE GAME")[(if:(save-game:"Slot A"))[Game Saved!]]
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]]Hey. It's Nick, the narrator.
[[Before you begin, I have to comment: A fourth wall breaking finale? Really? You already broken the fourth wall too much for that to have an impact->Fourth Wall Address]]
[[Hi, Nick the narrator->The Final Route 2]]Well, you got me there. But that was more for comedic effect than anything else. More of a "running into your house to throw a custard pie in your face" idea. This is me dressing up to come into your home for a formal dinner.
[[Fair enough. What did you want to say?->The Final Route 2]]I wanted to thank you for playing this game for this long. I'll be honest, I don't know why you have played it for this long. Maybe you're a friend of mine. Maybe you stumbled upon this, years after I initially put it up. Maybe this is my legacy, after doing something else that ganers attention, and you traced it to this little text adventure. I don't know what you think of it, but regardless, I'm happy someone at least saw this.
I don't even know if it's good or not because I've been looking at this for so long. The only people that I know of to have tried it are friends, and I'm too insecure to know if my friends mean it or not. That's just how it is for me. The first people I want to show my game to, and the last people I'll know liked it or not.
My most sincere thanks goes out to the ones who are strangers. That's about as genuine as it can get. Someone who knows nothing about you as a person saying they liked something you created. That's the art standing by itself, and an artist couldn't be happier.
[[You're welcome->The Final Route 3]]Heh. I don't know if you mean that or not because that was your only option there. But thank you regardless.
You're only reading this because you chose to escape. You probably wouldn't have started that uprising or fought a legion of 13 bakers if this was your real life. You probably would have said "Good Morning" and went into that dull, life sucking routine. But here, in the context of the game, you chose to escape from that routine. You saw and did things that were far more enriching than an endless loop of depression. You may or may not have had fun, but the point is you did something about it.
Now, all I ask from you is to apply that outside this screen. You aren't bound out there by the choices I provide, like you are in here. You can even choose to ignore the message inside this game. That's fine. But as long as you choose to. You can do whatever you like, and face whatever those consequences may be. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Right. Now.
[[Return to the Title Screen to spend some more time here->Title Screen]]
[[Exit the game->Exit Game]]I'll let you do the honor.
I hope you enjoyed your time here!Below is a list of notes for what's new in The Bakers Dozen. Possible spoilers.
''UPDATE VERSION 1.2''
* Fixed infinite sword attack glitch in Bakers Dozen Route
* Fixed instances where game would not register actions done more than once
* Updated Final Boss in Bakers Dozen Route
* Added Final Route
* Added Side Quest #4
* Added Patch Notes Screen. The one you're reading right now.
* Due to Save Data not carrying between updates, we will leave this version of the game up. However, for newcomers, the best version to start with is the latest version, so if this is not the latest update, please choose that one.
[[Return to Title Screen->Title Screen]](font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #4: CHRIS AND THE BAR TENDER]]]
You ran into Chris. Chris Kellington, specifically. You know way too many Chris's to leave it at just Chris. You ask him how he's been and he says he's ready to kill himself. Jokingly of course, but you have to wonder after so many times if he's serious.
He is sitting at the bar completely still. He hasn't ordered anything yet. You ask him what he's doing.
"Well, you see, I'm afraid I can't drink on an empty stomach. But I can't get anything to eat because I'm too busy checking out the bar tender to order something. At this rate, I'll starve... but look at those abs!"
(if:(history:)contains "Bought Cookies")[[[Here, take some of my cookies->Gave Chris Cookies]]]
[[Buy something yourself, you idiot->Told Chris Idiot]]You gave Chris some of the cookies you bought from the bakery. He ate them, and gained the courage to order a drink as a result
You watch Chris compliment the bar tender and his beautiful abs. He blushes, they chat, and next thing youasks Chris out on a date to Smoke Justice, which happens to be both of their favorite resturaunts.
A romance has begun, all thanks to you buying cookies and giving some to Chris. Weird.
(font:"Ariel")[(text-color:"Orange")[(css:"text-size 150%")[SIDE QUEST #4: END]]]
[[Return To Bar->Bar Snack]]Chris became even more sad. You monster.
[[Return to Bar->Bar Snack]]